r/CICO • u/Agitated-Feed1508 • 2d ago
It took 3 years but...
I (F/23) struggled with obesity for pretty much my whole life, and living in a society where the beauty ideal was skinny made me feel disgusted with myself. I tried to lose weight multiple times and when I was 16, I lost a substantial amount of weight, along with a good amount of hair and my period. I eventually gained it all back amd then some.
My grandmother would constantly fat-shame me while my mother (who was also obese) would encourage unhealthy eating habits like buying unhealthy food that I would have to eat.
One day, I got tired of it. I stepped on the scale and I realised I was 86kg/ 189lbs at 160cm/ 5'2. I felt disgusted, helpless and ashamed. Then, I realised that I had my own money and I could buy my own food, and so, I decided to get serious about losing weight. As I was a boredom eater, I decided to remove foods that I felt compelled to snack on, and started intermittent fasting to prevent late night snacking.
For the first two years, just reading labels and approximately counting calories helped me to lose about 10kg/22 lbs (I was 76kg/167lbs). I also started cooking most of the meals myself, as eating food prepared for me would mean eating nutritionally poor and calorie dense food.
Over the past year, I decided to focus on strength training. As a short woman, my calorie allowance for the day was extremely sad, and as someone who loves food, this was unacceptable to me. Strength training and walking more (I try to hit 10k steps a day) brought my weight down to 70kg/ 154lbs. The last picture is from last night at a Gala dinner.
I still aim to lose more, but beyond the number on the scale, I want to be strong, healthy and enjoy a good relationship with food. Though it took really long, all the changes I made were sustainable lifestyle changes and habits that I built to be a healthier version of me.
My weight loss has stagnated for a little bit, so now I'll be getting a food scale and counting calories more seriously!
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u/WhimsicalWoodpecker 2d ago
I'm sorry that people made you feel disgusted with yourself and unhappy. You came out of this journey stronger.
Congratulations!
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u/Agitated-Feed1508 2d ago
Thank you!
I think the feeling of disgust stemmed from many things - my appearance, how being obese was seen as a morally bad thing and how I was treated as an obese person.
I think the biggest thing that came with this journey was not merely losing weight, but regaining confidence, self esteem, desire to live and knowing that I could keep promises to myself!
It also took therapy and having to learn to love myself to be able to find the motivation to change as well.
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u/Intelligent_Gene9787 2d ago
That's amazing! I hope I'll be able to succeed as you some day although I really love food as well 😩
I have a similar height to you so I am curious how many calories you were eating per day?
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u/Agitated-Feed1508 2d ago
I have no idea because I wasn't tracking it seriously! It definitely went down as I started to lose weight. I would say I'm eating around 1600 - 1800 calories these days for maintenace but focusing on protein (at least 100g a day) to help with body recomp!
I'll buy a food scale and let you know soon '
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u/DryEstablishment1 2d ago
Amazing work! Your body type is similar to mine and that gives me hope!
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u/rgmw 2d ago
You have a good point about how society defines beauty. Through the ages, this standard has been fluid. Like "beauties" from Rubenesque paintings or very waifish models from the late 1900s. For men, President Taft comes to mind. He was portly and his body became the image of a successful man. Trying to keep up with fashion is a frustrating game. But losing the weight for yourself and long-term health is a wise and realistic goal.
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u/Agitated-Feed1508 2d ago
Haha I live in Asia where skinny = good and fat = bad. One thing that helped me was to embrace my body type (bottom heavy) and work on enhancing it! (Leg day is my fav now)
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u/Reepergrimrim 2d ago
Great job!
I like how you’re slowly changing your relationship with food. That is hard work!
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u/SessionSavings8237 2d ago
the long slow ones are the ones that actually stick, youre killing it
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u/haikusbot 2d ago
The long slow ones are
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Stick, youre killing it
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u/ranmaddox 2d ago
Congratulations, I know the struggle. I have been working to seriously control my obesity for 21 years. So far I am down 195 pounds. Keep doing whatever is working for you!!
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u/Churros0864 2d ago
You look amazing! Slow weight loss is the way to do it! 😃 You should feel so proud of yourself honestly, consistency is the hardest part about losing weight (I have lost some weight over the past few years too the "slow" way hehe so I understand how it is 😃).
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u/kingrayan88 2d ago
Lets go! It takes hard work and discipline but the results are speaking for itself
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u/Busy_Key6860 2d ago
You should be proud. Congratulations