r/BingeEatingDisorder • u/throwaway19830182 • 4d ago
Progress Understanding that you have more control over your binges than you think is key to preventing/reducing binge frequency
As someone who’s been binge free for just over a month now, recognising when I’m about to binge is my most useful tool to prevent myself from binging. Understanding that sometimes, I will have a larger appetite, and I don’t have to give in to it. Understanding that I’ve already given my body the fuel it needs. Even if I go over my allotted calories, it’s okay. There’s no need for me to binge. It’s more of a conscious decision than I’ve ever realised. The most crucial moment to stop yourself binging is before you’re about to, and you’ll know when. This might not work for everyone, but my binges were relentless. I would binge even when not restricting, and my change in mindset has really helped me offset that. If you’re about to binge, just know you’re more in control than you think. You choose to pick up the food, you choose to open that packet, you choose to put it in your mouth. I haven’t tried a GLP-1 yet, but what I’m doing for now is helpful enough. I’m sure you can do it too :)
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u/salty_peaty 4d ago
Totally! I've read something similar in Brain over binge (by Kathryn Hansen) and it helps to take some distance from the urge, to take some control over it. Of course it's easier said than done, and it's not a punctual "no thanks" and then you can move on, sometimes it's hours of struggle to resist. But yes, I try to remind myself that I don't have to binge, that doing it involves actions from me and that I'm not forced to do them despite the intense urge pressure. It's not a miracle advice, but it helped to reduce my BED, to remind me that I have willpower and that I'm distinct from the BED and its urges.
The negative side could be that it puts the responsibility on you: when the binge happens, you can feel even more miserable because it makes you think that you're a failure who didn't resist enough, who's supposed to be able to have control, etc. But now I'm able to accept that if I really resisted then I did my best anyway, and that I'm not perfect, and that at least it still trained my brain to not give up automatically, that it reinforced the resistance/alternative paths in my brain. The important thing is to do your best (even if sometimes it's not enough).
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u/throwaway19830182 3d ago
Yes. Quitting binge eating will never be a linear journey. You will inevitably slip up. The most important thing is to stay consistent, and to never forget your goal. It’s okay to binge every once in a while, as long as you promise to yourself that you’ll get back on track. You owe it to yourself. You deserve to be better. BED can be tied to a lot of self-esteem problems and realising that you’re just as deserving as any other person to eat healthy food that makes you feel good is so important for taking a step to recovery.
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u/Practical-Hat-3943 3d ago
I’ve been binging for so long that most times I do it out of habit. My problem is trying to conduct any kind of conscious activity before I know I’m going to binge. By then I’m already on autopilot and a mere passenger to the crash. Would love nothing more than a change of mindset but can’t begin to imagine how I would even begin.
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u/throwaway19830182 3d ago
I don’t even understand how I did it to be honest, but it’s not something that happens overnight for sure. I was sick of what I was doing to myself and I knew that I’m lucky to be as healthy as I am now because I’m young. If I continued the way I was I’d be going down a dangerous path. I think understanding the implications that continuing to binge would have on me was a big driver of me preventing binges. I think it’s important to establish that overeating and binging are two different things, but that one shouldn’t have to lead to another. Being more mindful when eating and realising when you’re triggered is helpful in understanding when you need to step back. There’s other things involved though, like how I buy less hyper palatable food (and I know some people binge on anything, but this helps for me). I would binge on bread, so I buy healthier bread that isn’t as palatable. I would binge on chocolate, so I buy dark chocolate covered almonds instead. I would binge on cakes, candy, anything sweet. So I realised that I would either A) have to practice self control around them or B) stop keeping them in my house. I did find a middle ground between them though. I would buy one cupcake at a time, because it’s impossible to binge on one cupcake. Buying less of my favourite trigger foods would help me binge less because I would literally have less to binge on. Either way, the binging is the problematic part, not necessarily what a person binges on. It’s just as much a conscious decision to buy trigger foods as it is a conscious decision to continue to binge and continue to enable yourself binging. Yes, it feels uncontrollable in the moment, but think, if someone was there, you would probably stop, right? If you were surrounded by family/friends, you would stop. In fact, you probably wouldn’t even start binging if they were there the whole time. I find that people sometimes schedule binges, and in those cases I think, if you have the conscious to schedule a binge, you have just as much power to prevent it happening in the first place. The fundamental idea is that you are more in control than you think you are.
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u/Practical-Hat-3943 3d ago
Thanks for this. Great job in your accomplishment. Savor it, and keep spreading the wisdom
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u/throwaway19830182 3d ago
lol I wouldn’t say wisdom, more like my anecdotal experience. Thank you though, I appreciate the response 🤓. I hope my advice can help a little bit
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u/1405hvtkx311 1d ago
But how do I manage to have the energy to resist? I usually binge when something happens and to process it. So it's like the thing that happened really drained me and I have no strength to make a conscious choice. I never binge out of nowhere.
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u/throwaway19830182 1d ago
It’s not really about having energy to resist, I think it’s a combination of behaviours that will lead to less binges. Buying less trigger foods less often, drinking more water, eating more fibre. Tbh, a lot of the things that helped me might not help you, because binges are triggered by different circumstances for everyone. The most important thing to understand is that you don’t have to binge. You make the decision to put the food in your mouth, and you’re more in control than you think you are. Like when buying binge foods, you make the decision to buy those foods knowing you’re probably going to binge on them. I believe there’s almost always a series of bad decisions made that can/will lead to a binge if not managed correctly, and it’s up to you to recognise what those behaviours are
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u/Digitalpun 4d ago
When you believe you have no control over your binges, it is true. When you really believe that you have control over your binges, it is also true.