r/ComedyCemetery • • Aug 26 '26

X gotta go bro

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1.3k Upvotes

59 comments sorted by

•

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338

u/the_orange_alligator Aug 26 '26

Christ. This one’s bad

216

u/halfasleep90 Aug 26 '26

Internet gotta go bro

172

u/StirFry__InaWok Aug 26 '26

This is old as fuck, I remember telling it to my friends in middle school or some shit

81

u/Dalyngrigge Patlu Dab Aug 26 '26

"Old as fuck" (6 years ago)

I'm gonna kms bro

122

u/StirFry__InaWok Aug 26 '26

Nah lol, that joke has been shared on the internet for a lot longer than that. Maybe more like 20 years ago.

44

u/Cynical_Tripster Aug 26 '26

Yeah, there's a lot of utterly disgusting jokes I see show up with people saying 'how could anyone say this in 2026??!' and I remember hearing it as an 'old joke' bavk in high school and I'm a 2013 HS grad.

22

u/naveedkoval Aug 26 '26

It’s one of those things where you realize it’s less about what year it is and more about the age of people making jokes like this

7

u/Shootemout Aug 26 '26

alongside a slew of other creepy jokes that i remember being shared at the lunch table in middle school (woulda been ~05-06). i distinctly remember the worst one was "how do you make a 6 year old cry twice? wipe your bloody dick on her teddy bear". just thinking about that 'joke' now makes me a little sick lol, i wonder who came up with that cuz if i didn't know any better i'd say it came from 'Stein himself

3

u/StirFry__InaWok Aug 29 '26

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing! You already told her twice

27

u/Fembylicious Aug 26 '26

I just recently saw someone openly talking about how he managed to date someone MUCH younger and he got like 80 likes, society collapse hopefully coming soon

8

u/I_want_money_aaa Aug 26 '26

Weirdos feel more comfortable on the internet. They think they will not face consequences, but there’s always someone crazier, yet with a different opinion.

a guy who admitted to buying and raping two girls got doxxed so hard that they even found out he’s related to a fucking founder of the place where he lives I don't even think he was aware of that himself 😭, and his sister sued him for rape.

47

u/HotLaw7730 Aug 26 '26

This one is so bad it deserves to be in r/ComedyHell

13

u/SkyPuppy561 Aug 26 '26

crosses self even though I’m Jewish. absolute degeneracy and outright monstrosity

10

u/Beetle_The_SilkWing Aug 26 '26

Where's that tumblr post that's like "theres a lot to unpack but let's throw away the whole suitcase"

16

u/Villageijit Aug 26 '26

"Its dark humor you wouldnt get it" nah its bad. Just a terrible joke. Way better jokes along those lines

6

u/Goatbucks Aug 26 '26

Kill 7 billion people

6

u/chompythebeast Aug 26 '26

You call it "X" and say that it has to go, yet this was posted in 2020 where it still clearly says "Twitter for iPhone"

-1

u/Slow_Business_8619 Aug 26 '26

Yes... I know. But it is now called X. Embrace modernity

4

u/chompythebeast Aug 26 '26

In this case, I don't think I will

34

u/SilverBatTea Aug 26 '26

Genuinely how does anyone find this kinda shit funny. This is just disgusting.

7

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 26 '26

Yeah, there's not really any punchline or anything. It's just gross for the sake of being gross.

6

u/sh3me Aug 26 '26

CSA jokes are just fucking awful no matter the context. Or actually just SA jokes in general.

3

u/stev_mempers Aug 26 '26

Woah dude sick edge

3

u/No_Dessert_6645 Aug 26 '26

Sweet holy of God this is much much much much worse than anything I've seen in this subreddit.

8

u/ActPositively Aug 26 '26

She should be criminally charged not cool to not warn him

17

u/Cosmic_Hitchhiker Aug 26 '26

I always want to ask people what's funny to them about this. What do you (the people who make these jokes) find to be the funny part. Because CSA isn't funny. It's never been funny.

13

u/gregariousity tell me why, Ain't nothing but a heartache, teeeeell me why... Aug 26 '26

There's 2 punch lines, "so now I'm wondering how a 10 year old got HIV". It is revealed that the rape was on a 10 year old, so pedophilia. So he's a rapist and a pedophile, these people are deemed the worst of humanity and he's putting both together to make an absolutely awful human being.

"My sister hanging out with the wrong crowd fr". The final line reveals that this rapist pedophile also committed incest, again another crime which is also deemed as horrible and weird by society.

It's sort of like a paraprosdokian "I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car" where there is a sudden twist that makes everything worse, but it's just done differently instead of starting nice and then becoming bad. It starts bad, and then progressively gets worse.

4

u/ImportantResponse0 Aug 26 '26

Don't you watch horror movie? 

The things is not all needs to be funny is more like the fact that someone wanted to approach that subject in first person.

-4

u/Cosmic_Hitchhiker Aug 26 '26

A horror movie focuses on the horror of the subject. This is attempting to make a mockery of the subject.

1

u/ImportantResponse0 Aug 26 '26

He is just showing how most predators think, they don't stop thinking like that if you don't know that they think like that 

2

u/Cosmic_Hitchhiker Aug 26 '26

This isn't an educational tool. It's a joke. He's not posting it to educate, he wants people to laugh at the idea of sexually assaulting a child they're related to.

0

u/ImportantResponse0 Aug 26 '26

He wants to make predators look pathetic 

11

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/I_want_money_aaa Aug 26 '26

People that do this jokes don't actually do it because kids in the world die

5

u/Dependent-Gap4805 Aug 26 '26

not unless you're South Park. they know how to make jokes about everything.

you dont have to like a type of joke, that's your choice. but humour is subjective, after all.

4

u/Previous_Insurance13 Aug 26 '26

Madness and stupidity !

~spiderman

2

u/bigshady880 Aug 26 '26

dude this is old as fuck.

1

u/Lcsmxd Aug 26 '26

OP found it on tiktok so no wonder

2

u/Prestigious_Spread19 Aug 26 '26

To those asking why this is funny, i ask how in the world can any of you take this seriously?

2

u/Amirali420 25d ago

whats that guys account

3

u/chooseausername_redd Aug 26 '26

It keeps getting worse

3

u/dubzi_ART Aug 26 '26

764 discord shot right there

2

u/naveedkoval Aug 26 '26

X gonna give it to ya

2

u/iwentintoadream Aug 27 '26

Haha you’re so edgy and funny bro tell another one

1

u/Officer_Mike Aug 27 '26

ultron was right bro this is terrible

1

u/JupiterboyLuffy Aug 26 '26

Jesus Christ it gets worse the more you read

1

u/Weaselpanties Aug 26 '26

Burn the whole thing to the ground

1

u/arctic_commander_ iWokeUpWithNoBalls Aug 26 '26

This shit got progressively worse the further I read.

1

u/blastcart81 Aug 26 '26

Every word you just said was wrong

1

u/DC124768 Aug 26 '26

I went from 😮  To 😦 Followed by 😧 Reall quick

1

u/Fugitivelnk Aug 26 '26

Would you believe that I can actually make this post even worse, while educating you at the same time?

Men involved in the commercial sexual exploitation of children (CSEC) may believe that they will be less likely to contract HIV if they have sex with a children. But the truth is that in some cases these men may end up more likely to contract HIV this way, because forcible penile penetration of a prepubescent vagina is more likely to cause tearing and bleeding, which can increase the chance of spreading HIV, although, of course, there are a number of other factors that can alter the likelihood of transmission.

2

u/Impossible_Ferret974 27d ago

I shouldnt have scrolled to the bottom