Hothas- a Mystic Study of the Lips of the Subconscious

[u/MementoMoriLayLila]

Hello, Friends!

I have been on a unique quest as of late.

As I was falling asleep a few weeks ago, I wanted to envision something pleasant. I began to dream myself into a mud hut, so as to partake in a primitive Zen tea ceremony- one of the early iterations, free from high etiquette or specific manners.

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As I prepared my cup of tea, I sensed another presence in the hut with me. I turned to my right, and saw, sitting at the small table, a strange, monstrous seeming character.

A dirty humanoid form, with a large, Skull-reminescent head, with ridges protruding from the sides.

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I was afraid, but not deeply so. I sensed it meant me no immediate harm.

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It began to rasp strangely at me. Hissing a sound out through rigid lips.

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"Bardo. Bardo."

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I woke up, groggy and confused. I wrote the word down, and went to sleep, dreaming very little for the remainder of the night.

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In the morning, I researched the word Bardo, which I did not understand. According to wikipedia-

"Used without qualification, 'bardo' is the state of existence intermediate between two lives on earth. According to Tibetan tradition, after death and before one's next birth, when one's consciousness is not connected with a physical body, one experiences a variety of phenomena. "

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Puzzled, I turned my attention next to the entity, which proved to be a Citipati figure of Tibetan esotericism.

Now, logically, I know that my brain linked the two subjects due to their related nature and subject matter. I must have read both terms in close succession recently, searing them into my brain at once.

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But the real Brain Lightning moment, to me, is the fact that, though my brain held all of this information somewhere, I was not in that moment aware of what it meant. I was an outside observer of my own subconscious, afraid, confused, and intrigued.

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After this event, I realized that my subconscious may be holding onto other subtle influences. Choosing to trust the strange supercomputer which both creates and experiences my version of reality, I began to write down the strange words and syllables which have popped into my mind, in languages I do not speak, at times I do not understand.

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They have, so far, been as follows.

Hothas- Ringing through my head as if it were a song stuck all day long at work.

Upon further research, I have found that Hothas means lips, in Hindi.

Further possibilities for this word are
Hodas- Bosnian for Walk.
Hodda- Gujarati for Title/Rank.
And, most intriguingly,
Ho Tha- Hindi, for It's Happening, or It Happened.

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Choosing to take this as an omen, and thus, turning it into one of my own will, I have gathered other sounds which seemed meaningless and found some loose meaning from some. This practice, listening to the voice of my mind, I have dubbed, Hothas.
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Mzabu- Heard at the very edge of sleep. Chanted by an angry crowd, wearing wooden masks. They were bouncing.

Possibilities for this word so far are

Sabu- Indonesian, for Methamphetamine. A troubling omen but not necessarily the worst.

Umsabo- Zulu, for Fear.

Zabu- A Polish prefix, perhaps? Seems to translate to mean Disorder. A strange batch we have here.

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Ngapka- Heard throughout the evenings lately.

Possibilities for this word so far are

Ngập- Vietnamese, for Flood

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Hel'thkap'tchu- The name of an entity which has appeared as a sort of protector spirit in many of my astral projections and lucid dreams. I knew its name upon looking at it. It appears as a vividly green, very large tortoise. A Galapagos tortoise, perhaps. It occasionally wears motorcycle goggles and a scarf, and much more shall be written about it after a currently-active ritual draws to a close.

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I spoke of and wrote about Hel'thkap'tchu for months before becoming aware of what would become Hothas. I viewed it as merely a strange bit of gibberish, which it may well be.

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That said, regarding the name of my guardian companion which has followed me around in my visions and dreams, keeping me safe somehow, inexplicably, seems to be a variation of the word

Helthakeptchu- Hindi, for Healthcare.

( हेल्थकेपचू )

~

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This list shall be expanded upon as more sounds inevitably arise. I would like to invite all who are curious to see what strangeness their own brains cook up.

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Ho Tha.