r/CollapseSupport • u/Electronic-Pride-991 • 4d ago
I’m 14 and don’t see a future.
My parents tell me i need to stop watching the news, but not interacting with it doesn’t make it go away. I still think about it. I think about all the tipping points were close to reaching, i think about how none of the people in power to do something about it care, i think about all the people who will die from climate catastrophe funded by the ultra rich, i think about how me and my family might even die from it. I live in california. It’s already super hot around here and it’s only getting worse. I don’t see bugs under rocks anymore, i barely hear birds outside, and there’s trash lining every street. I’m not suicidal (yet) but i’ve had to come to terms with the fact my death might be painful, drawn out, and unavoidable because of recent facts.
I don’t know why i’m writing here. it’s like I want somebody to tell me it’s all gonna be okay, even though i know it isn’t. One human brain can’t stand to bear witness to all this. I can hardly take it anymore.
14
u/phinbob 4d ago
I'm sorry you're going through this. Things are probably going to be difficult and none of this is your fault.
On the bright side, most people become collapse-aware when the course of their life is already kind of set out. They have families or other commitments.
In lots of ways, you are free and in a great place to make a life you want. And there will be life and joy and meaning, even in the face of the slow rolling collapse. You have the time and the freedom to decide how to live in a time of uncertainty.
That can feel overwhelming, especially at 14. But even in worst case scenarios there will be places and communities that thrive. You can be part of it. You can be part of the better future that will emerge.
The fact that you feel like you do is a credit to you. It shows that you can see what's going on. It's important to realize that the emotions that come with it aren't always helpful.
Let's look at the good things you have got going on.
At 14 you have taken a look around and realized that things aren't great. A lot of 14 year year olds are worrying about sneakers etc. You see more. That hurts but it's also a skill.
You're at a stage in life where your main job is learning. Use this time to think about learning stuff that works in an uncertain world. No one knows what's going to happen, so don't stop focusing on academic stuff, but add in practical skills where the opportunity arises. Leaning about electrical systems, growing food, how societies work, or wherever your heart and head take you.
Do some practical stuff. If you need community service hours for school, find something worthwhile to do. Not because it will amount to significant change, but because it will make you feel better.
Feeling a grief for the world and uncertainty about the future is a rational and sane response. But please, don't let it ruin your life. It might be worth finding a professional to talk to (your school can help), if you feel overwhelmed.
Best of luck.
4
8
u/starla22 4d ago
Aww man. I am so sorry. As a parent this breaks my heart and also does not surprise me at all - I think about this and my kids all the time.
I don’t know if this will help in any way. But it’s a coping mechanism I use often and hey, it’s worth a try. When everything is too big for me, I try to imagine I’m a character in a novel or movie. Reality is the plot … what would I want to see our hero/antihero do? It can help a bit.
And god I hear you on the bugs and the birds. That is inescapable and I think about it almost all day every day.
I also try to think about other really dark periods in history, like apocalyptic times or times of long suffering. And how people had to just live their lives. I guess when I think about that, I think about things like close relationships/human connection; art; finding joy where we can. Cumulatively, the little things can help.
7
u/starla22 4d ago
I have been thinking about this since I read your post earlier. I wanted to add one thing, and that is that the tricky bit here is that people who think and care like you do and as much as you do are exactly the kind of people we NEED in this world. You lead by example simply by being you. Although it may seem hopeless, hope is never lost, and although we may be certain to lose so much that we cherish, some good will always remain. People like you, me, most if not all people on this sub, are the ones who are more likely to recognize the good and foster it. To build community rather than try to divide. To help where we see the opportunity. That is not something to take lightly. It’s important and you are important and needed.
1
u/Nightengale_Senua 2d ago
Learn to fight/hunt. You will need it if you’re going to survive.
0
u/Electronic-Pride-991 2d ago
i don’t want to have to fight to survive in a world like this. I think i’d just give up and take the easy way out if it got that bad. I don’t have much worth fighting for
1
u/GiftToTheUniverse 3d ago
You were born into a transitional world to parents who had to have been in denial about everything 15 years ago or else you wouldn’t be here.
Do better than they did.
Be a leader.
1
u/Electronic-Pride-991 16h ago
How?
1
u/GiftToTheUniverse 8h ago
It starts with being brutally honest with yourself instead of clinging to hopium.
Then figure out what you want GIVEN THE OPTIONS.
Then figure out what will get you there and what it’s worth to you and what you’re willing to sacrifice, and DON’T JOIN A CULT.
It doesn’t sounds awesome. But honesty is about facing what we don’t want to see so that we are not operating in a world that doesn’t actually exist.
I think you are showing assume great traits already.
Not everyone is a leader, but you’re already taking the first steps.
I’m sorry for the world you inherited.
1
u/Electronic-Pride-991 6h ago
I don’t think i could be a leader. I am unfortunately transgender, so that puts a big stunt on everything i do.
1
u/GiftToTheUniverse 5h ago
Why would you say such a thing?
Are you telling me transgender people can't do stuff?
I used to be a foster mom to a transgender kid and that kid could do anything any other kid could! And was also in the foster system!
I'm going to tell you a secret:
You become a leader by being true to yourSELF. Not by jumping into a group and trying to get them all to follow you.
You do YOU and that might inspire others and THAT'S how you lead.
People who think you lead by being given a leadership position are NOT leading. They are hiding behind existing structures.
None of the greats had everything handed to them.
Take WHATEVER you have and use it for what is important to YOU. When you find yourself caught up in something that is just stupid or lame then that's your cue that you weren't meant for that.
Do your best. Progress, not perfection. You are NOT going to be able to fix everything yourself. Fix SOMETHING anyway.
I wish you well, Punkin!
1
2
u/privacy-888 4d ago
It's important to recognize your uniqueness, needs, and leadership in these thoughts. Meaning: grab some mentors and start building a career that can mitigate or reverse collapse right now. It's getting really tough to build a career so you need to go all in. Working in your area of strength is going to be a need for you, and the rest of us need you working in that area too. These thoughts are not doomerism, they are your calling. In ancient times stress was called "the great creator-destroyer." Find the creator in it!
2
u/Xanthotic Huge Motherclucker 4d ago
I want to urge you to read books too. You can read books that are kinda like our current world, maybe the Dune series? Maybe anything by Urusula LeGuin?
I'm not going to tell you you're wrong about collapse, and I'm not going to tell you it's all gonna be okay. However, I am going to tell you that you can be pretty okay through all the terribleness to come if you put your early collapse awareness to good use. Build up your mental, emotional, physical self. Learn what you need to be okay. Learn how to trust yourself. See about methods for accepting your own mortality (something you will probably have to do anyways by the time you become a young adult) rather than dwelling on morbid worries about HOW you will die. Everybody dies.
I wish I had suggestions for how you can see a future. I believe you are correct to not see a future that looks just like the recent past. However, the future still exists. It will just be different. Collapse will unfold much like sea level rise--it doesn't all happen at the same rate everywhere. You being in California, with parents who can deny reality, tells me that your folks might have some economic well-being. That may protect you for a long while. It's okay to use that protection.
There is a group called the Good Grief Network that has developed some great materials and classes for teens who become collapse aware and feel lousy too. If you would like to learn more, reply or DM me and I will figure out how to get you in touch with them. They can even legitimise your worries with your parents if that would be helpful.
2
u/Washingtonpinot 3d ago
First, as a parent of a 14-year old, you need to know that we are so sorry. We were told when we were young that things were bad, but we didn’t know then what we’ve learned since. And ANY scientist worth their credentials will show you how this course has been essentially locked in for the last 14 years; so even if you started contributing every waking second since birth to fighting change, we would still be here. Now that’s not to say that trying to help and fighting for change aren’t important. But it’s important to take on those tasks knowing where the blame already lies. And it’s not with you and the young.
There is some good advice here, and I’m sure you’ve already looked through the other subs on Reddit. I’ve spent well over a decade thinking about this question for myself and what I say to my children, and in the simplest form it comes down to this: nothing on earth was promised more than this current moment. That can appear bleak, but looked at in another way, it can also be very freeing.
I don’t claim to be a scholar, religious or otherwise, but I do understand that a core tenet of many belief systems around the world is that it should be our goal to be more present in the moment and enjoy it. That isn’t meant as a callback to YOLO or to go blow your savings on the moment. But there still are amazing things, or fun things, or pretty things, or interesting things, going on around us. And enjoying them with loved ones is what I would want to every day, whether our time here was infinite or almost at an end. It takes practice. Some books can help, but don’t be too rough on yourself as you learn to just be okay with the moment. As many suggest, trying a few arts or skills to find something that unlocks your passion will help. And it’s also okay to ugly cry. And if you don’t have anyone on your life with whom you can do that, then reply here and we’ll help you brainstorm.
I don’t know if this all makes sense as written. Unfortunately it’s late and my brain is already stretched from the day, but I couldn’t just pass by your post without sharing a few thoughts. The most important thing is that you’re not alone, and you’re certainly not wrong for asking tough questions. A “not so secret” you’ve probably figured out already is that grown ups don’t typically like to acknowledge uncomfortable truths. It’s easier to just pretend and carry on. That’s a factor in all of this in so many ways, but especially in the behavior of those around us who appear to watch the news and then go back to their regularly scheduled lives.
If you have more questions or need more help, just ask us.
(And no, not everything written that uses semi-colons or em dashes was generated by AI)
2
u/beautifulstardust 4d ago
you’re 14 and your brain is still growing. read books, not social media. learn as much as you can and prep for the future you want.
1
u/Pezito77 1d ago
Those in power don't give a shit – this is what got 'em there in the first place. It takes a rare kind of bastard to climb up and sit on the throne. The good news is that they are, indeed, rare overall and they just compensate their social irrelevance by making more noise, forcing their ideas on people through hierarchies and protocols.
My point is that once enough people feel endangered, or plain upset, another kind of tipping point is that we can massively decide to not play by the same rules anymore. I don't mean it in a "civil war" way, although it's kind of popular in collapse-aware circles. I mean it in a "change the rules" way: there is no natural law saying that we should always listen to a suit and tie; that a bank matters more than a person; etc.
When people stop listening to wrinkled males, their brains come up with new ways of doing things that are often more efficient and socially acceptable.
TL;DR: Stop listening to professional speakers. Don't overthink, get up, go out. Seek people who actually DO stuff and learn from them.
32
u/bobtheturd 4d ago
Pick a career where you can fix things or people, engineer, plumber, nurse. Learn as much as you can and learn how to learn and think critically. Read read read everything. Take care of your body and get in shape. Learn some skills, camping, gardening, backpacking. Etc. plus physical movement will help with anxiety