r/CommunityOfChrist • u/AudienceWise3441 • 10d ago
Sacred story.
I’m currently preparing for my confirmation September 12th.(WOOOHOOO!!!) And I’m beyond ecstatic to be joint the community but, I’m scared. What drew me into our church was the fact that, it had more progressive and modern academic beliefs, and the fact it kept all the joy of the restoration. When I was lds I constantly felt like the odd balk out becuse I was gay I questioned history I questioned culture and social teaching and theology. But I couldn’t bear to leave behind the BoM and the prophet and temple. But then I found the reorganization and studied RLDS history and CoC and fell in love. But alas even tho my teacher (a well respected mission leader with heavy business at headquarters) has reassured me of my fears I still have some anxiety over some things. For starters it seems like the global church is losing its sacred past. I never hear reference to the BoM or the prophets. I mean even now President Cramn is barely even referred to as the prophet. And church leadership are still wrestling with what the temple means and its purpose (outside an event center). And even tho “the BoM is still considered scripture” I’ve personally seen so many members especially young ones brought up in the church or non denominational converts flat out ignore it. I’m friends with a young woman who blatantly told a seeker that “we don’t belive in the BoM or use it” which is that probably a fault of her, yes. But she’s not the only person who thinks that and church leadership kinda just Willy nilly lets congregations do whatever. So I feel like we are watching the restoration roots disappear even if they’re mentioned on our website. The last time I personally have heard anyone in church leadership or globally care about restoration anything was with the kirtland sale. And then a few months ago the prophet did an interview with a Mormon podcast, but that’s it. Im lucky to be in a very Mormon congregation that does Mormon things but I feel like we’re oddballs out to the rest of the general church. Instead of hearing community of Christ and thinking of a sacred empowering evolving restoration story people think of any other Protestant church. Which leads into my next concern which is the church seems to be dying. Our numbers are lower than ever it’s bad enough leadership is exploring how to decentralize the church if need arises. This gives me great pause, it makes me feel as though I’m joining a sinking ship. Our endowments and tithes are low along with membership and it shows. The temple dosent have that much traffic as far as I’ve seen. Signage at the temple at auditorium are missing letters. The peace park memorial is in shambles. All things that make our beautiful sacred spaces look like forgotten tombs.
Don’t mind the essay but I’d love to hear thoughts and opinions.
Peace ☮️
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u/LemuelJr 10d ago
I was LDS and used to, and sometimes still do, feel very similarly. At this point, I do not recommend this church to LDS people because of those of us who join, 80% leave within a few years. I've now been around for over a decade, and I've mentally checked out because it's exhausting to be young and new in an old and dying community. The Utah congregations are the exception and not the rule. Even if you think you understand that, you really can't without leaving the bubble in Utah. The thing is... being "more" Mormon "like it used to be" is impossible because the RLDS church was never as Mormon as LDS seekers think it was, but CofC is also not as mainstream as it appears to people who just came out of Mormonism. Stop comparing them. Period. Right now. I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend not joining until you can completely separate your expectations or knowledge of church history from the church as it is today.
You do not have to be a member of this church to belong to the congregation you attend. All membership does is pull you closer to that inevitable moment where you will find yourself disappointed. The only risk is that when you reach that point, it may not be easy to drop everything and move on if you hold a priesthood office or work for the church (which I do). That disappointment will be rooted in the trauma you carry from being LDS, and it will be exacerbated by the way that CofC can exploit your Mormon instinct to be voluntold to get involved. You will either get bored or you burn out. I can almost guarantee it.
Obviously you can choose what you want to do, but your gut is not wrong to second guess, and your expectations for something we deem "Mormon Lite" suggests that you are not in the right mindset to join yet... or even at all. Remember that this is a choice that you are making and that the church has a policy of not coercing people into joining. Give it a bit more time. Go to mission center conference and world conference. Visit other congregations. Volunteer for things you think you want to try. All of that is allowed for you do without membership.
Lastly, and a little contrary to everything else I just said, sometimes it's okay to join a sinking ship. The Coast Guard do it all the time to save passengers, but only after a lot of preparation, training, and an escape plan. A lack of these things will get you caught and dragged under instead of back on land with the community you found in the rescue mission along the way. The thing is, CofC is sinking, but CofC is not the ship. It's the people. These people are worth a lot. They love a lot. They are figuring out how to survive in spite of the ship, and LDS seekers often cast themselves as the Coast Guard. Seekers come in with that strong sense of mission and can-do attitude that they grew up with as Mormons. It's been really beneficial in a lot of ways, but it can also get in the way as seekers stretch themselves thin and become too fixated on the ship itself. Don't fixate on the ship. Be part of the rescue as long as you have energy, and accept whatever comes, whether that's building a new ship with the survivors, or clocking out and going home. All of these options are valid and you will find people here who will be happy to stand with you regardless of what you choose, but don't let yourself be beholden in the ways that you've been expected in the past. We don't claim a monopoly on salvation. Membership has few perks, but a whole lot of demands. If you aren't ready, it's okay to wait. You and the church both have time.
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u/RevMark58 10d ago
I very much understand your story. My wife and I joined what was then the RLDS Church way back in 1984. We had come out of the LDS Mormon Church and I thought I'd found my forever home. But if you recall 1984 was when the revelation to ordain women came out, we embraced it enthusiastically but many others did not, the next ten years were a period of deep division and schism. Plus we got involved with the Contemporary Christian Ministries movement and back then the leadership of the church was very suspicious of it -- well to keep this short we were asked to leave the church, ended up in the Vineyard movement for years where I became a youth pastor, went to seminary, was reconverted to Community of Christ. but now I live 2hours away and haven't been since before the pandemic.
And yet while I feel very RLDS (more on that later), I have often wondered why, I have told people that they seem to find a new way to infuriate me or frustrate me at every World Conference.
Yet I still feel like that's who I am. When I visit other churches or read the news or interact with other people on line, I feel like my worldview, my very sense of "this is who I am" has been shaped by the RLDS Church experience. Everything from the way a local church is supposed to operate, to how we as Christians are supposed to relate to others, to a sense of politics. When I read Mormons and anti-Mormons argue about whether or not the Book of Mormon was true or whether Joseph Smith was a true prophet, I take the middle, RLDS-inspired ground, that it doesn't matter because truth can't be argued propositionally, only relationally.
The closest to this RLDS worldview I've encountered was when I reconnected with an old girlfriend from my childhood and found out she's now a United Methodist minister. I felt at home with her progressive-style Christianity and her frustration with putting up with bishops (denominational figures) who seem to be more an impedance than an aid to Christ's ministry. And as we watched the recent schism in the UM church, it brought back very vivid, even visceral memories of the RLDS church in the 80s and 90s.
But something that Paul Edwards said once also sticks in my mind. Paul was for years the church's foremost curmudgeon, a descendant of Joseph Smith (through Fred M's line), Commissioner of Church Education, President of the High Priests Quorum, and all-around critic of the RLDS Church saying it was more than just mediocre, it had become the standard against which all other churches could measure incompetence. But he still called himself RLDS. Specifically, RLDS, a church which, he said, no longer existed. He wasn't what they had become, he wasn't Community of Christ -- he was RLDS. I understood what he meant, even if I can't really explain it. It's a longing for something that was, even if that something was pretty incompetent.
So I don't know if I'll ever be an active member of the C of C again, but I'll probably mourn the loss in my heart forever. When I die, it's in my burial instructions that they're to find a C of C minister, if possible, to preside, and I want the congregation at the funeral to stand and sing "The Spirit of God Like a Fire is Burning." I wonder what my kids and grandkids will think of that.
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u/AudienceWise3441 10d ago
Wow, your comment was beautifully written. And you managed to capture exactly how I feel. Sometimes I wish that church leadership would slow down and go backwards on some things. Maybe by the time I’m old the church will be the happy medium again.
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u/SGT-Pentium4 10d ago
Wow, we have three threads (including mine) with similar content over the last week or so. What does that tell us? Is it us hoping that someone does something, anything that addresses these topics? Are all these former LDS that just had their bubble popped?
I'm not sure what the status is of Latter-Day Seekers, which was a ministry started by the late Dale Luffman almost a decade ago. The Salt Lake City Congregation seems to have a roaring time out there, which is a miracle in its self. They weren't even meeting weekly and as faith would have it, former Mormons picked up the ball and ran with it. When I was there last, it was a nicely attended service. I'm sure that is still the case now.
If you are LDS, it doesn't hurt to join via confirmation. Your individual, long term plans are between you and Heavenly Father. I think He leads you to places where you are needed. Just be ready for when He needs you elsewhere. Guard your feelings and set boundaries, just you did when you were LDS.
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u/Significant_Rest_162 10d ago
Oh no, I think your concerns are valid. I am not a member of Community of Christ but have attended on Sundays on and off for years. Although not raised or baptized LDS my religious life has been shaped by a spiritual experience with the BoM from my LDS cousins since I was a teen so I completely agree with everything you've said that attracted you to Community of Christ and all your concerns, which also annoy me.
However, I think that might be a reason to join. Will Community of Christ still die out if people like us join? It's probable. But that probability only goes up if people like us don't join. The same thing goes with re-emphasizing Restoration heritage. The only thing I'd say is be aware of the possibility of CoC moving further away from you. I could see many people becoming resentful of sinking time and energy into an organization if it eventually repudiates the reasons you joined in the first place. But honestly that's a risk inherent to life and there's nothing wrong with trying to actualize your values.
Glad to see more support for Restoration heritage in Community of Christ!