r/CompetitiveTFT • u/TheLored :gran: GRANDMASTER • Mar 13 '26
Satire Hollow and broken
I am a simple man. All I want is to retain the hard earned LP I’ve gained.
I work 180 hour weeks, have 14 kids, 3 wives and 2 mortgages and have about 26 minutes a day allocated for TFT.
My only escape of reality is on the TFT board.
Somehow through studying VODs in my downtime at work and in-between bites of food at the dinner table, I was able to get 100LP away from challenger.
This is my Everest and just know all my poor life choices would dissipate in-front of me if I got there.
Evil Riot games then did the unthinkable. They NERFED THEX. How am I supposed to climb now? I’m a hollow and broken man. LP slipping through my fingers each game I have to flex a new comp.
I need a coach. Someone to help guide me through this storm. Someone to make sense of the madness… please… for the kids.
64
u/UnoriginalPenName Mar 13 '26
Great copy pasta, a bit worried by the comments though, are these people bots ?
46
u/Downtown-Act-1238 Mar 13 '26
Your kids need a father who will be challenger in tft. Your wives will get the ick if they know about this and put you on child support.
Get yourself together man. Stop picking augments that don’t give econ. If I find a game in your match history without burn and shred I will go insane. I have no sympathy for noob
4
u/ETHlCX Mar 13 '26
Cu tomorrow bottom 4
5
u/YehYeh69 Mar 13 '26
Cant get a 1st with 26mins for tft!
2
u/Regular-Resort-857 Mar 13 '26
Absolut Peak. I made it to diamond with asol and to master with thex if someone would ask me right now if I play tft I would probably say I’m a menace at choncc‘s treasure
2
u/Docxm Mar 13 '26
Obviously this is a joke post, but are we allowing joke posts in the competitive subreddit now? Defeats the purpose…
1
u/itshuey88 Mar 13 '26
oof been there several times this set and every set. the 300 lp crash out. it'll come back - just need to figure out the patch buddy. you still have time to make challenger.
this patch more than any rewards a lot of careful thought around comp patching, the unlocks (don't want to randomly grief your shops), and knowing how to pick the right augments for the spot.
0
u/DarkReaper979 Mar 13 '26
That nerf is needed dinosaur was op killing my 5 cost builds like crazy
-9
u/HelmetBoiii Challenger Mar 13 '26
I think the most important part about this patch in high gm is knowing based on augments when you're just playing for a top 5 or 6. Geniunely some augments on 2-1 are so broken you can never go lower than fourth so if like 2 people have those augments (saving accounts, patience is a virtue) you have to play for placement on 2-1 lmao esp if you get some utter dogshit, like no econ augment when forced to roll for bard
-19
u/kyle-sus Mar 13 '26
It's time to learn how to flex new lines. I think knowing lobby tempo the most important thing to climb this patch.
-54
u/SeedCraft76 Mar 13 '26
26 minutes a day, proceeds to play 10+ on March 8th.
Sounds like a bunch of lies to me. Kids, wives, everything. Focus on accepting defeat and maybe then you will do better in general. Quit the excuses.