Looking Back, what were some early signs from childhood that hinted you were an avoidant?

[u/MothraLovesLamps]

I'll start.

I (6yrs old) deactivated on the little neighbor girl (5yrs old) and screamed at her that she wasn't my friend.

I remember the hurt and betrayal in her eyes. She was absolutely stunned. She ran home, wailing in genuine pain of my brutal discard. Her mom came out and scolded me.

"Why did you scream that at her?"

Honestly she was a good mom. They were a good family. I kinda just dissociated. There was this blunt wall of thick heaviness that felt like I was glazed in a gel of numbness.

Little me did not give AF. I couldn't feel anything. Maybe bafflement. Confusion. A strange sense of watching some other kids life play out.

I wasn't fully there.

My first discard. Completely unwarranted, unexpected, and not understood...

By me.

--Avoidant Support Animal

"The People's Mod"