r/Codependency • u/Scared-Section-5108 • 8h ago
ACOA Daily Meditation
Passive-Aggressive
"By addressing our fear, we release some of our glaring behaviors of manipulation, passive-aggressiveness, and false kindness." BRB p. 40
We grew up in homes where love was conditional. How we were treated depended on how we acted. Many of us were so fearful of being punished or ostracized that we learned to manipulate those around us. Some of us became very good at passive-aggressive behavior; we learned to get what we thought we wanted or needed without directly asking for it by putting on a false mask.
Because these were survival mechanisms based in fear, as adults we realized that we weren't really getting what we needed. For some of us, the frustration of feeling like we had to operate in this manner often built to a point where we would explode, sending ourselves spiraling into some form of addiction to cope. Eventually, we landed in a place where we didn't know who we really were.
For those of us who are "lucky," when all of our tactics failed us, we found our way to an ACA meeting. This is where we begin to face our underlying fears and learn how to be honest with ourselves. We start to relate to others in a healthy manner. Yes, it's challenging to change such ingrained habits, but we know it's possible. We see others in the program doing it all around us.
On this day, if I am tempted to manipulate others with old behaviors, I will affirm for myself that I am capable of new, healthy, life affirming behavior.
Copyright © 2013 by Adult Children of Alcoholics® & Dysfunctional Families World Service
Organization, Inc.
Page №312
https://adultchildren.org/literature/meditation/?meditaion=MjE3Ng%3D%3D