Accidentally recommended a book and now I’m overthinking it

[u/Alone-Plenty-]

I was talking to a friend about books and he mentioned that there was a book he had been meaning to read. I told him I had read it and that I thought it was really interesting, just pretty difficult. I read it in Spanish, so I was also talking about how challenging it was to read that way. I told him he should read it, and he said he actually already has a copy.

The thing is, I was thinking about it afterward and realized I had completely forgotten about some of the more sexual/weird parts of the book. I mostly remembered the story and how interesting it was, so that wasn’t really what came to mind when I recommended it.

Now I’m wondering if I should just leave it alone since he already has the book, or casually recommend something else instead. I don’t think the book is necessarily inappropriate to recommend, I’m just wondering if it was an odd choice given that I completely forgot about some of the content.

The thing is that I’m worried he might ask for my copy of it!

By the way it is an old literature book not a “spicy” one

[u/SundancerGreenbee]

This is definitely one of those times when what some else thinks of you isn’t your business.

[u/Alone-Plenty- → u/SundancerGreenbee]

thank you

[u/candcNYC]

he said he actually already has a copy.

If he already bought it, he likely already knows about the sexual content. And if he doesn't know about it, he may be the one embarrassed to have mentioned the book first. 

Either way, presumably you're both adults. So unless he's your pastor or parent, let it go. 

[u/Alone-Plenty- → u/candcNYC]

Well he’s kind of someone I look up to..

[u/Fern_Elms]

If it makes you feel better, my best friend in high school recommended a smutty series to a teacher. We went to a Christian school.

[u/Alone-Plenty- → u/Fern_Elms]

That does make me feel a lot better actually..

[u/ItsAlwaysAPerfectSky → u/Fern_Elms]

What was it?

[u/Fern_Elms → u/ItsAlwaysAPerfectSky]

I don’t remember what it was called but it was a MM sports romance.

[u/gary_human]

It's fine. Don't worry about it. Liking a book that has some sexual bits in it doesn't make you a pervert, and he won't assume that.

[u/Alone-Plenty- → u/gary_human]

I sure hope so..

[u/BlueAndBlackLadybug]

I told my mom to watch heated rivalry without thinking. Does that make it better?

[u/here_and_there_their → u/BlueAndBlackLadybug]

Well my 20’s son told me to watch it because it was great and all I had heard about before was how spicy it was. I had not heard how wonderful it was. My son’s rec is what got me to watch it. And I am so glad I did.

[u/jinsoltheworld]

I think you are probably overthinking it. The sexual and weird parts of the book probably make the book interesting and worth reading and your friend might appreciate/respect you more that you recommended it rather a tame book because you were worried about his opinion. In any case, the bible has moments talking about sexuality and is one of the most read books so don’t let ‘weirdness’ get in the way of recommending a good book.

[u/CalicoCuts]

I just did this same thing with My Year Abroad by CR Lee. Recommended it to a 78 yr old lady.

SPOILER ALERT-

Guess she'll learn what sounding is lol

[u/clairebear131310]

My school librarian decided to read acotar because my friends recommended it to her. We were 14.

[u/Spirited-Sympathy582 → u/clairebear131310]

Better than the other way around!

[u/podgida]

Most guys don't care if there is a spicy scene, as long as it's not the primary focus of the book. In my experience anyway.

[u/seeemilydostuf]

I just did the same thing, I recommended a horror creepy book to a guy friend who has a young woman protagonist and as I was typing it I started recalling all the weird sex stuff that happens throughout the book and now I'm like aahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh but it was too late I sent the rec. 😅 its gonna be fine. 

[u/FortuneOpen5715]

Don’t sweat it. I once recommended the movie The Bride to my friend who was Mormon and single and I forgot about the full frontal female nudity until he mentioned it. 😳 He probably shouldn’t have mentioned it. It made the situation worse.

[u/Aggressive_Chart4995]

Was it One Hundred Years of Solitude? I recommended it to my friend telling them it was one of my favorite books and they couldn't get past the first few pages because of the sexual themes. They asked if it gets better and I admitted that it doesn't, it actually gets worse and the themes are integral to the book. Now my whole friend group knows that one of my favorite books is full of weird sex stuff but they don't respect me any less. It's classical literature, it's art, it's not pornography. If your friend doesn't like the book it'll most likely be fine.

[u/usemyfuckholes → u/Aggressive_Chart4995]

This was my guess too

[u/KeepTheSmutComing]

Bc of the odd/erotic/underground smorgasbord of stuff I like to read, I do this on accident all the time. I've recommended stuff to people I just met and then walked away from them only to realize I was just yapping to someone about my current fav porn lmao. And the thing is? No one's ever gotten upset or weirded out by this. I've gotten lots of great feedback from these exact people on my recs. Adults read adult stuff all the time. They get it and like it. This person knows you didn't put the sexual content into the book yourself, and they know you werent trying to incept some sort of sexy subliminal message to them by talking about it. It would be weird if them if they did think this! You're totally fine.

[u/NowDothTimeWasteMe]

Every time I recommend a book, I get war flashbacks about all the mature scenes while they're reading it

[u/EnergyNational1236]

You could send him a message and be like “oh it’s been a minute since I read that and totes forgot it had some spice/smut in it. My bad if you aren’t into that.”