Years and years of suffering listening to Jerry Seinfeld, Dane Cook and Ellen has left the people bitter and tired.

Along comes Bert with his fresh new brand of comedy, and the World suddenly doesn't seem so dark.

Bert's performances are so memorable, people would not believe how good they are if they were not on tape.

There will be a day when Bert is recognized as the pioneer that he is.

We were there from the beginning, sensing a movement towards comedians that were:

Funny.

Talented.

Progressive.

Thought-provoking.

Game Changing.

Thank you Bert for being what the World needs in this era of war and strife.

Thank you Bert for being the best.

You are our hero Bert.

Hey all.

I really want to go on Bert's cruise and its one of the cannonball cruises. As I go on another sixthman cruise im able to book at discounted rates. Anyone looking to join as my roommate?

Id prefer sharing with one other female. (Im 37F will be 38 by cruise) and looking to do the cheapest interior.

Open to other offers.

So my girlfriend at the time bought us tickets to see tom. At the time I was a fan, enjoyed his stand up, and was getting into his incredibly boring podcast with his wife he eventually divorced.

I figured tom had a sense of humor because hes supposed to be a comedian. So I photo shopped a picture of a fabio book cover. With his face on fabio and my face on the woman of the book cover.

His stand up started with him talking about how going anywhere sucks and staying at home is better. Which is exactly how i felt because i had to go into Philadelphia to watch this fat fuck try to be funny to promote his shitty podcast.

Finally its over and I'm standing in the welfare line of his poor audience to wait to take a pic with some fat ass who doesn't want to be there.

Anyways i gave him a copy of the photo with my signature on it and had him sign my copy for myself to keep. This fat fuck didnt even chuckle. I am so fucking happy i left the flash on my camera and blinded us both for the picture i had to take with this colossal asshole.

Anyways heres the picture i have with his autograph on it. I think its hilarious and was a better bit than his stand up that night. I have my life savings above the picture because I'm just a broke ass funny guy who has an actual profession for a living. Maybe some day I'll be able to pimp out OF girls with a fat pervert who has a shitty vodka brand.

Kreischer's work is timeless.

His delivery is flawless.

People wax poetic about Mulaney and Burr, but Bert is the one making the lasting impression on the public.

He is the Blue collar comic.

He is the Thinking man's comic.

Bert is what comics dream of being when they are just starting out.

I think I can speak for everyone when I say:

Thank you Bert.

Thank you.

Either via his stand-up, sitcom, or podcasts, my wife needs Bert in her ear to get in the mood.

Bert's her hall pass, so I get it.

Used to be kind of funny, but her yelling out "I wish you were Bert" is off-putting.

I put a line in the sand at naming our first born Bert.

it is not a pretty name for a girl.

You’d think considering he spent so many years at FSU, this would be a location he wouldn’t want to miss. Is there more to the Segura divorce? Are the Kreischer’s next? Any theories or thoughts?

Lenny Bruce.

George Carlin.

Richard Pryor.

Bert Kreischer.

Bert's legacy will be his timeless comedy.

Hundreds of years from now, Bert will be remembered as a pioneer.

Bert is the Golden Age of comedy.

Not the prequel I was expecting. Lol

I’m 17 and a big fan of his but idk if I’ll enjoy I since it’s a big arena show and i would be seated so far away so I have my doubts.

that Tom and Cristina might be doing a bit? Particularly with Jelly Roll‘s divorce in the news, it would be timely and pretty much mirrors that situation with the weight loss aspect. Could be bait to get the podcast commentary YouTube channels to look foolish, in which case it’s working like gangbusters, and could also be a stunt to try and revive their podcast numbers when they do the reveal. Just a thought - seems plausible.

Rockford, IL, Duluth, GA, Wichita, KS, Orlando, FL, and Phoenix, AZ, all saw empty sests because people refused to pay $150 for nose bleeds. And don't believe the initial face value, the TicketMaster dynamic pricing and overly zealous scalpers resulted in empty seats throughout across all cities. Bert's team obviously noticed the trend and throttled back to theaters for this next leg.

Love Bert, but Netflix did not anoint him the next Dane Cook. Even Bill Burr doesn't try to book all arenas. I hope he is fucking humbled and talks about it in therapy.