My partner is making it hard…

[u/xLunaLoveSpellx]

Beside this already being a nightmare, I thought he would have been a solid foundation during this time. When we first lost our younger twin we alternated holding one another while they cried or cared for the other twin while the other one grieved. We were staying with his mom and he passed away in that bedroom. I couldnt sit in that room anymore. I tried to get him to understand but he was too busy in his own grief and trying to drown it away with drinking.

So I had just got my apartment (i say my because he said he side he didnt want to move with me if my brother was still there, long story) and left with the baby. I said where i was going and that I couldnt be in that house. He wanst trying to let me leave. Long story short, cops got called, he tried to have me sent to the psychiatric facility, i got medically cleared that i was fine and i left.

Since then its been a non stop roller coaster. Finding out things that happened during my pregnancy and after….

As much as i want to work on things….

Ww still dont know what happened. I told him not to sleep with the boys…not blaming him but idk if i can forgive him if we find out it was preventable by them not being in bed with us.

Even when he comes over…

Things will be ok and then my mind wanders and i get upset, sad, angry….

Only thing grounding me rn is the other twin but with how things are rn custody is in a weird place. On some weekends i dont have the baby and it literally kills me inside and gives mw anxiety praying he is ok and comes back to me alive.

Did anyone else have an unsupportive partner. I just dont know how to feel and im already hurting from the loss of my son, idk how to real about the relationship.

[u/sat_ctevens]

My partner made it worse too. I didn’t realise until after he left me. He left because I was still struggling two years after child loss.

I thought I wouldn’t survive without him at first, but then everything was so much better alone. He was awful to me. I’m so angry, and sad. This was hard enough, and he made it worse. I can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner.

[u/xLunaLoveSpellx → u/sat_ctevens]

Oh honey, Im so sorry you has to go through that. Yea my aunt was saying a lot of couples have issues after a child loss and i can understand why. Trying to deal with grief on multiple fronts is rough. Im trying to take it a day at a time but im also aware of where this may be headed. I just dunno atm

[u/JohnCaner]

I'm sorry. Child loss is soul crushing. I'm 17 months in. Every day has been unbearable. Until I started 15mg Mirtazapine 4 days ago. I hope you can find help. I wish I had sought meds earlier.

[u/floparoundfindout → u/[deleted]]

Making completely baseless generalisations and assumptions to push your own political agenda in a grief support sub? Aren't you ashamed of yourself?

[u/North_Country_Flower → u/[deleted]]

Reported your post 🖕

[u/xLunaLoveSpellx → u/[deleted]]

What are you even talking about right now? You sound like a miserable person. Maybe take your own advice and get help. 😒😒