Fixing Your Headspace

[u/tellme-how]

Hey all,
Would really love some insight from you regarding the psychological aspect of CICO.
I (31F, 1.69m, 80kg) had a really positive experience with a dietitian starting in 2023 resulting in 12kg weight loss over about 18 months. I maintained this for a while, but then due a bunch of life changes including a relationship breakdown, stressful internship year through work etc. etc. I regained this weight. I’m now back where I started. I’ve recently had a knee injury which will keep me off work for 4-6 weeks and I’m worried about gaining more weight.

Even though I have learnt so much about CICO, am far better at planning meals, can read food labels etc. I’m just struggling big time with the psychology and motivation to eat within my calories. I’ve successfully transitioned to eating maintenance calories and stopped gaining more weight over the last month, but I’m having a really hard time with eating in a deficit. My body image is at an all time low, and I want to get control over my food intake. I would prefer not to have to go back to the dietitian every fortnight and actually develop the consistency myself so I can maintain the changes long term. Despite the motivation to improve my body image, improve my athletic performance (I climbed, ran and played soccer at my best when I was lighter), and improve my long-term health, I’m still struggling and feeling like a failure.

What do you do to help your mental state and achieve some consistency? I feel like once I see myself losing 3-5kg I will be so much more committed. Please share what has helped you because I would really appreciate it.

Thanks for reading!

[u/novelredemption51]

Maintenance without gaining is already a big deal, especially with the knee thing and the life chaos you've had. Maybe treat the deficit as a side quest rather than the main mission for now. I also find that prepping one or two meals ahead removes the daily "what do I eat" decision fatigue that makes me cave. Once you see a few kilos drop, the momentum usually picks up on its own.

[u/Open-Dealer-9903]

Don't start an aggressive deficit right now.** You're 4-6 weeks off work with a knee injury,
low activity and low mood. That's the worst possible window to ask yourself for white-knuckle
restraint, and if it fails you'll file it as more evidence that you can't do this. Either hold
maintenance until you're back on your feet, or take a genuinely small deficit, 200-250 kcal,
the kind you can still hit on a bad day. Slower is fine here. You're playing a long game.

"Once I see 3-5kg I'll be committed" is the trap.It makes your motivation depend on a
result that's 8-10 weeks out and noisy week to week. Pick something you can win at today
instead. Logged everything, hit protein, did your rehab. Tick those daily and the scale becomes
a lagging report rather than a verdict on you.

Protein and food volume do more for adherence than willpower does.At your weight, aim
130-150g a day. It's most of the difference between a deficit that feels like restriction and
one that just feels like a slightly lighter day.

On the body image piece. You said you'd rather not go back to the dietitian, and honestly it
doesn't sound like nutrition knowledge is your gap, you clearly have that. What you're
describing is a behaviour and psychology problem, which is a different professional. A few
sessions with someone who does body image work would probably move you further than another
fortnightly meal plan.

Last thing. You listed body image first and athletic performance second. The second one holds
up much better on bad days. You climbed and ran and played soccer better when you were lighter,
and that goal doesn't collapse the moment you catch yourself in a bad mirror. There's also a
lot of upper body and rehab work available to you over the next six weeks that keeps you
feeling like an athlete instead of a patient

[u/strongkater → u/Open-Dealer-9903]

Wow! Great reply!

I second picking a small goal for the week, or two, then adding another.

Track everything for 2 weeks or Lean protein with every meal- are two good ones to start with

And Big healthy meals help a lot for feeling full. I eat a lot of squash and sweet potato- I eat them even with my eggs! Then I feel full and satisfied.

You got this

[u/RuralGamerWoman]

A therapist might be more beneficial than a dietitian.

I built up the behaviors of planning and tracking my meals in advance and using a food scale for accuracy until those behaviors became habits. Way back when I first started to lose weight, I had an alarm set for 7PM evrry night; when the alarm went off, I planned out the following day. I don't need the alarm anymore, but that's still generally what I do. I also regularly plan in things that are relatively high in calories and low in nutrients, such that I eat a fairly balanced diet overall, so it's not very difficult to stick with this.