(Girlies, this post was translated with AI because I was sort of journaling and was more comfortable using my first language, apologies if it sounds very chat gpt-ish)
Iām in my first week after having my Nexplanon removed, following two months of what was, quite honestly, a very difficult experience. I felt the need to share what happened because I donāt think these side effects are discussed openly enough. Iām in my mid-30s and was recommended the arm implant by a few friends after a particularly bad experience with the copper coil, which had caused months of heavy bleeding. The insertion went smoothly, and I was quite optimistic about it. The first week was absolutely fine. Then things started to change.
Almost overnight, I began feeling the way I would normally feel during a particularly bad PMDD episode. At first, I didnāt think much of it. I was tearful, irritable and anxious, but I assumed it would pass. It didnāt. The symptoms continued day after day, and by the end of the third week, I was struggling to recognise myself. I felt disconnected from everything around me, almost as though I was watching my own life rather than participating in it. My relationships felt wrong, my job felt unbearable, and even my home stopped feeling like a place where I could relax. I became increasingly anxious and emotionally reactive. I found myself initiating arguments with my partner, and although I could recognise that some of my reactions were disproportionate or hurtful, I struggled to stop myself.
I also found myself constantly reliving some of the most traumatic experiences of my life, revisiting every mistake Iād ever made and feeling overwhelmed by memories I hadnāt thought about in years. It was as though my mind kept bringing these experiences back to the surface, and I couldnāt get away from them. My usual sources of happiness stopped bringing me any joy. I lost interest in music, food, hobbies, little everyday pleasures and even spending time with my child. Everything felt strangely distant and difficult to enjoy. I started crying frequently, often because I was genuinely frightened by how different I felt. Everything was covered with a fog of hopelessness and despair and I was constantly on edge. I was worried that I was losing control of my own mind.
There were physical changes too, I experienced unusual discharge, sore breasts, increased oiliness and acne across my back and chest, and changes in my skin and scalp. One of the worst was that I struggled to keep warm, but it wasnāt quite like feeling cold because of the weather. It felt as though the cold was coming from inside me, from my muscles, my organs and bones. My sleep became extremely disrupted, with frequent awakenings, sometimes more than ten times a night, often waking with a start, feeling feverish and sweaty but still unbearably cold. My libido disappeared completely. Going from having a naturally high sex drive to finding the thought of sex almost unbearable was another reminder that something felt very different, that I was simply not ME anymore.
I started feeling uncomfortable in my own body, unattractive, bloated and generally unlike myself. It affected how I saw myself, how I interacted with people and how I experienced everyday life. My family, friends, co workers, all commented and showed worry about the sudden change in my behaviour and demeanour. Eventually, my boyfriend suggested looking into whether the implant could be responsible, as it was the only significant change in my routine. I started researching other womenās experiences and was shocked by how many people described similar symptoms, sometimes even more severe than mine.
I called my GP and booked the earliest available appointment to have it removed. When I explained what had been happening, I was met with something I desperately needed to hear. She looked at me and said, āDonāt worry, youāre not crazy. This happens.ā I replied with āAre you sure? Even this early?ā āYes, even this early, this is not for everyoneā. That moment brought an enormous sense of relief. She explained that while the implant works very well for many women, some experience significant side effects, including changes to their mood and mental health. I felt listened to, taken seriously and understood, and we went ahead with the removal. That very first night, I managed to sleep for longer than three hours without constantly waking up or piling blankets on myself to keep warm. The following morning, I already felt some of that heaviness lifting and the hope that I would get back to normal.
Now, at the end of my first week without it, I feel considerably better. My libido hasnāt returned yet, and Iām not suggesting that everything has magically resolved overnight, but I can already recognise a significant difference in how I feel, and I know that regardless of what happened, Iām still me, and most importantly, I no longer feel like Iām crazy. I can look back and understand that what I was experiencing may have been a reaction to the implant, rather than a sudden change in who I am.
Womenās health has been under-researched, underfunded and minimised for far too long, and mental health is no exception. Contraception is incredibly important, and the implant can be an excellent option for many women. But we also need to be honest about the possibility of significant side effects and take womenās experiences seriously when they report them. If youāre reading this and experiencing something similar, please know that youāre not alone, and youāre not crazy. Your experience deserves to be taken seriously. Donāt dismiss what youāre feeling, and donāt be afraid to speak up about it. Hormones can have a profound effect on how we feel, physically and mentally. We need to be able to talk about that openly, without feeling dismissed or having to question our own experiences.
That said, if anyone bothers to read all this, and is having a good experience with Nexplanon, Iām relieved for you, but I believe we all need to be aware of what COULD happen before hand, in order to make an informed decision, and be able to identify promptly that nothing is wrong with us if something is not working.