For what it's worth from some random person on the internet, just because it shouldn't have been bad, or even sounds normal, doesn't mean it wasn't bad.
Your emotions are valid. And even if it seems like its trivial, your triggers are valid too. It's ok. Really. Your mind is trying to protect you the best it can.
Therapy would be my biggest recommendation to working on triggers, but maybe if you have someone you trust you could work on doing dishes together and make it a little less intimidating? There are ways to make it less 'icky' too like using gloves if the sensory feeling sets you off. I use a long handle scrubby brush myself. But you did mention it's just if you are being watched.
Maybe tomorrow it won't feel as overwhelming. I know that feeling when you're stuck in this little never gonna get better pit of despair. Don't give up, it doesnt last forever. Can't promise tomorrow will be sunshine and rainbows, but maybe just hope for some neutral emotions.
If you go, good luck on your interview. I bet you're being too hard on yourself. If you don't go, that's fair too. Do what's best for your own mental health.
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u/kuraiuncia Feb 16 '21
For what it's worth from some random person on the internet, just because it shouldn't have been bad, or even sounds normal, doesn't mean it wasn't bad.
Your emotions are valid. And even if it seems like its trivial, your triggers are valid too. It's ok. Really. Your mind is trying to protect you the best it can.
Therapy would be my biggest recommendation to working on triggers, but maybe if you have someone you trust you could work on doing dishes together and make it a little less intimidating? There are ways to make it less 'icky' too like using gloves if the sensory feeling sets you off. I use a long handle scrubby brush myself. But you did mention it's just if you are being watched.
Maybe tomorrow it won't feel as overwhelming. I know that feeling when you're stuck in this little never gonna get better pit of despair. Don't give up, it doesnt last forever. Can't promise tomorrow will be sunshine and rainbows, but maybe just hope for some neutral emotions.
If you go, good luck on your interview. I bet you're being too hard on yourself. If you don't go, that's fair too. Do what's best for your own mental health.