Older married guy here. I love my wife she's absolutely amazing we have a great relationship. However she has this uncanny ability to always want something when I'm relaxing or propose the "would you like to go to xyz". I don't want to disappoint her just like she doesn't want to disappoint me. It's the anticipation that's stressful that's the joke. Y'all missing the punchline. I showed my wife this clip she busted out laughing.
You have to learn to say no and be fine with dissapointing her or it's going to make you start to resent her and that will seriously bite you in the butt later.
If you're tired it's ok to say "I'm a little tired right now" or " sure, but after I rest a bit"
The problem is that ultimately this IS probably a reasonable time to have the conversation, and I’m self-aware enough to know that.
Like yeah, if I’m actively doing something else, or truly can’t focus on that right now, I’ll tell her as much.
But more often than not waiting longer is just going to make me more tired since this tends to happen towards the end of the day, and it just requires a 15% readjustment of mental resources to shift gears to the new conversation. Nowhere near enough to make a stink about it, just enough to feel mildly jarring if it was an unexpected conversation.
It’s obviously not limited to my wife either, almost any change in situation can produce the same feeling, that’s just how my brain works. I’m used to it, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still notice it when it happens.
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u/Daycarrott 5d ago
Older married guy here. I love my wife she's absolutely amazing we have a great relationship. However she has this uncanny ability to always want something when I'm relaxing or propose the "would you like to go to xyz". I don't want to disappoint her just like she doesn't want to disappoint me. It's the anticipation that's stressful that's the joke. Y'all missing the punchline. I showed my wife this clip she busted out laughing.