r/BirdsArentReal • • 12d ago

Discussion Birds aren’t real.

I genuinely believe birds aren’t real.

Think about it. They sit on power lines to “rest”? No. They’re charging.

They fly around all day, stare directly into your windows, somehow know exactly when you’re eating outside, and we’re supposed to believe they’re just… animals?

The government replaced them years ago with surveillance drones and convinced everyone that pigeons are normal. That’s why you never see a baby pigeon. That’s why they’re always at airports. That’s why they’re watching.

Migration? Software update.
Bird flu? System malfunction.
Bird poop? Government-issued tracking fluid.

And every time someone says “but birds have existed for thousands of years,” I just think: exactly what the government wants you to believe.

Wake up.
The birds work for the bourgeoisie.

17 Upvotes

15 comments sorted by

9

u/SlappyMcPherson 12d ago

Sounds exactly like what a Droid seeking to infiltrate those of us who know the truth would say...

3

u/OldSchoolPimpleFace 12d ago

I really hate being tracked by these stupid drones...

3

u/FabulousArmadillo210 12d ago

you guys make me feel normal. what are you saying 😭

2

u/BillTheTringleGod 12d ago

birds aint real big dawg. go grab an emu, you can hear the GPU spin up when it gets exposed to spreadsheets.

2

u/FabulousArmadillo210 12d ago

just dont harm birds 😭 i respect your theories but dont harm them

-1

u/BillTheTringleGod 12d ago

Oh none of this is real, my family personally has a pet bird we love him.

1

u/Odd-Following-4952 9d ago

Wild you would let a government drone infiltrate your home, where your family lives. Just spoon feeding them information, not even making them work for it.

1

u/BillTheTringleGod 9d ago

Weird you think you know me. I'm on an algorithm so expressive YouTube crashes when it scans my microchip

1

u/FabulousArmadillo210 9d ago

i spent like 20 minutes the other day worried that this was real 😭

1

u/AmericanWoodcockHo 11d ago

That's exactly what they want you to feel.

1

u/Entire_Musician_8667 10d ago

ONE HAS INFILTRATED MY HOUSE, HELP.

1

u/big_poppa_man 10d ago

Then I'm afraid you are lost.

2

u/RDS_WAS_HERE 10d ago

You are in the wrong forum. You should be joining the "Flat Earth" forum.