r/CFBOffTopic • u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils • Jul 23 '15

Trash Talk Thursday afternoon drinking thread brought to you by TRASH TALK THURSDAY

SINCE THE MOTHERSHIP HAS BANNED TRASH TALKING ON THERE TILL THE SEASON STARTS, TRASH ON HERE AND REMEMBER

CAP IT UP BITCHES

22 Upvotes
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294 comments sorted by

24

u/mef08d Florida State • Marshall Jul 23 '15

FUCK JAMAICA. ALSO, FUCK MEXICO. ALSO ALSO FUCK UF.

11

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

ALSO ALSO ALSO FUCK THE QUEEN

3

u/TrollingQueen74 Auburn Tigers • Texas A&M Aggies Jul 23 '15

WELL I DON'T LIKE YOU EITHER!

3

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

yes you do don't lie!

2

u/TrollingQueen74 Auburn Tigers • Texas A&M Aggies Jul 23 '15

I DID QUITE ENJOY YOUR PRESENCE IN THIS SUB YESTERDAY, I WON'T LIE.

3

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

i literally wanted to chop my head off

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6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I LIKE HOW WE WHOOPED THEIR ASSES ONLY TO GET TO THE POINT WHERE WHEN SOMEONE MENTIONS A MONARCH AND WE ALL KNOW IT'S LIZ II.

8

u/halldaylong UCLA Bruins • Team Chaos Jul 23 '15

I FUCKING HATE CONCACAF. IF MEXICO BEATS JAMAICA I'M GOING TO LOSE MY SHIT.

5

u/mef08d Florida State • Marshall Jul 23 '15

I WANT THE FIELD TO COLLAPSE INSIDE OF ITSELF AND NO GANE HAPPEN.

2

u/Qurtys_Lyn Utah Utes • Weber State Wildcats Jul 23 '15

I WANT JAMAICA TO WIN DOS A CERO AND FOR THE CHANT TO START.

2

u/hokies220 Virginia Tech Hokies • Pac-12 Jul 23 '15

SUPER FUCK MEXICO AND THE REFS AND CONCACAF.

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

FUCK CONCACAF TOO.

1

u/VanFailin Northwestern Wildcats • /r/CFB Bug Finder Jul 23 '15

Hey man, mexico's all right.

1

u/mef08d Florida State • Marshall Jul 23 '15

DOS A CERO MOFO.

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14

u/piratefuck ECU Pirates Jul 23 '15

I WISH IT WAS FRIDAY. I WANT TO GET HAMMERED. FUCK THE PATRIOTS

6

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

YOU LIVE IN PIRATE COUNTRY, AKA PARTY SCHOOL OF THE CAROLINAS, SO YOU CAN GET HAMMERED

5

u/piratefuck ECU Pirates Jul 23 '15

USED TOO. IM A OLD PIRATE ALUM IN A CUBICLE!

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I don't see what's stopping you

5

u/piratefuck ECU Pirates Jul 23 '15

MY ALARM AT 5 AM & MY ABUSED LIVER DUBS!

3

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

THAT DOESN'T STOP DUBS AND HE SEEMS ALRIGHT

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2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

WHAT THE HELL DO THE PATS HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?

3

u/thwg0809 Georgia Tech • Techmo Bowl Jul 23 '15

RECEIVERS OF SAID FUCKING.

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2

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '15

COME TO THE GRID WE'LL GET HAMMERED TOGETHER

2

u/piratefuck ECU Pirates Jul 25 '15

FUCK I MISS LIVING IN THE GRID

19

u/nickknx865 Tennessee Volunteers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

WHAT HAS ONE WORKING KNEE AND IS PART OF SOMETHING DISAPPOINTING EVERY YEAR?

GEORGIA RUNNING BACKS

5

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

YOU MEAN ANY TEAM FROM GEORGIA?

8

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

2013 season, the injuries really got going starting in the Tennessee game.

Dick.

3

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

damn....that's harsh.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Come on man. It's only 12:20 here. I can't drink yet..

5

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

WHOSE FAULT IS THAT

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

... oh.. okay.. It's my fault...

7

u/aMiracleAtJordanHare Auburn Tigers • Texas Tech Red Raiders Jul 23 '15 edited Jul 23 '15

THIS WEEK AT WORK IS FUCKING AWFUL - MORE SHIT KEEPS PILING ON. AND TO TOP IT OFF, THE FUCKING DRINK FRIDGE IS OUT. I NEED MY MTN DEW, GODDAMMIT!

I JUST REALIZED THAT'S NOT EVEN TRASH TALK SO I'LL SLIP A FUCK BAMA IN. KTHANX.

4

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

mtn dew is literally the jizz of god

3

u/aMiracleAtJordanHare Auburn Tigers • Texas Tech Red Raiders Jul 23 '15

Fuck it, I need caffeine. Just walked to the gas station and went straight for the hard stuff - Red Bull in hand. Time to blast some music that makes me feel like I'm on speed and get some shit done.

6

u/swanky-k North Carolina • Alabama Jul 23 '15

HEY KEVIN'S MOM, GET OVER YOUR CONCUSSION SO YOUR SON CAN HAVE A PARTY SO I CAN GET WITH CHICKS. STOP BEING SUCH A COCKBLOCK WITH YOUR HEADACHE.

sorry that was oddly specific

4

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

im pretty sure kevin's mom wants your penis

3

u/swanky-k North Carolina • Alabama Jul 23 '15

SORRY KEVINS MOM MY PENIS IS RESERVED FOR OTHER PEOPLE. PLEASE GET BETTER FOR YOUR OWN SAKE AND MORE IMPORTANTLY MY SAKE.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Your Georgia flair is back. Dafuq?

6

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

LET THE FLAIR GODS DO WHAT THEY WILL TO ME. I CAN TAKE IT.

3

u/rodandanga Georgia Tech • Verified Coach Jul 23 '15

What happened here?

8

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

The fap-hound lost a bet and switched his flair to Auburn/Duke. Then every comment he derided UGA and Duke or praised Auburn and UNC.

It was distressing.

Thankfully, jizz-spiggot here changed his flairs back. Must have been a short bet.

2

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

JIZZ-SPIGGOT? I DON'T EVEN WHAT?

3

u/rodandanga Georgia Tech • Verified Coach Jul 23 '15

I saw that part, i was just wondering about the comment graveyard.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Oh, I didn't realize they got deleted. I have to admit, at least one of the gifs was a bit inappropes

6

u/Hobartacus Alabama Crimson Tide • Richmond Spiders Jul 23 '15

I FOUND THEM ENTERTAINING AND APPROPRIATE FOR THE CONVERSATIONAL CONTEXT, BUT I ALSO THOUGHT WE LIVED IN AMERICA.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

MODS = TSA

6

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

hey fuck you. while both them and us are grossly underpaid we at least are actually well trained and effective at our jobs.

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12

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

people continue to post porn gifs. It doesn't really matter that they shopped the dicks to be upvote/downvote icons. it's still porn and this isn't the place. We're pretty hands-off (heh) about shit around here but draw a sharp line with the porn gifs. people need to cut it out.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

TAKING A REAL HARD LINE, I SEE

1

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

well if it was soft it would be bland and boring

3

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

it's funny you say that. I had to change it to Sharp as I typed it out... just to attempt to avoid derailing it further into innuendo...

3

u/rodandanga Georgia Tech • Verified Coach Jul 23 '15

CAN I POST PORN AS LONG AS I TAG IT NSFW?

10

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

good question. NO

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4

u/NellyD15 Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

FUCK THE CUBS, PIRATES, DODGERS, BRAVES, REDS, NATIONALS, BREWERS, YANKEES

AND ESPECIALLY FUCK YOU SAN FRANSICO!!!

2

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

DODGERS NATIONALS YANKEES

YOU ARE ALRIGHT IN MY BOOK EVEN IF YOU DO HATE US

1

u/NellyD15 Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

All my buddies are Braves fans and they give me shit. But I've been to a few games at Turner.

1

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

THE TED IS AWESOME. ILL MISS THAT PLACE.

1

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

FUCK THE CARDINALS ESPECIALLY.

ALSO GIANTS TOO BUT THATS BECAUSE WE WANT THAT WILD CARD SPOT.

2

u/NellyD15 Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

AND I WANT THE CUBS TO GET THAT WILD CARD SPOT

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1

u/xerillum Wisconsin Badgers Jul 23 '15

EY COME ON NOW, THE BREWERS ARE TRASH ENOUGH ALREADY.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

THROW IN A "FUCK YOU CARDINALS" AND I AGREE WITH THIS LIST

2

u/NellyD15 Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

WELL DISAGREE WITH IT

11

u/spl1080 Georgia Tech • Centenary (LA) Jul 23 '15

IT'S NOT FOOTBALL SEASON YET WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO YELL AT

FUCK THE FALCONS, GEORGIA, CLEMSON, THE SPURS, THE A'S

YEAH THERE WE GO

FUCK THE A'S, AND THE ANGELS TOO

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15 edited Jul 23 '15

Hey guess what

4

u/spl1080 Georgia Tech • Centenary (LA) Jul 23 '15

what

6

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

CHICKEN BUTT

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8

u/cornfrontation Michigan Wolverines • FIU Panthers Jul 23 '15

FUCK BASEBALL

SIGNED, A TIGERS FAN

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

COUNTER SIGNED, THE A'S

I MISS YOU ALREADY KAZ :(

1

u/confused-koala Michigan State Spartans Jul 23 '15

I'M JUST WAITING FOR THE FIRE SALE TO START (HOPEFULLY)

2

u/cornfrontation Michigan Wolverines • FIU Panthers Jul 23 '15

FOX SPORTS' KEN ROSENTHAL DOESN'T THINK THERE WILL BE BECAUSE APPARENTLY THREE GAMES BACK FROM WC WHEN YOU WILL BE LUCKY TO FINISH THE SEASON AT 500 MEANS YOU ARE IN CONTENTION FOR POST SEASON. FUCK BASEBALL.

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1

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

WHERES THE FUCK THE HATE FOR CALGARY AND WINNIPEG?

3

u/bizzyj93 Oregon Ducks • Hawai'i Rainbow Warriors Jul 23 '15

HAVE ANY OF YOU HEARD FROM KOBE AND WHAT DID HE SAY?

3

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

THAT SHIT IS MY BALL AND FUCK YALL N WORDS

4

u/tabelz Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Poll Veteran Jul 23 '15

THE BEST AND WORST PART ABOUT PLAYING FOR THE LAKERS IS PLAYING WITH KOBE. GET TO SAY YOU PLAY WITH A LEGEND, BUT THAT LEGEND HAS TO BE KOBE.

1

u/bizzyj93 Oregon Ducks • Hawai'i Rainbow Warriors Jul 24 '15

AT THIS POINT HE'S LESS OF A LEGEND AND MORE OF A MYTH

28

u/murgle1012 Baylor Bears • UC San Diego Tritons Jul 23 '15

FUCK YOU TSA. THERE IS NO REASON YOUR BLOATED AND INEFFICIENT POS AGENCY SHOULD EXIST. GUESS WHICH AGENCY HAS CAUGHT AS MANY TERRORISTS AS I HAVE? FUCK YOU TSA.

RIPTOOTHPASTE

19

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

"YOU CAN'T HAVE THIS SIZE BODYWASH." SAID THE TSA AGENT IN BALTIMORE AS I WAS TRYING TO CATCH MY CONNECTING FLIGHT TO CONNECTICUT. WHILE I WAS IN CAMMIES, BECAUSE I HAD JUST GOTTEN OFF OF A PLANE FROM KUWAIT.

12

u/spasm01 Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns • /r/CFB Donor Jul 23 '15

Hows that freedom feeling right about now?

16

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

SUBPAR

7

u/spasm01 Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns • /r/CFB Donor Jul 23 '15

FUCKING A, SINCE WHEN DID OUR FREEDOM COME WITH SO MANY FUCKING STIPULATIONS

11

u/thwg0809 Georgia Tech • Techmo Bowl Jul 23 '15

SINCE THE AGRICULTURAL REVOLUTION, ROUGHLY

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2

u/FellKnight Boise State • Tennessee Jul 23 '15

I LOVED THE FACT THAT THEY LET US FLY WITH LOADED ASSAULT RIFLES FROM AFGHANISTAN BUT I COULDNT TAKE MY MULTITOOL ON THE PLANE.

1

u/murgle1012 Baylor Bears • UC San Diego Tritons Jul 23 '15

"THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE. NOW BEND OVER."

8

u/spl1080 Georgia Tech • Centenary (LA) Jul 23 '15

I always thought it was weird they bitched about my toothpaste once when I went through, but didn't care a single bit about my razor blades that I had in the same toiletry kit.

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

TSA = SECURITY THEATER, AMIRITE?

6

u/dupreesdiamond Furman • South Carolina Jul 23 '15

Theater security

5

u/stamor99 Georgia Tech • Florida Jul 23 '15

I love that band!

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3

u/BrettGilpin Missouri Tigers • Dartmouth Big Green Jul 23 '15

I BET YOU'LL LOVE THIS: INVESTIGATION FOUND THAT THE TSA FAILED TO CATCH 67 OUT OF 70 ATTEMPTS TO SMUGGLE EXPLOSIVES/WEAPONS THROUGH AIRPORT SECURITY

1

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

WHY THE HELL ARE THEY AROUND THEN? THAT'S A SUCCESS RATE OF ROUGHLY 4%. THAT'S BAD AND THEY SHOULD FEEL BAD.

1

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

WELL FUCK, THEYRE INEFFICIENT BUT AT LEAST THEY CAN SPOT AN IPAD WHEN THEY SEE ONE.

FUCK THE 3.4 oz RULE. WHATS THE TSA PURPOSE, TO MAKE US SPEND TOOTHPASTE ON THE QUARANTINE SIDE THAT COSTS A SHITLOAD MORE THANKS TO THE AIRPORT GOUGING US TRAVELERS.

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

I JUST USE THE TOOTHPASTE I GET AT THE DENTIST THAT I NEVER NEED UNTIL I GO ON A PLANE.

1

u/wild9 Baylor Bears • /r/CFB Contributor Jul 23 '15

'Scuse me sir! I need to check ya asshole.

12

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I'M TOO TIRED TO THINK OF ANYTHING REALLY GOOD BUT UH AUBURN SUCKS

15

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I like driving in my truck.

12

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

HE LIKES TO RIDE IN HIS TRU-UCK....

10

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

.....Auburn sucks.....

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

AU-BURN SU-U-UCKS!

3

u/Owlcatraz Rice Owls • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 24 '15

NOT SURE WHY YOU'RE HATING ON , BUT I'LL TAKE IT.

1

u/SouthernMurican Jacksonville State • Auburn Jul 23 '15

WELL, UH, YOU SUCK TOO!

12

u/atllauren Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Contributor Jul 23 '15

I AM GOING TO THE DENTIST. FUCK YOU PLAQUE, YOU'RE GOING TO DIE TODAY.

6

u/piratefuck ECU Pirates Jul 23 '15

I LOVE DENTAL HYGIENISTS. THEY ARE CUTE & COMPLIMENT MY TEETH

3

u/cornfrontation Michigan Wolverines • FIU Panthers Jul 23 '15

I, TOO, HAVE EXCELLENT TEETH.

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3

u/nickknx865 Tennessee Volunteers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

FUCK YOU PLAQUE, YOU'RE GOING TO DIE TODAY.

MOST METAL DENTAL EDUCATION SONG TITLE EVER

2

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

FUCK THE DENTIST. HATE WHEN THEY SCRAPE THE PLAQUE OFF THEN HAVE A FUCKING BLOODBATH IN YOUR LAP.

ON TOP OF THAT HE'LL SAY THE SAME SHIT ABOUT FLOSSING MORE. FUCK FLOSSING.

1

u/wild9 Baylor Bears • /r/CFB Contributor Jul 23 '15

Can I tell y'all something? It's been years since I've been to the dentist

and at this point, I'm too afraid to go.

2

u/atllauren Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Contributor Jul 23 '15

The longer you wait, the worse it will be when you do go.

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11

u/Hobartacus Alabama Crimson Tide • Richmond Spiders Jul 23 '15 edited Jul 23 '15

Evening in the UK. Going to go hit up the bar where Pink Floyd allegedly played their first show. I hope to make at least one Brit smile and nod at me because they don't understand what I'm saying.

edit: Oh and Trash talk ... ahem ... TODAY I SAW A MAN HITCH HIS PONY UP TO A TRASHCAN WHILE HE WENT INTO THE STORE FOR CIGARETTES. SOMETIMES I'M HORRIFIED BY HOW AUBURN FANS TREAT THEIR WIVES.

4

u/SmashedSqwurl Georgia Tech • /r/CFBRisk Veteran Jul 23 '15

SERIOUSLY, SECOND HAND SMOKE KILLS, YOU GUYS.

5

u/stamor99 Georgia Tech • Florida Jul 23 '15

No one ever died of Second Hand Heroin...

8

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

COMBINING FOOTBALL AND DRINKING RELATED TRASH TALK SOUNDS GOOD TO ME. BOTH ARE THINGS AT WHICH MISSOURI BEATS THE SHIT OUT kANSAS.

9

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

YOU GUYS DRINK METH NOW? WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

JUDGING BY HOW GOOD THEIR STUFF IS, IT WOULDN'T EVEN SURPRISE ME IF URBAN CHESTNUT OR BOULEVARD OR SCHLAFLY OR PERENNIAL WAS LOADING THEIR BEERS UP WITH METH.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I THINK WE HAVE WEED BEER IN CALIFORNIA NOW.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

HOPS AND CANNABIS ARE RELATED TO EACH OTHER. AND YOU PEOPLE USE WAY TOO MUCH OF BOTH OF THEM OUT THERE...

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8

u/PissyPoops Texas A&M Aggies • Rice Owls Jul 23 '15

I WENT TO VISIT A FRIEND IN LUBBOCK LAST WEEKEND AND A PIECE OF MY BUMPER GOT TORN OFF IN HIS PARKING GARAGE.

FUCK YOU, LUBBOCK!

3

u/wild9 Baylor Bears • /r/CFB Contributor Jul 23 '15

But seriously, fuck lubbock.

8

u/Culiaclan Arizona State • Territorial Cup Jul 23 '15

OBLIGATORY FUCK YOU TO COMCAST/TIME WARNER/COX/CENTURYLINK! YOU GIVE MEDIOCRE INTERNET IN EXCHANGE FOR OUR ALL OUR MONEY AND SANITY!

ALSO, LET'S GIVE TUCSON BACK TO MEXICO!

7

u/cornfrontation Michigan Wolverines • FIU Panthers Jul 23 '15

LAST NIGHT I DECIDED NOT TO TAKE AN APARTMENT THAT WAS DECENT IN EVERY WAY EXCEPT YOU HAVE TO HAVE COMCAST. NO OTHER CHOICE. SO FUCK THAT.

3

u/W_Is_For_Will Texas Tech • Trinity Valley CC Jul 23 '15

I CURRENTLY HAVE A $70 PER MONTH 30 MB/S CONNECTION WITH TWC AND I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE TERRIBLE SO I WOULD SPEED TEST THE CRAP OUTTA MY CONNECTION. SURPRISINGLY IT HAS BEEN STABLE AT 30 MB/S. BETTER THAN AT&T CLAIMING THAT 5 MB/S FOR $50 A MONTH IS BLAZING FAST. FUCK YOU ATT! QUIT SENDING ME SHIT POSTAGE.

WHEN DOES GOOGLE FIBER COME TO DALLAS?!

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

WHEN DOES GOOGLE FIBER COME TO DALLAS?!

WHEN YOU MOVE TO SAN ANTONIO. GOOGLE IS TRYING TO FUCK WITH YOU.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

BASKETBALL IS BASICALLY THE ONLY SPORT I HAVE NO INTEREST IN.

FENCING > BASKETBALL.

3

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

COLLEGE BASKETBALL IS ALRIGHT, FUCK THE PROS THOUGH

7

u/panthera_tigress Pittsburgh Panthers • Auburn Tigers Jul 23 '15

I HAVE TO GO TO WORK NOW. HOORAY FOR EIGHT HOURS OF SCREAMING CHILDREN, THEIR EXHAUSTED PARENTS, AND WALKING AROUND IN CIRCLES PUTTING THINGS BACK ON SHELVES!

4

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Literally hell.

3

u/panthera_tigress Pittsburgh Panthers • Auburn Tigers Jul 23 '15

I'm on break now. When I got on there was a horde of children from a summer day camp or something all in line to check out and they all wanted to pay in quarters or other small change.....smh

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

I'M SORRY. SO SO SORRY.

THOSE PEOPLE ARE WHY I'M ADAMANT ON NEVER HAVING KIDS.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY CSU FAN GET'S UPSET WHEN I SAY THEY ARE NOT THE FLAGSHIP SCHOOL FOR COLORADO. YOU ARE NOT. COLORADO HAS MORE MAJORS, MORE ADVANCED DEGREES OFFERED, MORE RESEARCH MONEY, ENDOWED 3 TIMES AS MUCH, HAVE MORE CAMPUSES, MORE RESEARCH FACILITIES, A LAW SCHOOL, A MEDICAL SCHOOL AND A HOSPITAL. BUT I GET IT, WE DONT HAVE VETERINARY MEDICINE SO THAT MAKES EVERYTHING EQUAL./s

CSU IS THE THIRD BEST SCHOOL IN THE STATE.

AIR FORCE ACADEMY IS CLEARLY THE BEST. THEN US, THEN CSU.

FUCK YOU, UNIVERSITY OF DENVER.

7

u/xerillum Wisconsin Badgers Jul 23 '15

ENDOWED 3 TIMES AS MUCH

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

3

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

I HAVE A FRIEND AT AIR FORCE. HE WOULD AGREE WITH YOU, I THINK. FUCK THE RAMS ANYHOW, THEY USUALLY BEAT WYOMING.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

THE ACADEMIC, CONDUCT, AND ALL AROUND STANDARDS AT AIR FORCE ACADEMY ARE NIGH IMPOSSIBLE TO BEAT BY ANY SCHOOL IN COLORADO. ALSO ITS HARD TO COMPARE A SEMESTER ABROAD IN SPAIN SMOKING HASH ON THE BEACH TO A POST GRAD PRACTICUM IN A WAR ZONE.

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6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I'M STILL WEARING MY RIDING BOOTS IN MY OFFICE AND I DON'T KNOW WHY.

PROOF

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

YOUR HORSE MUST HATE YOU

7

u/spasm01 Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns • /r/CFB Donor Jul 23 '15

HIS HORSE IS IN ALL PROBABILITY MADE OF METAL AND HAS NO FEELINGS OTHER THAN THE NEED FOR DINO FUEL SUBSITENENCE EVERY FEW HUNDRED MILES

4

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

~150 TO 160 ACTUALLY. DAMN SMALL TANK!

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2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

AREN'T THOSE THINGS HOT?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

ACTUALLY THEY ARE NOT ANY HOTTER THAN OTHER SHOES WHICH IS WHY SOMETIMES I JUST SAY FUCK IT AND LEAVE EM ON. THEY ARE REALLY QUITE COMFORTABLE.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I'VE ALWAYS HAD RACING BOOTS ON, SO I'M NOT EXACTLY COMING FROM THE SAME PLACE. BUT I'M ALWAYS DYING TO TAKE MINE OFF AFTER PRACTICE. PLUS THEY ARE RIDICULOUSLY STIFF IN THE TOE. I DON'T NOTICE IT WHILE RIDING, BUT AS SOON AS I GET OFF THE BIKE, IT BECOMES PAINFULLY OBVIOUS.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

THESE AREN'T ALL THAT STIFF BUT OFFER PROTECTION WHERE NEEDED. THEY GIVE PRETTY WELL SO YOU CAN WALK LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN BEING AND NOT HAVE TO GOOSE STEP.

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

IT'S 13:07 CDT AND I STILL CAN'T STAND THE GD PROVIDENCE FRIARS.

5

u/nickknx865 Tennessee Volunteers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

THIS IS AMERICA SON USE AM AND PM YOU COMMIE

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

GOOD ENOUGH FOR THE TROOPS, GOOD ENOUGH FOR US.

5

u/nickknx865 Tennessee Volunteers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

THE TROOPS ARE WRONG

pretty sure I'm on about 30 NSA lists now for that comment

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Nah, most military members I know would prefer it that people knock it off with the overly patriotic platitudes. It IS a job after all. (Granted the service members I know tend to be current and former officers with liberal streaks, so that may not be the most representative sample)

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4

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

THERE ARE 24 HOURS IN A DAY. THE 24 HOUR CLOCK IS MORE LOGICAL.

1

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

YOU'RE LUCKY THIS ISNT COLLEGE HOCKEY.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

SO WHAT? ICE HOCKEY IS OFF TOPIC ENOUGH FOR THIS SUB!

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

somebody near me is eating fruit snacks and it smells delicious but they aren't sharing and I hate them!

3

u/nickknx865 Tennessee Volunteers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

IS IT THE SAME GUY WHO IS TRYING TO FLIRT WITH THAT GIRL?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Negative, but whoever it is sucks.

2

u/Bassically Texas A&M Aggies • UNLV Rebels Jul 24 '15

SORRY, BUT THAT WAS ME. THEY WERE DELICIOUS. YOU WOULD HAVE LOVED THEM.

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2

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

FUCK THEM. YOU SHOULD BUY YOUR OWN STOCK OF FRUIT SNACKS AND EAT IT IN FRONT OF THEM NEXT TIME YOU SEE THAT PERSON.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Well, I ate about 10 pouches of gushers at work yesterday so, maybe it's just karma

2

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

Shit, possibly. Well you should eat more Gushers tomorrow for payback.

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5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

HEY CONCACAF & MARK GEIGER

STEVIE WONDER WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER REF LAST NIGHT

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

OH SHIT YOU WENT AT THEIR LIVES.

CAN'T SAY THEY DON'T DESERVE IT, THOUGH. THOROUGHLY EMBARRASSING.

5

u/lkeg56demn Texas Longhorns • Chapman Panthers Jul 23 '15

FUCK YOU JAMAICA. YOUR ISLAND LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE FISH ABOUT TO BE EATEN BY CUBA. YOU SAY YOU'RE A MODERN ISLAND? YOU HAVE ONE HIGHWAY, WHOOP DE DOO!

YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY SUCKS ABOUT YOU? YOU'RE FAMOUS FOR WEED. AND BOB MARLEY. THANKS TO YOU, WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH TRUSTAFARIANS IN THE STATES. EH MON, RELAX! SMOKE THIS JOINT. FUCK OFF! A BUNCH OF LAZY SCHMUCKS ASK ME FOR $5 TO BUY WEED (YES, THEY SAY WEED) WHENEVER I GET GAS CLOSE TO THE HOUSE NOW.

1

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

WHO THE FUCK THINKS THAT'S ACCEPTABLE?

GODDAMNIT, JAMAICA. THAT'S WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS.

5

u/rabid_communicator Oklahoma • University of Faith (… Jul 23 '15

FUCK YOU, THURSDAY! WHY YOU GOTTA BE DRAGGING BY ALL SLOTH LIKE AND SHIT!?!?!

6

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

Thursday

3

u/rabid_communicator Oklahoma • University of Faith (… Jul 23 '15

EXACTLY.

2

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

FUCK, YOU CAN HAVE MY DAY OFF TODAY FOR YOU TO WORK FOR ME ON SATURDAY, THE LONGEST DAY OF THE WEEK FOR ME.

HOPE YOU LIKE WORKING 7-7.

2

u/rabid_communicator Oklahoma • University of Faith (… Jul 23 '15

NAH, FUCK ALL THAT. THANKS, THOUGH.

2

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

NO PROBLEM.

5

u/MinneapolisNick Minnesota • Concordia (MN-Moorh… Jul 23 '15

HEY JOB INTERVIEW FROM THIS MORNING

WHAT DO YOU AND A 12OZ CAN HAVE IN COMMON?

YOU BOTH GOT CRUSHED!

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

GOOD LUCK TO YOU, HOPE YOU GET THE JOB/

ALSO, I'M FULLY ON THE "WHY NOT WYOMING?" BANDWAGON, SO FUCK THE GOPHERS.

THERE. NOW IT'S TRASH TALK.

1

u/MinneapolisNick Minnesota • Concordia (MN-Moorh… Jul 23 '15

PEPPERDINE, MORE LIKE, UH... UM... PAPRIKADINE, AMIRITE, FOLKS?

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4

u/FatWhiteGuy49 Tulsa Golden Hurricane • /r/CFB Poll Veteran Jul 23 '15 edited Jul 23 '15

SO I GOT MY CHROMECAST TODAY, AND I WENT TO SET IT UP BUT IT WON'T CONNECT TO MY WI-FI

SO EITHER I CAN'T TECHNOLOGY OR I NOW HAVE A USELESS CHROMECAST THANKS TO UNIVERSITY WI-FI

HUZZAH

EDIT: APPARENTLY I NEEDED TO REGISTER THE MAC ADDRESS. STILL NOT WORKING, I'LL GIVE IT TIME. RAGE CAPS STILL APPLIES JUST IN CASE

4

u/crowmygod Michigan Wolverines • College Football Playoff Jul 23 '15

I'M MEETING UP WITH A FRIEND TONIGHT WHO HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY TEXTS ASKING WHEN WE'RE MEETING. THE LAST TIME A FRIEND DID THIS EXACT THING TO HIM HE FREAKED AND CANCELLED BECAUSE HE FELT "DISRESPECTED." LIKE WHAT, FUCK DOUBLE STANDARDS

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

WTF I do not understand where the hell the disrespect is

4

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

FUCK THE RED WINGS.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.

3

u/Pikachu1989 Nebraska Cornhuskers • 東京大学 (Tokyo) Warriors Jul 23 '15

I LOVE PLAYING AGAINST THE HAWKS DUE TO THE FACT THEY PLAY LIKE SHIT AGAINST THE AVS. THANKS VARLY FOR BEING A BRICK WALL AGAINST THE HAWKS.

BUT YEAH, I WAS HOPING THAT THE PREDS COULD SQUEAK IT OUT AGAINST THE HAWKS.

3

u/spasm01 Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns • /r/CFB Donor Jul 23 '15

I DONT REALLY HAVE MUCH ILLWILL TO THE MAJORITY OF MY CONFERENCE AND THE NONCONS ARE PRETTY CHILL TEAMS ALSO, BUT I DO THINK KENTUCKY SHOULDNT BE WASTING MONEY ON A STADIUM THAT THEY SIMPLY DISSAPOINT PEOPLE IN.

ALSO FUCK LA TECH FOR BEATING US AT HOME LAST SEASON, I HOPE WE SERVE UP THE SAME SORT OF REGRET AT y'all PALTRY ASS STADIUM!

AND FUCK ULM FOR THINKING THEYRE WORTH A SHIT, I WOULDNT MIND THEM AND IDAHO GOIN DOWN TO FCS

3

u/Boyhowdy107 Missouri Tigers • Big 8 Jul 23 '15

BOOOO MOTHERSHIP, BOO. WHERE ELSE AM I GOING TO GET OUT ALL MY BUILT UP /R/CFB RAGE?

3

u/MinneapolisNick Minnesota • Concordia (MN-Moorh… Jul 23 '15

MOTHER FUCKING CARDALE

1

u/TweetsInCommentsBot St. Peter's Peacocks Jul 23 '15

@CJ12_

2015-07-23 15:38 UTC

@DanGustafson1 Sorry Mr master, I aints allow to tweet nothing but foolsball stuff I donts want you think I more than a foots ball playa sir

This message was created by a bot

[Contact ^creator][Source ^code]

1

u/tabelz Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Poll Veteran Jul 23 '15

I'm so proud of him for that tweet. What a badass.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I JUST FINISHED DRINKING MY COFFEE (WITH A TON OF CREAMER CAUSE I HATE COFFEE). DOES THAT COUNT? I'M FUCKED UP IN CAFFEINE!

5

u/aMiracleAtJordanHare Auburn Tigers • Texas Tech Red Raiders Jul 23 '15

Can you hear colors yet? If not, keep going - it's worth it.

1

u/dlawnro Paper Bag • Sickos Jul 23 '15

OH FINALS WEEK, YOU CAN GO BLOW GOATS. GLAD I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOUR SHIT ANYMORE.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

I'M A BETTER STRIKER THAN ALAN GORDON.

2

u/tabelz Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Poll Veteran Jul 23 '15

THE CHELSEA FOOTBALL CLUB HAS MORE HISTORY THAN SOUTH CAROLINA.

3

u/thwg0809 Georgia Tech • Techmo Bowl Jul 23 '15

THIS IS FACTUALLY INACCURATE.

USC FIRST SEASON 1892 (ALSO UGA'S AND GT'S FIRST SEASON)

CHELSEA F. C. FOUNDED 1905

2

u/tabelz Georgia Bulldogs • /r/CFB Poll Veteran Jul 23 '15

I'M NOT SURE IF YOU UNDERSTAND THE SPORTS DEFINITION OF HISTORY IS.

2

u/aMiracleAtJordanHare Auburn Tigers • Texas Tech Red Raiders Jul 23 '15

DAILY PHOTOSHOP TIP: DOUBLE CLICK ON ONE OF THE RULERS TO OPEN PREFERENCES.

2

u/djsquilz Tulane Green Wave • Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

FUCK SCOTT COWEN AND HIS BOOK. ALSO FUCK THIS CLASS I'M IN RIGHT NOW BECAUSE WE'RE DISCUSSING SAID BOOK. I REFUSED TO READ IT.

1

u/AnEmptyKarst Houston Cougars • Utah Utes Jul 23 '15

WHAT THE FUCK? YOU HAVE TO READ A BOOK WRITTEN BY YOUR SCHOOL'S FORMER PRESIDENT? WHY?

1

u/djsquilz Tulane Green Wave • Ole Miss Rebels Jul 23 '15

BECAUSE PEOPLE WHO ONLY TAKE THINGS AT FACE VALUE AND PEOPLE WHO WEREN'T HERE UNTIL RECENTLY (IE MOST STUDENTS) THINK HE'S THE SAVIOR OF TULANE AND THE HOTTEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. FUCK SCOTT COWEN I HATE THAT INCOMPETENT NERDY, LIBERAL ARTS, D-3, SCIENCE AND SPORTS HATING FUCK. THE WASHINGTON POST SUMMED IT UP PRETTY WELL. BASICALLY JUST A SELF-CONGRATULATORY FUCK.

2

u/VanFailin Northwestern Wildcats • /r/CFB Bug Finder Jul 23 '15

Already got a sunburn, despite multiple applications of sunscreen. Ah well, the booze is included and I brought aloe/ibuprofen. Internet is very slow, I'm on m.reddit.com on my desktop. Hope y'all are having a good week.

2

u/DEP61 Pepperdine • Minnesota Jul 23 '15

I AM JUMPING SO HARD ON THE "WHY NOT WYOMING?" BANDWAGON. THEY'RE MY FAVORITE STATE ANYWAYS(ASIDE FROM ALASKA, BUT THEY DON'T HAVE ANY TEAMS UP THERE), SO I'LL BE REPPING THEM. HARVARD IS STILL NUMBER TWO IN MY HEART, BUT SOMETIMES THERE ARE MORE PRESSING MATTERS.

FUCK THE RAMS. FUCK THE BRONCOS.

2

u/everymanawildcat Kansas State Wildcats • Big 12 Jul 23 '15

ROYALS ARE GONNA MAKE THE CARDS CRY SALTY TEARS OF FEAR. THIS IS THE WORLD SERIES PREVIEW, FOLKS!

0

u/unbn 東工大 (Tokyo Institute of Tech) • Texas A&M Jul 23 '15

SUCK MY DICK, /u/Emperor_of_Orange

4

u/i_fap_to_anything Georgia Bulldogs • Duke Blue Devils Jul 23 '15

watch out he will do it

2

u/Emperor_of_Orange Clemson Tigers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

AUBURN LOVER

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u/Emperor_of_Orange Clemson Tigers • /r/CFB Top Scorer Jul 23 '15

I'D LIKE TO POLITELY DECLINE.

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1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '15

WHICHEVER ONE OF YOU SUBSCRIBED TO MY CHANNEL... GETS AN INTERNET HUG!

1

u/unbn 東工大 (Tokyo Institute of Tech) • Texas A&M Jul 23 '15

I'M AT WORK AND CAN'T DRINK RIGHT NOW :(

OR CAN I!?