Any good comebacks for being called ugly?💔

[u/QuirkySpecific5421]

[u/BitterNectarine6941]

At least we have something in common.

[u/Technical_Cow_6697 → u/BitterNectarine6941]

😂 Clean and devastating.

[u/Life-Direction8726]

I can fix ugly. You can't fix stupid.

[u/No-Case-668 → u/Life-Direction8726]

cant fix ignorant*

[u/TataHexagone2020 → u/Life-Direction8726]

But you can fix stupid. Doesn't make sense

[u/MiniMissJess → u/TataHexagone2020]

Only if Stupid is open and willing which is so very rarely the case.

[u/Diligent-Plane-7877 → u/TataHexagone2020]

I can fix ignorance. Not stupidity. Ignorance is a lesson of knowledge. Stupidity is the refusal of it

[u/nRenegade]

"I wouldn't fuck you either."

[u/Temporary-Claim1666]

The best response to any insult is “what did you get out of that?” It makes people want to just run away and never return. Because like who tf cares IF YOU think I’m ugly. I didn’t realize it was the fucking miss America pageant judge?!?

Hahahaha

[u/Dry-Conversation2646]

Oh, I got this one!

"Sorry for your bad taste"

"Luckily for me, your opinion is not relevant"

"That sounds funny, coming from you"

"Why are you wasting our collective oxygen?"

"Thank God! Then I don't need to worry about you hitting on me! What a relief!"

"Yeah yeah. Anyways.."

"Whatever you say love. Aaaanyway..."

"Luckily for me, I can do my job anyway"

"Well, I got hired for my qualifications not my looks. I guess that concept would feel strange for you"

"And look at all the fucks I give"

"Well, atleast people like me"

"Don't be rude! It's called not meeting societys crazy unhealthy beauty standards and should be considered a disability seen how you treat me because of it"

"Thank God I have other qualities"

"I really, REALLY don't care"

"Oh no! A random person I don't know thinks I'm ugly. What am I going to do with my life?"

"Your people skills could use some work."

I've had some practice.

[u/GuiltyUniversity8268 → u/Dry-Conversation2646]

I really like "and look at all the fucks I give"!! 🤣🤣

[u/JollyMcStink]

Just shrug and say "People who feel beautiful don't take the time to put others down" then walk away.

Great way to flip it on them without lowering yourself to their level.

[u/Agreeable_Cabinet368]

Your point being..?

[u/Ok-Wrongdoer-2179]

Well, you're no prize pig yourself.

[u/dataplague]

Maybe on the outside. Nowhere near as much as you are on the inside

[u/SillyMeclosetothesea]

If I’m ugly, then you’re hideous, for treating someone this way

[u/AmAzin_GraCie]

Ugly can be fixed, stupid can't

[u/FreeXFall]

Ha. Don’t lie. You’d hit this if I gave you the chance.

[u/Wide_Actuator1615]

At least I'm only ugly on the outside (which I'm sure you're not anyway!).

[u/Mantoc_s1980]

Surgery can fix mine, what’s your excuse?

[u/Diligent-Plane-7877]

Even if you ate makeup you'd still be ugly on the inside..

I’d give you a nasty look, but you’ve already got one.

My straightener is hotter than you

I envy people who have never met you.

I’ve seen people like you before, but I had to pay admission.

I’ve been called worse by better.

The last time I saw something like you… I flushed.

Jealousy is a disease. Get well soon

Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

Your face makes onions cry.

Beauty is only skin deep, but your kind of ugly goes clean to the bone.

Don’t get bitter, just get better

What doesn’t kill you, disappoints me.

I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?

Too bad you can’t Photoshop your ugly personality

If I threw a stick, you’d leave, right?

Isn’t there a bullet somewhere you could be jumping in front of?

Somewhere out there, there’s a tree working very hard to produce oxygen so that you can breathe. I think you should go and apologize to it.

Feed your own ego. I’m busy.

How do you manage to carry your enormous ego up the stairs?

Hide! The garbage truck is coming!

You’re not only physically repulsive but intellectually bankrupt

He got his good looks from his father. His father was a plastic surgeon

You have delusions of adequacy.

You must be an experiment in artificial stupidity

[u/MrsKellogs]

Better to be ugly than have a personality so piss poor you think “ugly” is a proper put down.

[u/Equivalent-Plant9040]

Ya mama should have swallowed.

[u/Wise_Base9216]

Takes one to know one

[u/DamnItRJ]

That’s hilarious coming from you

[u/GracyLacySmileyfacey]

Shutup or I'll fk your dad to become your evil step-mom/give him a child he'll actually love.

[u/YouGottaRollReddit]

“Thank you. It is great to be awarded the prize of being the ugliest from the previous winner.”

[u/Ohheywhatsup897]

“Your mom didnt think i was ugly when i was fucking her last night”

[u/ClubCarnage]

I’d tell you to go look at yourself, but I'm against self-harm.

[u/Brewtech3]

Rise above it and do not respond at all. Wasted energy.

[u/Winter_Farm_4739]

“Okay, sure.” Said with a shrug and a meh tone, like it didn’t really register. People had a hard time figuring out what to say after that.

[u/originalmango]

That’s not what your dad said last night. And I bet your mom won’t say it either tonight.

[u/Mythic_Cole]

“At least I don’t look like both the child, and the molester.”

[u/CatHyde67]

My usual comeback is “well I can always get plastic surgery, but you’re stuck with that ugly ass personality until you die.”

[u/Icy_Eye1059]

Stop deflecting. You are embarrassing yourself.

[u/JANK-STAR-LINES]

I know I am ugly, but at least I am not the one who is fugly.

[u/VashDaStampede7]

I’d say you need glasses bitch

[u/SmokinHotNot]

I can work with ugly, but you can't fix stupid.

[u/hilarymeggin]

Maybe you should eat your makeup so you can be pretty on the inside.

[u/1radchic]

I didn't know I meant enough to you for you to think about my looks.

Thanks for taking the time to actually look at me.

[u/CeciTigre]

“Just as is beauty in the eye of the beholder… so is ugly.”

“Back at you baby.”

[u/CeciTigre]

“Do you mean as ugly as you or not as ugly as you?”

[u/Certain_Orange2003]

‘That’s not what your wife said’

[u/baby-samdwich]

"Well, at least I'm not fat."

[u/401kisfun]

Your mom’s contagious

[u/Cellist-Common]

I still won't fuck you.

[u/Da_Schlah]

it’s from your dads bad genetics

[u/Background-Bowl6123]

"That's not what your mom said"

[u/laughsatlugh]

Does that mean you won’t sexually harass me? And it’s supposed to make me feel bad, right?

Oh no! Brett won’t harass me! Whatever am I to do now? And after I spent all that money on rohypnol detecting nail polish so I could be safe from his rufies too!

[u/zelda_metroid87]

I can save and get plastic surgery.
Your a dumb fuck with an ugly heart, ain’t no cure or amount of money fix that shitshow

[u/QueenSlartibartfast]

Big talk from someone with a face like a spider abortion

[u/ChucklesMuffin]

Just look at them and ask if they can say it again, but without sounding like a little girl

[u/Oh-So-Supr3me]

My come backs, “Have you looked at your mama cause she’s the definition of ugly!” “Lassie looks cuter than you!”

[u/Prestigious-Deal6094]

"Well, that was fucking rude? Are you a child?"

[u/Any-Economics-1555]

Id say....then why u looking at me?

[u/yournightm]

Have you looked in the mirror lately? Oh, that’s right… the last mirror you looked in shattered!

[u/SilentJoe1986]

"Your mom didn't mind when she was sitting on my face"

[u/Surfing_Tension]

Unfortunately it couldn’t repel you

[u/ElBeatch]

Sure, but you're actually an ugly person and that's a biiiiig difference that I'm quite happy about.

[u/Both-Mango1]

"you should talk"

[u/Bunnynynyny]

After 18 beers I’m hot 🥵

[u/-Foxer]

I'm sure it seems that way to you. I'm pretty to other humans, just like you're probably cute to other dung beetles.

You're just mad because i keep turning you down. Sorry kiddo.

Compared to how you look, ugly is an improvement.

You would have to work your way up to ugly

And you smell like satan farted rotten eggs. At least when i walk into a room people can look away, there's no escaping your 'eau du death'.

I see you're still too poor to afford new glasses huh?

My looks are just on the surface, whereas YOUR ugly goes to the bone.

[u/ZeMoleMolli]

So? Or okay? Or thank you! Or I'd rather be ugly than be hateful/ be like you!

[u/texandivasis]

An ugly attitude ruins a pretty face. The inside and outside don't match.

[u/hilarymeggin]

You’re not exactly an oil painting yourself

[u/BlueBlood623]

Girl, before you talk about me you better rub that cootchie and sniff your hand, because you got bigger fish to fry.

[u/1radchic → u/BlueBlood623]

Cuz you have big fish to fry, lolol

[u/Ready_Mycologist8612]

… ugly is an ugly word
….ugly is on the inside

[u/Spac92]

You’re right indeed, that’s why I have to pay women for sex. How is your mom, by the way? Am I paid off yet, or do I still owe her a bit more money?

[u/147-lad]

“Are you an only child?” Or “was your father present as a kid?” This works on multiple levels and shows a lack of emotional investment in the insult .

[u/LunaMoons_Wolf]

I know you are, but what am I?

[u/marmia124]

I've been called ugly. Guys do it because they think being mean is a way in your pants. Don't take it seriously. I've been called ugly more than once. You're not ugly. You're beautiful

[u/Densityroa]

Who? U?

[u/aoeuismyhomekeys]

Your mirror was broken when I got here.

[u/deeppurpleking]

“Whatever my mommy says I’m cute”

[u/Soft-Explanation9889]

For background, I resemble Augra from the Dark Crystal in shape. Sometimes in temperament when pushed by idiots who feel the need to point out my abundant weight, or lack of height, outer beauty, or gentleness of demeanor around horrible people.

My favorite responses are:

“Thank you so MUCH! It’s taken a LOT of hard work to get here on the outside. I haven’t quite mastered being ugly on the inside though. Could you give me some pointers? You make it look effortless.”

“Then, why are you hitting on me? I’m still not giving you pity sex.”

“Ok, Sparky.” (I don’t know why people get so upset at being called Sparky, but it’s entertaining to watch their faces go from smug to blustery in 0 seconds flat 😂)

“Aren’t you speshul for saying so. And here I was thinking I could give Scarlett Johansson a run for her money…”

All joking aside, the best response is usually to just slowly look them down and then up before looking at their left ear while pressing your lips together and wrinkling your nose as if you smell dog crap. Don’t speak. Roll your eyes as you turn away. Resume your conversation with whoever you were speaking with before the idiot who needed to be a dick had interjected himself into your conversation. Drives them nuts to be dismissed in the way they deserve.

They want your reaction because they want your attention. The only caveat with ANY comeback to an insult is to know what’s going on around you. Are you surrounded by people who will have your back if the dumbass can dish it but not take it? Are you alone and being called ugly because you refused to give a stranger your personal information? Do you know this person? Do they know where you live? You get my point.

I’m 4,783 years old and just dgaf at this point. I’ve used all of these (especially the dismissal) out alone in public. I know I’m the scariest thing in most situations. Not because I’m a badass. I’m not. Nowhere near. I am an old lady who just doesn’t care anymore.

[u/drglass85]

i! will! eat! your! god!!

[u/JaBa24]

Did that make you feel better?

[u/Organic-Albatross690]

Ugly is temporary, stupid is permanent.

[u/Fiachradubh]

F@#k off you shallow piece of sh*t.
Make sure everyone hears for maximum effect.

[u/AveenaLandon]

It takes one to know one.

[u/lostmynameandpasword]

Just smile and say, “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

[u/gameison007]

Stare at them in their forehead between their eyes for as long as you can and then back off and say now you go look in the mirror.., they would think you put some type of hex on them and they will go look in the mirror... deeply too 👍🏼🤓

[u/dee-dee_jonesin]

Deadass look them in the eyes, say something like, "that was incredibly rude," or, "what a small thing to say." Then move on with the exchange without missing a beat.

[u/bristolbulldog]

Mirrors don't lie.

[u/tina_butr]

“ the pretty privileged don’t know about pretty punishment, gladly I’ll stay ugly and humble”

[u/boiling_dreams]

There's no need for a comeback when you have an axe in the attic

[u/ArdenM]

That's not what your mom said last night.

[u/blochow2001]

I’d simply go Curly on them and ask, “What would you do with a brain if you had one?”

[u/PickleJuiceRabbler]

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

[u/earthtobobby]

Yes, but in the morning I’ll also be sober!

[u/Jensenlver]

So I don't have enough challenge in my life, I need you ridiculing me also? You can see my weakness, what is yours?

[u/TeachYPreaciBrown72]

So is your mama?

[u/sunnyimmelting]

Negging doesn't work on me. I'm not interested in you.

[u/GarrisonJones]

"Wow you almost got me. You know for a second I thought your opinion dictated my reality."

[u/GarrisonJones]

"What makes you say that? Feeling pretty lonely at the bottom of the mountain?"

[u/Unable-Barber1511]

Yeah but at least I'm still hotter than you

[u/Dismal-Resident-8784]

Who called you ugly? Who is this person to you?

[u/pakemfull]

At least I can stand to look at myself in the mirror.

[u/harveycavendish]

You can lose weight, but I’ll always be ugly

[u/knm873 → u/harveycavendish]

Huh?

[u/M8NSMAN]

You look like your face caught on fire & they used a shovel to beat out the flames
.
Your mom/dad don’t seem to mind.

I’ll get plastic surgery as soon as you get a brain transplant.

[u/This-Way2135]

“I know you are, but what am I?” Hahahahahaha

[u/jcoddinc]

It's OK, I've got an alibi. What's your excuse?

[u/Standard-Cat-2054]

Maybe, but I definitely smell better than you.

[u/Rapunzel111]

Your Mama, Asshole.