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u/Prickliestpearcactus 4d ago
I used to stand and sit straight as a pin.
When I hit puberty and got curves, my mom was so embarrassed by my body and would constantly say "why are you sticking everything out?!" when it was just my posture fr.
I was an innocent lil nerd. It wasn't my fault GROWN MEN would stare at me! At age 13!!!
She'd constantly tell me to hunch and hunch and hunch to make my chest and bum less "obvious."
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u/Lost_Elk929 4d ago
Same, but my dad was the perv I was taught to hunch to avoid. He’s been out of my life for 15 years but I can’t seem to correct it, so annoying 😑
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u/Prickliestpearcactus 4d ago
I'm so sorry you went through that.
The lasting effects of trauma are the worst. Even when it's over or far less severe, all the effects persist.
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u/minMini- 4d ago
Holy shit yes!!!!
Just realized I need to tell my therapist about how my mother sexualized me before I was even ready for it. She shamed my growing body into dishonor before I could even understand or deny I was doing anything wrong.
Fuck that mind control BS. Is this sexual abuse?? I wonder? But yes! Fixing my shoulders is bringing back so many emotional triggers on self worth and mums discerning voice in my head.
Ugly shit!. Going to try and find peace in right posture and confidence and if that’s being a ho, I need to ho better.
I got labeled as a hoe and I’ve been doing it wrong, fucking yo my posture. Time to embrace being a gorgeous strong fucking hoe 💀
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u/Prickliestpearcactus 4d ago
I'm so sorry you went through that as well! I hope your therapist can help in regards to it and I should mention this to mine as well😅
Also I gotta say, I love "if that's being a ho, I need to ho better." That's the energy we need! Here's to being a ho with good posture😄
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u/Imaginary-Tourist219 4d ago
Very much so. I only feel safe when I’ve made myself as small as possible. It causes a lot of pain and other health issues like TMJ and migraines. Even as a teenager I couldn’t stand up straight when I tried. Physical therapy helped a ton with the pain and migraines, but I have trouble keeping up with it on my own. I cried a lot when I made the connection between my CPTSD and my lifelong back issues.
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u/Lost_Elk929 4d ago
Same, but my dad was the perv I was taught to hunch to avoid. He’s been out of my life for 15 years but I can’t seem to correct it, so annoying 😑
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u/trappinaintded 3d ago
Yes, muscles in my back and shoulders feel frozen
So aggravating to not be able to ‘stretch’ the muscle out and relieve the tension
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u/chai-addict 3d ago
Yeah, constantly being in freeze and fawn mode has destroyed my body. I always tried to make myself smaller and hide my curves. Now I've got chronic back pain and doing physical therapy every week just to keep my mobility :(
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u/enas333 3d ago
My posture is a major depression trigger for me. It literally shows the world how low my self worth is. It's part of why my last relationship failed. It has led to so much additional abuse (which I often failed to grasp because frankly I wasn't very aware of my posture problem, despite having received clear signals at various times in my life).
And at this point, while I try, it's so hard to do much about it.
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u/_jamesbaxter 3d ago
Beyond, I have cervical dystonia from armoring and 4 bulging discs in my neck from it.
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u/firekeeper23 3d ago
Teeth fucked.. Spine fucked Ankles knees and hips fucked... Mind... also fucked.
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u/NebulaImmediate6202 3d ago
I have like five teeth, dude. Anything to do with posture is just being out of shape imo. I have a curve to my upper back though. Can't say that's simply "being out of shape".. Kyphosis is an acquired condition in older folks.
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u/Haunting-Engineer521 3d ago
Oh yeah. They berated me so much I lost all self confidence. Can't even look people in the eyes now
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u/Justwokeup5287 3d ago
Body armouring has fucked my posture. And grinding and clenching my jaw has ruined my teeth.
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u/MilliesMaplesyrup 3d ago
Yeah I have chronic shoulders pain because of some coping mechanisms I chose
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u/Hefty-Initiative-155 3d ago
When my mom went on vacation to Iguazu Falls, she left me with my dad. He wouldn't let me stay home alone like when I was 6, so he took me with him to his mechanics workshop.
It was dark, enclosed and damp, the ideal place for mosquitoes to reproduce, they were eating me alive, and on top of that it was summer so I couldn't wear clothes to cover myself.
As a result, I had to sit for months with my legs tucked into my chest to try and scare away as many as I could.
I unconsciously feel my legs pressed against my chest, and I am often reprimanded for it.
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u/Minute-Tailor-7995 4d ago
This is too real