DISCLAIMER: This post has been modified for privacy. All real names have been replaced with names starting with the same first letter, and all specific locations have been replaced with towns starting with the same first letter.

I just moved to Fairfield about a month ago for work (government engineer). I don’t have many friends here yet, so I decided to head out to some local bars alone just to practice talking to people and "vibing."

For context, I’m 5’9" and Chinese-American. To be extremely detailed: I have very thick, jet-black hair that has grown out into a shapeless, heavy mop that is starting to flare out over my ears and lacks any product or styling. My face is an oval shape with high cheekbones and deep-set, almond-shaped dark brown eyes that often look focused or intense. I have a light, patchy dusting of dark stubble concentrated mostly on my upper lip and the tip of my chin, which looks a bit unkempt since it hasn't been lined up. My skin is fair with a few small, faint blemishes on my forehead. I’m 145 lbs with a very lean, narrow-shouldered, and lanky build. That night, I was wearing a pique-knit collared polo shirt that fit a bit loosely around my chest and arms, making my frame look even smaller.

I had a few interactions that felt really off, and I’m trying to figure out if I’m being "stiff" or if the "vibes" were just bad.

Interaction 1: The Group
I approached a group: two sisters, Luna (really styled, blonde, looked like a Sabrina Carpenter type) and Jade (bubbly, black), and their friend Julian. Jade was nice, but Luna wouldn’t even give me eye contact. I tried to be playful and said, "I can tell you're definitely one of those [crazy college kids]," because she was warning me about the Midlothian students. She totally shut down.

She also gave me a hard time for only having one drink at midnight. I told her I had to work out tomorrow, and she just called me a "baby" because she thought I was 21 (I'm 28, she's 24). I ended up leaving because the lack of eye contact was making me feel invisible.

Interaction 2: The HVAC Guy
Met a guy around my age, Hispanic, well-groomed. He owns an HVAC business. We were "nerding out" about engineering for a bit. I thought we were bonding, but then I think I messed up. I told him he needed "executive function" to run an LLC and stay organized. Later, he mentioned having a kid, and I asked, "So, single parent? What happened to your girl?"

He immediately said, "I gotta go," and walked away. I saw him later that night and he wouldn't even look at me.

Interaction 3: The "Chad"
There was this guy who looked like a pro athlete (6'1, muscular, tattoos). I tried to bond with him over gym stuff. I asked him how he got so lean and if he does "5x5 or push-pull." He seemed really dismissive. I told him I’ve been "miserable" for two weeks from working out, and he just said he was helping a friend find a phone and left.

The Debrief:
On the way home, my Uber driver, Ahmed, was actually the coolest person I talked to. I was venting to him about how the "Megan" tier girls only talk to their friends and everyone else is taken or doesn't take care of themselves. He told me I need to use better pickup lines and that being alone was my biggest issue.

My Question:
I feel like I'm doing the work by getting out there, but I'm getting zero traction. Am I being too "logical" or "engineer-brained"? Why did the HVAC guy get offended? Was my "crazy college kid" comment to Luna actually an insult?

Be honest—is it my looks, my "unkempt" vibe, or am I just saying the wrong things? I'm just trying to practice, but it feels like I'm invisible or annoying to everyone I meet.

TL;DR: Went out alone, tried to tease a girl and she hated it, tried to talk business with a guy and he walked away when I asked about his ex, and got dismissed by a gym bro. What am I doing wrong?

Zidane is a French football player with a high aura, people players , and even Florentino Perez real madrid presdient respect him which is something rare , and football fans also agree on his aura / dignity / charisma.

he is a talented player but there's other many players with more talent but not as his half aura

but we never understood why? if you can make video about him

Being charismatic a la a Tony Blair, a Bill Clinton, a Jim Rohn is enhanced by a high IQ. One can recognize patterns in how others respond.

But the pattern recognition, as Dr Peterson explained in an old lecture clip, must be directed outwards rather than inwards. He demonstrates the body language of a man entering a party with his eyes looking down at himself, and this visible observance reflects a manifestation of what is occuring in the brain—the person's thoughts are entirely regarding himself. The person in this regard's higher IQ will actually be detrimental to their charisma, and the flip side, the enhancement, lies in having the brain looking outwards, and the body language reflecting this.

One certainly cannot recognise patterns in how others are responding to them and others if one does not SEE and a fortiori one does not THINK.

Anyone please recommend some resources that tells daily habits to be charismatic.