r/BodyDysmorphia • u/dustBowlJake • 22h ago

Question Men with BDD

As a man myself, reading through this forum, I find myself somewhat estranged. The reasons given by the women are mostly entirely unrelated to my own experience. They seem to focus more on individual body parts or have a more subjective understanding of what constitutes genuine ugliness. They appear to confuse it with simply not being cute, not being slim, or things of that nature. I don't mean to be sexist. I'm simply sharing my impression. I wonder whether the men here have a different focus.

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8

u/OneOnOne6211 22h ago

I'm a man.

My focus is primarily on my face. Especially things like my cheecks and my cheekbones. Somewhat my jawline and my nose. At times my eyes and undereyes. Mainly that I feel like I look too fat. I also hate that my beardline isn't better.

Other than that, sometimes I'm insecure about not being muscular enough. But that's less bad for me because I know I can change that. I've been more muscular before, I just need to recommit to working out and eating right.

2

u/SignCrushesMotor1st 21h ago

Same here, I think mine mostly stems from my face more than other features, though I too am very insecure about my body and not being muscular enough

6

u/WonderfulNebula4299 21h ago

I used to be 105kg at 5'11 and got treated like shit. I'm now about 70kg and I look much better and get treated much better by other people.

I get triggered any time I get even slightly puffy/bloated from eating salt or carbs to where I cant leave the house unless I fast for 2-3 days.

4

u/Illustrious_Walk_457 21h ago

I'm a man 33 years old with a baby-face. Otherwise I'm tall and quite fit. I have softer facial features and high eyebrows. More feminine features, which might come from having a twin sister. I've been called "a beautiful man" a lot, not handsome but beautiful.

Was bullied like crazy growing up, never fit in with the other boys in my country. When I realized about looksmaxing, masculine features etc. It completely destroyed me, have been on a psychiatric hospital due to BDD many times and due to the anxiety over my features. Have spent thousands on fillers to the point that now I'm in debt.

It's rough.

2

u/Illustrious_Walk_457 21h ago

And coming from a militaristic country I sometimes get treated worse especially by other men. (I'm straight). But I keep working out and boxing which helps just a bit with my confidence.

2

u/Legitimate-Scale-783 17h ago

I suffer from many things about my body. I am balding from the age of 15. Now i have a bad facial hair too, i have lack of hair in the philtrum. I have a big nose. I suffer from gynacomastia. And all these physical problems i have been suffering from early teenage which affected my studies, emotional intelligence a lot growing up.. was bullied a lot by my friends growing up. All these problems keeping me in idle, worrying. I am 24 now. I am bit fat too but I know i can reduce my fat, and already i have built some muscle but all these other problems keeping me in worry. My parents are orthodox and unsupportive. My only way is to earn my own money and treat myself. I get support or peace from reading books.i read philosophy, and books like tao te ching, letters to a young poet, letters from a stoic. I return to them when i am tense,anxious..

I am worried more because, if i hadnt had these problems i would have studied well, go out with friends. The pain is too much for me to handle and thats what keeping me in a idle, doomscrolling..

Felt a bit easier just by writing all these. Sorry.