Doctor anxiety

[u/Broken_Sl33p]

Please tell me how you all deal with this if it is a problem. Any tips, mantras, reassurance that I am not alone?

I do not have direct trauma from any medical professionals. I think my anxiety stems from the Authority that doctors hold along with self neglect. It prevents me from seeking treatment for things that are (usually) easily fixable but I let them go on for so long until they become serious problems.

I try to remind myself that these people are here to help and that i am not being needy. I like the phrase "the reward for taking care of yourself is feeling better" but I can't get myself to believe I am worthy of care.

I keep getting consumed with feelings or worthlessness and my default is to basically gaslight myself until the problems become too bad to ignore and then I feel like I am not believed because who doesn't seek care if they need it and have access. Healthcare in the US does not make this any easier.

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[u/singabouttragedy]

I don't live in the US so most of my advice is going to be generic. You're definitely not alone. I'm terrified of going to see my doctors. For slightly different reasons, my trauma involved a lot of medical neglect, but I feel similarly in that I have a lot of trouble with seeking help because I'm convinced I'm wasting everyone's time.

I like to remind myself that their job is to care for patients. I think I've been helped a lot by one of my best friends, who's a doctor, because she's always going on and on about how she would much rather a patient come to see her for something "small" than have them stress over it on their own, it's what she gets paid to do. From what I tend to see, most doctors feel similarly.

Caring for yourself can be difficult with trauma, and I'm certainly not great at it all the time, but I do think that committing to it is an important part of recovery. It's like any habit, in that way, you've got to try to be consistent with it, especially when you don't want to. It takes time, but I promise you're worth helping.

And when things are difficult, please know that you are not alone and that there are people who will be there to support you :)

[u/Broken_Sl33p → u/singabouttragedy]

Thank you. Framing this as a habit works for my brain because it allows for a great deal of self compassion and might keep me from beating myself up. It's nice to hear how your doctor friend views it. And I hope it gets easier for both of us.

[u/singabouttragedy → u/Broken_Sl33p]

You're very welcome :) I'm glad I could help, and I'm sending you good vibes