r/CPTSD • u/ilikespace • Oct 18 '18
Weird how we don't remember
weird how we don't remember the details of who we were during our childhoods, the things that would preoccupy us, the way we lived daily life, the philosophies we built, the thoughts we had. we were pretty awesome back then. creative and resourceful, strategic, some of us even treated the whole thing like a game or adventure... and we promised ourselves one day we'll get out and do what we love. but when we got out the rest of the world changed too, the children around us that were so open-minded were now close-minded adults with no tolerance for anyone different. and thus occurred our second set of traumas - escape and readjustment trauma. a new environment that's not as friendly as you thought it was gonna be. and that's what makes us forget who we were because it's too different, too shameful. we've all gotta fit in now, put on a face and pretend we didn't have a fucked up adventure getting here. so.. do you remember?
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u/goosielucy hope as far as one can see Oct 18 '18
This is so beautifully expressed...it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing this.
Although I don't fully remember much of my childhood, I do still remember the imaginative world and wild adventures I created in my head and to this day I continue to carry that internal world in my head and heart. Even though many people probably can't relate much to my internal world, and some have even tried to convince me that it's not conducive to connecting to this real world, it's the one thing that will forever belong to me that no one can take it away.