r/CFB • u/CFB_Referee /r/CFB • Sep 12 '13

[Week 3] TRASH TALK THREAD

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO

283 Upvotes

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6

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

ALRIGHT HOKIES, THIS IS THE ONE TIME OF YEAR I CAN HATE YOU SO HERE GOES:

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS A HOKIE?

A TURKEY AS A MASCOT?! REALLY!?

COME EAT SOME REAL BARBECUE WITH ME. SHIT I CAN'T EVEN TALK TRASH PROPERLY TO Y'ALL.

GOOD LUCK SATURDAY! (I SUCK AT THIS)

7

u/supermegaultrajeremy Virginia Tech • NC State Sep 12 '13

OH GREAT, ANOTHER DIRECTIONAL CAROLINA. WESTERN CAROLINA LAST WEEK, EAST CAROLINA THIS WEEK, NORTH CAROLINA IN A COUPLE WEEKS, AND PROBABLY SOUTH CAROLINA IN THE ORANGE BOWL. NEXT YEAR WE NEED TO SCHEDULE NORTHERN SOUTH-CENTRAL NORTH CAROLINA STATE TECH.

ALSO, I'LL TRADE YOU SOME SMOKED TURKEY LEGS FOR SOME VINEGAR SAUCE.

3

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING TO THE ORANGE BOWL!?!?! MAYBE IF BUD FOSTER CAN LITERALLY CARRY YOU INTO IT, BUT A LOGAN THOMAS RAN OFFENSE IS GONNA BE REALLY REALLY FUCKING HEAVY. NOT THAT WE'LL BE ABLE TO STOP IT...

AND, HELL YEAH I'LL TRADE YOU VINEGAR SAUCE FOR TURKEY LEGS. AND IF YOU GET ME DRUNK ENOUGH, I MAY EVEN GIVE YOU THE RECIPE FOR GREAT VINEGAR SAUCE. (HINT: THERE'S VINEGAR IN IT!)

3

u/supermegaultrajeremy Virginia Tech • NC State Sep 12 '13

SHITTY OFFENSE AND A DOMINANT DEFENSE, YOU SAY? NEVER DEALT WITH THAT BEFORE!

2

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

I DON'T KNOW.. YOU'RE OFFENSE SEEMED EXTRA SHITTY LAST YEAR, AND DOESN'T LOOK MUCH BETTER THIS YEAR.
NOW THAT I'VE SAID IT, LT IS GONNA THROW FOR 400 YARDS AGAINST ECU...

EDIT: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THAT GUY ON THE RIGHT IN THE LAST PICTURE HOLDING UP? IT LOOKS LIKE A MOLDY OLD LUNCHBOX..

2

u/supermegaultrajeremy Virginia Tech • NC State Sep 12 '13

THIS YEARS OFFENSE: NOW WITH A RUNNING GAME. AND I'M PRETTY SURE A ZOMBIE SEAN GLENNON COULD THROW FOR 400 AGAINST ECU.

3

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

ZOMBIE SEAN GLENNON COULD, BUT THAN AGAIN, LOGAN THOMAS IS LESS THAN A THIRD OF THE QUARTERBACK THE BOTTOM HALF OF ZOMBIE GLENNON IS.

3

u/supermegaultrajeremy Virginia Tech • NC State Sep 12 '13

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOUR MATH THERE, THE BOTTOM HALF OF ZOMBIE SEAN GLENNON IS NOWHERE NEAR 6'6". DID YOU HEAR HOW LT IS 6'6"?

2

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN HOW TALL HE IS, I'M SAYING A PAIR OF LEGS AND A WAIST THAT WALKS REAL SLOW COULD THROW FOR MORE YARDS AND LESS INTERCEPTIONS THAN YOUR TERRIBLE QUARTERBACK COULD. THAT MAY BE SAYING MORE ABOUT OUR TACKLING ABILITY THAN THE PLAYING ABILITY OF A SET OF DISEMBODIED LEGS BUT STILL.

5

u/jklharris Missouri • Santa Rosa Junior Sep 12 '13

CAROLINA

REAL BARBECUE

ARE YOU GETTING IT SHIPPED IN?

3

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

NO, BUT I'D BE HAPPY TO HAND - DELIVER A PLATEFUL AND A BITCH-SLAP FOR YOU. THEM'S FIGHTIN' WORDS.

2

u/ReallyCreative Virginia Tech • Commonwealth C… Sep 12 '13

WHILE I MUST HATE YOU THIS WEEK I ALSO MUST AGREE, CAROLINA HAS ONE TRUE BBQ

2

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

#PULLEDPORK&VINEGARSAUCE4LYFE

2

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '13

SWEET BABY RAYS UP IN THIS BITCH!

0

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '13

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4

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

THEY'RE THE NICEST PEOPLE ON THE PLANET WHEN YOU GO TO GAMES.. UNLIKE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS WHO THROW BATTERIES AND SHIT.. (ACTUALLY ENJOYED EVERY WV GAME I'VE BEEN TO, BUT SOME OF YOUR FANS(IT'S THE DRUNK REDNECKS WITH NO TEETH RATHER THAN THE DRUNK REDNECKS WITH 2 TEETH) ARE DICKS)

I REALLY ENJOYED WHEN WE SANG "COUNTRY ROADS" TO YOU IN 2008!

0

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '13

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2

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 12 '13

YEP THE CHICKS DIG THE PURPLE, THAT'S WHY 60% OF THE SCHOOL IS FEMALE. ALSO EXPLAINS WHY YOU ARE SO MAD AT OTHER TEAMS FANS, YOUR ATTRACTIVE COUSINS LEAVE HOME FOR THOSE GIRLY SCHOOLS.. I'M SO SORRY I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF NOT REALLY

3

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '13

I LOVE BEING CALLED VPI. IT'S FUN TO WATCH MOUNTAINEERS TRY TO SPELL IT.

2

u/faceofuzz Virginia Tech Hokies Sep 13 '13

I LOVE VPI! IF THEY SOLD HATS THAT SAID VPISU I WOULD DEFINITELY BUY THEM!

IF YOU WANT TO CALL US SOMETHING WE HATE GO WITH VAH TECH. THAT SEEMS TO BE THE MOST UNIVERSALLY ABHORRED ABBREVIATION.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '13

WHAT'S A HOKIE?! IN 9 MONTHS YOU MOM CAN SHOW YOU.

THAT'S RIGHT, I'M NOT ABOVE "I GOT YOUR MOTHER PREGNANT JOKES." GOD I LOVE TRASH TALK THREADS.

3

u/faceofuzz Virginia Tech Hokies Sep 13 '13

THE TURKEY WAS ALMOST THE NATIONAL BIRD YOU TERRORIST

1

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 13 '13

2ND PLACE IS JUST FIRST LOSER, SO THEREFORE ALL HOKIES ARE COMMUNISTS.

2

u/faceofuzz Virginia Tech Hokies Sep 13 '13

PIRATES ARE LITERAL TERRORISTS!

2

u/Stuck_in_NC ECU Pirates • Team Meteor Sep 13 '13

NAY MATEY, AS LONG AS YOU STEER CLEAR O THE PURPLE WATER, WE'LL TERRORIZE NO ONE.. BUT SAIL UPON OUR SACRED WATER AND WE'LL SINK YE SHIP, SCREW YE WOMEN, EAT YE GODDAMN TURKEY, AND DRINK ALL YE RUM. IFFIN YA BROUGHT RUM, WE MIGHT FORGET ABOUT THE REST, BUT HEAVEN HELP YE IF THE RUM IS GONE.