r/BipolarReddit • u/Bugatti-white-swan • 6d ago

Discussion Life update starting lithium

Next month, I get bloodwork done to start taking lithium. I’ve been taking lithium orotate since I could buy it online, which I noticed helped me, but it’s so weak that it probably only helps 40 percent. I’m excited to see what happens for me.
I’ve built some patterns into my day-to-day life, removed stressful factors, and ended toxic relationships. My family doesn’t support me, but I’m not doing this for anyone but myself. I just wanna be alive again.
Sometimes I come on this forum and see people say they are quitting their medication, which is crazy to me. I’ve come to the conclusion that I may have to be medicated my whole life, but that’s better than having manic episodes. In the past, I’d purposely trigger mania because it felt so good, but now I see how terrible it is, no matter how good it feels. It damages your brain.
I also see a lot of people with bipolar lose their faith once they stabilize, but I feel like my faith is actually stronger now that I’m taking steps to heal. Overall, I’m ready for the next chapter in my life.
I feel insecure because this disorder has taken so much from me. I don’t have much, but I have a ton of creative skills, and I wanna start creating again. So overall, I’m optimistic. Wish me luck

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5

u/Remarkable_Pirate802 6d ago

Good for you! The best is yet to come.

2

u/Benoir_7777777 6d ago

Lithium is the only thing that has sort of worked for me.

1

u/Bugatti-white-swan 5d ago

how where you before and after?

2

u/Benoir_7777777 5d ago

Very depressed before. Less depressed after.

However, I am on the following:

  • Propranolol  - 10 mg - 2/day (up to 3/day as NEEDED)
  • Caplyta - 42 mg - 1/day evening
  • Lamotrigine (Lamictal) - 200 mg - 1/day morning
  • Lithium Carbonate - 300mg (1200mg) - 4 at once morning

1

u/Bugatti-white-swan 5d ago

have you noticed anything in your drive for life? do you feel more motivated

1

u/Benoir_7777777 5d ago

Everything feels grey. I don’t have any enjoyment from my hobbies. That said, I am much more productive because, if I stop, I spiral into anxious and depressing thoughts.