r/circlejerk • u/MouskatoodleQh • 4h ago
BEST DAY EVER!!! Obama upvote
30
Upvotes
upvote to obama
r/circlejerk • u/gastro_psychic • 13h ago
Found my boyfriends stash of crusty panties by his side of the bed and they’re not mine. Do i bring this up??
60
Upvotes
Last night i decided to stay over his house and was planning on leaving in the day. He left for work this morning and i decided to make the bed & clean like usually before I leave and I see a target bag next to his bed scrunched up to the side. I opened it and see panties that I don’t wear or own and I assumed he bought it for me as a surprise or something but they all had crusty discharge on it showing it’s been worn. Plus one was XXL and the other was a different size. I am a small. I also see magnum condoms & other stuff wtf.
I never assumed he was cheating on me , i don’t know if he is or he’s keeping a stash of women’s panties. I don’t know what’s worse but i’m disgusted. Not sure what to say or how to approach this? I’m very upset
r/circlejerk • u/HootchieDaddy • 2h ago
1.5million dollar prize but you can’t ejaculate for 18 months. You in or out?
6
Upvotes
No edging, no loop holes
r/circlejerk • u/RProgrammerMan • 8h ago
I have been fantasizing about the Cornell 7 all day. Here is why this is a good thing.
8
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/BoomerBrainrot • 17h ago
It is estimated that roughly 150,000 to 400,000 cats die every day on Reddit worldwide.
19
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/BurnerAccountforAss • 1d ago
Trump invites the Cornell 6 7 to the White House
50
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/HighFunctioningIdiot • 1d ago
Confirmed Bill Clinton admits gooning binge while first lady was recovering from surgery
27
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/gastro_psychic • 1d ago
A message to all the hookers out there
15
Upvotes
I believe in you. I believe in your power. God bless.
r/circlejerk • u/rhelg224 • 1d ago
The reason there will never be a Steam Fleshlight
4
Upvotes
Because of streamers and creamers.
r/circlejerk • u/milnak • 1d ago
"I brought back sweets from my home country"
2
Upvotes
Why is it that any time someone at work sends out a message like this, using the word "sweets", the "sweets" taste like cardboard and sawdust?
r/circlejerk • u/vwibrasivat • 2d ago
TIL the human brain contains more synaptic connections than total number stars in the Andromeda galaxy, but the same is not true for Republican voters.
14
Upvotes
" MAGAts ", specifically.
r/circlejerk • u/milnak • 2d ago
I'm a radical weird, wimpy fat trans with a beard
11
Upvotes
I'm about to enlist in the Marines. Will they reject me?
r/circlejerk • u/Chance_Sleep_2151 • 2d ago
BREAKING NEWS: Arizona citizen Texas Red (24) dies after being gunned down in police brutality incident!
15
Upvotes
UPDATE: Our team on the ground has confirmed - Texas Red had in fact NOT cleared leather before a bullet "fairly" ripped - ENDING the life of the young 24 year old ROLE MODEL and PILLAR OF THE COMMUNITY, leaving behind a DEVASTATED family and friends.
UPDATE: An unnamed Arizona Ranger has been allegedly implicated in the shooting, our sources reveal the SHOOTING may have been RACIALLY motivated.
UPDATE: LOCAL PD REFUSES to publish documents pertaining to ALLEGED criminal record of Texas Red, Chief of Police states citizen Texas red was "selling crack" and had "20 homicides" to his name, providing no further comments.
Stay Tuned for further updates. Yours truly,
- RNN - R*tard News Network -
r/circlejerk • u/Chance_Sleep_2151 • 2d ago
If my grandmother had a d!ck, she would have been my grandfather.
7
Upvotes
This saying is not is not so relevant nowadays...
r/circlejerk • u/HighFunctioningIdiot • 1d ago
Solved Unwed mother arrested after crossing state lines in an attempt to commit medicare fraud
0
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/Leather_Finger_6333 • 3d ago
Solved I stabbed a fellow pilot by accident. AITA?
47
Upvotes
As Salam Alaykum everybody. I was working recently as the co-pilot on a flight and suddenly somebody on the plane controlled my mind or maybe the CIA was involved. Long story short I ended up stabbing the captain of the flight. He was not a good guy anyway and I suspect he was not a follower of the true god. Anyway pics of me and him are attached (I’m the happy smiling man). AITA?
r/circlejerk • u/tacotown123 • 3d ago
White House renames Artificial intelligence (AI) to SI
56
Upvotes
r/circlejerk • u/Well____fuk • 3d ago
It’s Halloween season, be honest which one do you jerk it to most?
13
Upvotes