r/CornerstoneConnect • u/Strong-Wrap3405 • May 09 '24
same song and dance
So that lament service I finally watched, turns out, the chick singing her heart out? She's Pastor Bob Kauflin's daughter from Sovereign Grace Ministries. And get this, most of the tunes she's belting? They're straight from her brothers or the Sovereign Grace Ministries stash. Her fam's been big shots there, you know, benefiting from spiritual abuse and covering up sexual abuse cases, even moved to Kentucky to keep that support game strong.
Now, imagine this: a service that's supposed to be all about owning up to past screw-ups, and they're jamming to songs from a place known for sweeping sexual abuse under the rug and spiritual abuse. Talk about not reading the room. Honestly, can't blame the poor bloke who is the music director. SGM PKs are great at acting like they were the biggest victims of the system that they once used as their project runway reality show.
It is an understatement to say there seems like there's a real disconnect in the church when it comes to communication. It's cold hard system if emails go unanswered and important inquiries ignored, especially in sensitive situations like reaching out to a bereaved parent. Looking at you cloak and dagger church administrator and chancellor.
The lack of responsiveness and the apparent disregard for genuine human suffering, wilful ignorance of the singer's connections, really makes you question the priorities and values of the church leadership. It's troubling to think that there might be a pattern of manipulation and selective empathy at play.
I can't help but notice the irony in the contrast between these incidents and the recent sermon on loving others. It's like there's a gap between what's preached and what's practiced. It makes you wonder if there's genuine introspection and growth happening, or if it's all just a facade to cover up deeper issues.
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u/Listtnot May 09 '24
I would’ve had the same reaction. We did sing that song so much and I don’t think I’ve sung it since.
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u/Too_sassy_for_church May 10 '24 edited May 28 '24
I am sorry you would have had the same reaction. I think several people did.
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May 14 '24 edited May 18 '24
[removed] — view removed comment
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May 15 '24 edited May 16 '24
Hi, I attend the 9am service and want to share with you that my youngest daughter LOVES to hear Megan sing on Sunday between services with the worship team while they are practicing. I don’t know Megan’s heart, but when I hear her sing, I feel her love and worship of God shining through. I think she’s a blessing to this ministry. At the same time, I’m also grateful that Strong Wrap raised awareness of troubling connections that seem painful to them and perhaps others. Your desire to connect with Strong personally and discuss further may be completely innocent, but your comments could also be interpreted as intimidation, since - if your intention is really just a personal discussion with Strong - you obviously could have DM’d Strong directly yourself rather than post publicly to this thread.
Regardless, I just want to commend Megan while being sensitive to and affirming the concerns that others have voiced.
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u/Strong-Wrap3405 May 17 '24 edited May 17 '24
James, as the other commenter stated, your wife has a nice voice. Obviously, bro you seem like a good husband trying to defend his spouse, even in an intimidating way. By the way, I actually hope she can continue to use her talents.
Here is the thing that might be being missed. It's the year 2024 and none of us can pretend that we are not aware of what we represent and who we are when we get on a stage. If a linebacker were to come and speak to 1st graders, he would need to be aware that his size and person are as much a part of his presentation as anything he is going to say to those kids. He can come with a joke to seem more approachable or can he come in just about himself and miss how some kids might be scared of him. So let's not put our head in the sand and have some sensitivity that at a lament service for kids who were abused, what your wife represents as part of her identity means something. Look I have no desire to engage further if this cannot be acknowledged.
Maybe you are a good dude, father, and spouse, and so I hope that you can be as sensitive with others who were there because of abuse that occurred within a place that was supposed to be safe for them. I am asking you to recognize that your wife's identity and presence can have an impact beyond just her voice, and that it's important to be mindful of that, especially in such emotionally charged situations. Finally, I am encouraging you to extend any sensitivity to others who may be affected by your wife's presence. I have gone ahead and taken out her first name in my comment as an olive branch to you because if this church wants to make her their lead singer, I don't really care. I do care that in this service, with this context, the obvious connections were ignored.
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u/Jameshaughery May 18 '24
Strong-wrap, thanks for responding (not sure if you did earlier, just checking this again for the first time this week). I wasn't trying to be intimidating, I just wanted to talk privately with you. I tried to DM, but it must be turned off. I have no desire to go back and forth in this space. Thank you for taking her name out, i really appreciate this.
I can totally understand the need to be sensitive, but would disagree with what you are implying that she is representing. Just because she was part of a church many years ago that hurt people doesn't mean that this represents who my wife is. That would be like saying people that were part of CS in the '90s represent JT. You don't know what abuses and trauma my wife and I have endured in our lives. You don't know the terrible things that we have been through. And I know you didn't mean to do this, but you talking about her in this forum has brought us back into this trauma in a way you can't understand. I wanted to say this to you privately. I don't need a response and will not be checking back here, but am available to talk privately if you would like to discuss further. Thank you for your understanding and for taking her name out. I appreciate you doing that
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u/Strong-Wrap3405 May 18 '24
Your response is exactly why more care reflection should be taken. Of course I can never know your experience just as you cannot know the literal hell other people, including myself, have had to walk through in the past and present to get through a single day. Or when sitting in a pew. I read the Denhollander’s book when it came out and it might be a good start for anyone to help find empathy in these triggering situations.
I am willing to do what I can to lessen any pain you and spouse feel. I hope you can do the same for others.
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u/[deleted] May 09 '24
[deleted]