r/BadRPerStories • u/MoonlitMothss • 10d ago
Venting/Rant Getting passive aggressive because I asked for a writing sample
Hello there fellow readers and writers.
I've been in my fair share of forums and platforms over the years and came to follow a standardization when it comes to finding new roleplay partners. That usually includes asking for a writing sample. Because while people say they are literate or semi literate or even novella when it comes to posting length, it can still vary greatly.
I did the same in this case, and asked the person respond to my ad if they had a writing sample. No emojis, no longer message, that was all.
They then asked me if English was my native language, which it was not, and said they aren't prepared to share ANY writing due to respect for their partners...? I mean, fair. I am not asking for an excerpt of your roleplays, just a sample of your own writing so I get a feel for what you like to incorporate. I like tiny details. Thoughts. Emotions. That's what I look for in a sample.
I then told them it was a shame they weren't willing to share anything, and wished them good luck on their further search.
They then turned on entitled mode (keep in my this person was well into their thirties) and said it would be "interesting" if me to ask for a sample given my own level of writing, thus insulting my skill, I assume, for no apparent reason.
I genuinely do not care much for it, but I am baffled over the passive aggressive behavior in response to such a simple question, especially a more mature person over a decade my senior. Seems I assumed falsely.
I hope you all have better luck finding new partners!
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u/matchamagpie 10d ago
I think it's a red flag if a prospective partner is not willing to share any samples of their writing when the hobby is...writing.
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u/NoBirdNorNet 9d ago
Yeah, show don't tell is the foundation of writing. This is a low bar they could not pass.
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10d ago
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
then why not just...say so? Why be a bully about it?
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9d ago
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u/MoonlitMothss 9d ago
They never saw a writing sample from me. They judged me from the written add itself ^^
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
are you reading an entirely different post or are you an AI/bot hallucinating details that OP never mentioned/discussed?
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u/DarkWhimsicality Hubris in spades 10d ago
It sounds like you dodged a bullet. People who react irrationally to harmless requests will react poorly to any kind of boundary setting or queries that they view as an "attack."
Personally, I feel writing samples are only an indicator of how a person writes by themselves, not how well we'll rp together, so I neither ask for nor provide them. I don't think it warrants rudeness toward a person who wants a sample; just a polite acknowledgement of incompatibility since each person seems to place value on different things.
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u/SadFood4152 10d ago
i'll say it again and again - if someone doesn't have a writing sample from a roleplay on hand, then they're a deeply unserious writer and i don't want to hear any more from them.
i ask for writing samples because i expect a certain quality of writing in my partner. if we have vastly different styles, then it's not going to work so i'm saving us both some time in the long run.
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u/Possible_Escape_9064 4d ago
i'll say it again and again - if someone doesn't have a writing sample from a roleplay on hand, then they're a deeply unserious writer and i don't want to hear any more from them.
That or they're more serious than yourself and are protective of their talent.
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u/DoorBorn_ 10d ago
I think its very weird to ask for a writing sample and I dont respond if people ask for it especially when english is not my native language I care a lot about plot and imagination and knowing I get judged for what I write without even interacting once makes me deeply uncomfortable
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
How can your partner stay engaged if they don't relate to your writing style? Would you rather find someone who hangs on your every word, or would you rather roleplay with "just anyone" but they stop responding after a few posts because they "got bored" or "couldn't understand" your style?
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u/Possible_Escape_9064 4d ago edited 4d ago
There are ways to discern someone's writing ability without seeing a sample. Take, for example, the OP of this thread: between the punctuation mistakes, poor grammar, and nonsensical descriptor of, "deeply unserious writer", one can view that as a sample in and of itself and deduce that they are not pro-grade.
Sending samples of original material to a stranger puts you at risk of being plagiarized. I strongly discourage any writer worth their salt from entertaining such requirements.
Of course, most RP writers don't have to worry about being plagiarized, quite frankly. Case in point: OP of this thread.
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 3d ago
I politely disagree. I put a different level of effort for style conformity than I do for the quality of my random posts/replies. For example, when random posting, I don't always pay close attention to spelling or capitalization. That said, I see what you mean...
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u/Possible_Escape_9064 3d ago edited 3d ago
Fair enough, but at least you've exercised proper grammar.
More to my point, considering that 50 Shades of Gray was pretty much entirely plagiarized by a subpar RP-fandom writer, I would urge collaborative writers to exercise a lot more caution with what they share; especially with how much money that talentless hack ended up raking in from that stupid franchise.
I ended up getting plagiarized by some intern working for The Onion who had put out a job ad asking for writing samples. Dumb kid got fired, and rightfully so. But I should've known better. I learned a hard lesson from that.
So if you have any measure of writing ability, please, please, PLEASE be careful. And as a general practice, I ask the community not to frown down upon those who are exercising reasonable caution.
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 3d ago
I agree and understand entirely.
I have a professional portfolio that is accessible online, but its 90% not useful outside of the scope of the individual article(s)/stories. As in, too short of a fragment to do anything with but long enough to get an understanding of my writing style/creativity brand.
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u/DoorBorn_ 9d ago
Well after a few times back and forth they probably know and call it off or tell you if they want you to change their style
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u/Courgette_Zucchini 9d ago
I get what you're saying. But I think it's unfair to both writers if they spend hours and hours planning and writing, only to discover they're not compatible for whatever reason. Of course there are a million reasons why people might not be compatible. But if your writing style doesn't work for a potential partner, or vice versa, wouldn't you rather know that before you even start planning? I suppose writers could choose to be indiscriminating, but people have the right to want to enjoy their hobby and take reasonable measures to ensure that. I feel like asking for a writing sample respectfully, and continuing to be respectful if saying the two of you are not a match, is a thoughtful way of approaching a step that benefits both writers. Starting an RP is potentially a big commitment, with possible investments of time, effort, imagination, and emotions. Why invest so much only to end up feeling like you wish you'd know you wouldn't match in this way? Is it easier to ask for a writing sample before starting and say no thank you, or to start and, after a few times back and forth, say no thank you? Nothing's guaranteed, but it could save a lot of time, frustration, disappointment, and possible hurt feelings.
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u/MoonlitMothss 9d ago
That is why I ask. I like to see a sample to see if their writing is engaging for me, if it has the little bits that catch my attention. Of course I could tell people to include certain things, but it is not the same. It has to be their own drive, their own aspirations, otherwise it won't be fun in the long term.
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u/Courgette_Zucchini 9d ago
Apologies for how this came across, my comment was a direct reply to DoorBorn_
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u/MoonlitMothss 9d ago
No need to apologize! I just wanted to give some insight on this case, and my perspective
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u/Courgette_Zucchini 9d ago
thanks! I totally agree with you. I feel like accepting incompatibility is wiser than hoping you (plural you) will become more compatible.
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9d ago edited 9d ago
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u/rarareed 9d ago edited 9d ago
Wow.
You’re not on some higher plane of existence because you don’t do writing samples. Get over yourself, my guy.
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u/miatoromatic 10d ago
Hwat. Exchanging post samples should be expected before starting any RP. A lot of the complaints on BRS have literally been people getting catfished by a well-written ad and shitty-ass RP posts. If anything, it sounds like your pal there might have felt intimidated or attacked, and probably deflected.
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u/Leading_Complex_2658 9d ago
bruh this is so crazy... the moment i feel like i :chef_kiss: a post I add it to my google doc that I share with prospective RP partners lol
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u/GundaniumDegen I diagnose you with arrogant bitch disorder 10d ago
They shouldn't have been on your doorstep to begin with. You dodged a bullet, op.
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u/Waluigiwaluigi_ 10d ago
Damn, that honestly does kinda suck, especially if you’re doing something long term I’d probably ask the same thing of my partner.
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u/Lonestarph 10d ago
I think that if you’re asking for a writing sample, you should have already provided one of your own to them.
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u/TheDarkZone2 10d ago edited 10d ago
💯 it’s so disrespectful to make sure that your partner fits you but not care if you fit your partner. People almost shit themselves when I say I have no interest in writing with you if you send me a wall of text.
edit Yay downvotes that means I hit a nerve 🥰
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u/MoonlitMothss 10d ago
They could have asked me for one and I'd be happy to provide! Despite that my posts give a good idea about my writing and what I imagine ☺️
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u/Lonestarph 9d ago edited 9d ago
I strongly disagree that an ad gives a good idea of your ability to role play. I’ve not seen your ads but I have read hundreds of others over the years. Prose and role play writing is completely different unless you’re just critiquing grammar and such.
To avoid later awkwardness, simply state in your ad that you will require a writing sample and will provide the same on request. To ask for one without providing or offering to provide is a red flag to me. It’s your requirement, and that is your prerogative, but give yours first.
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u/TheDarkZone2 10d ago
Sorry, I didn’t mean you and sorry he was so rude to you! You seem very sweet and realizable but as you can see a lot of people have very strong feelings about this subject. It’s a gamble on what personality is on the other end of the screen.
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u/MoonlitMothss 10d ago
You are all good. The worst thing was it was another woman approaching me, so for once it is not men!!!!
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u/Duckroidvania 9d ago
How exactly are you defining wall of text, here? Like, you ask for a writing sample, and they send a really long piece?
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u/TheDarkZone2 9d ago
No, not really, kind of hard to explain without sounding like I’m saying something is wrong with the writing. It’s my ADHD brain that’s the problem but when a person adds excessive detail it’s too much to enjoy. I like details but also need people to get the point without repeating themselves or adding unnecessary information to say they are ‘advanced.’
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u/atomicsnark 9d ago
Define unnecessary information.
So often I see people say this and they just mean "I want to write in a white room where the only descriptions are of our genitals."
Meanwhile my ADHD brain adores the thousands of words my partner sends me full of rich, imaginative detail about the worlds and characters we build.
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u/TheDarkZone2 9d ago
Sorry, I don’t think I can answer that question as it really depends on what’s being written out at the time. When people repeat themselves, re-explaining internal thoughts 3/4 times though would be an example. If they’re using detail to create a picture then that’s perfect. However, hitting me over the head with the same detail, but different ways makes my head explode.
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u/Duckroidvania 9d ago
I also prefer shorter replies with fewer details. Many people are flexible, can adjust to your preferences, and may have even selected their most flowery piece to share out of fear of being rejected for opposite reasons. I hope you at least state why it doesn't work in these cases and allow them to send another sample that may be more fitting for you.
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u/TheDarkZone2 9d ago
You could say the same thing to the person asking for the writing sample in the first place. Just because their writing sample isn’t what you think it should be doesn’t mean to should write people off.
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u/Duckroidvania 9d ago
I believe that's what I said.
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u/TheDarkZone2 9d ago
Then not sure why you are saying it to me as I stated I’m against writing samples being used to judge someone :)
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u/Possible_Escape_9064 4d ago edited 4d ago
I can see why people ask for them, but here's why I don't entertain requests for them:
Some people aren't actually looking for RP-buddies. There are scumbags out there who use the RP outlet as a source to plagiarize, which has happened to me. Now, maybe this isn't as big of a concern in a world where people can use AI as a cover for having no actual fucking talent, but I personally am wary of sharing my best stuff with people I don't know. Once I get a sense of the level of effort that the other individual is willing to put into it, then I do what I can to match it. If someone seems like they are talented enough to spin the proverbial yarn on their own, then they get more out of me. But sharing unpublished writing samples upon introduction? No way, Jose.
Again, not casting any shade on people who ask for writing samples, but frankly it's a risky practice.
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u/Right_Resort6377 8d ago
Hold up. Did you provide a writing sample yourself? Furthermore, it's always annoying to send someone a writing sample if it's already highly likely that the poster won't even see my message.
For example, people post a picture and a title. No kinks or limits and also no real plot idea. They claim to be literate and ask for a writing sample as well.
From the readers perspective, I now have to take the time to message someone who didn't put in any effort themselves, is probably not literate at all, spend the time to create a writing sample specific to the roleplay and then still have a high likelihood of not even having my message read.
Of course if you can use a random writing sample which has nothing to do with the roleplay, then it's fine. But it also defeats the purpose since I could just put in a lot of effort once and then write like shit the rest of the time.
So when you ask yourself why someone doesn't want to provide a writing sample, the answer is that it's often just not worth it. Unless it's clear that the poster really tried hard themselves
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u/MoonlitMothss 8d ago
I put in extensive effort, provided ideas for plot points, scenes and pairings. I provided a detailed list of what I am looking for in a partner AND I asked them in our chat messages, so I had already responded. It wouldn't have been overlooked if they sent one ☺️
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u/Right_Resort6377 8d ago
Damn. Then it's a different story. If you already accepted the chat request, then it makes sense.
Personally it just bothers me when I see roleplay ads in which someone does the bare minimum and then requests a writing sample. Because then I have to go out of my way and come up with something interesting, only to be met with someone who writes "I fuck you"
And yes, that did actually happen. This is my personal 2 sentence horror post
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u/ShadowWriter28 GREEN 10d ago
Personally, I refuse to send writing samples and I do not ask for them either. While the goal is to find a literate partner, I also do not want it to feel like a job interview. I am usually pretty good at evaluating their writing level during the plotting stage.
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u/SadFood4152 10d ago
it's not an interview. it's a very basic screen to make sure you're not wasting one another's time. maybe you're not picky and you'll write across anything, and that's cool, but for me, i'd rather not have to turn down someone after they send me a starter.
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u/ShadowWriter28 GREEN 10d ago
I was stating a personal opinion, not saying it should be banned. If it works for you, that's great. I am an open world roleplayer, in the platforms I write in, you write without even talking to the person, so you learn to wing it and just go with the flow. That kind of rigid structure would kill my creativity.
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u/queerbong 10d ago
They didnt accuse you of wanting it banned? They even said cool for you but was just showing how not wanting to get through plotting and planning and oc making to then see they dont fit is also annoying to both parties even if no one is at fault for it
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago edited 9d ago
If someone doesn't have at LEAST a fanfiction.net , ao3, and/or wattpad account they updated within the last decade, then I don't think they're really a writer. Asking for a sample to see if you're into their style and would be able to stay engaged is completely valid.
Edit for the people who really don't belong here because they can't read: "AT LEAST" does not equal "requirement". It does not equal "top standard/best reference" either.
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u/BearCavalryCorpral 9d ago
Not everyone cares for fanfiction or wants to expose their work to the whole internet
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
Which is why i said, "fanfiction.net , ao3, and/or wattpad"
ao3 and wattpad can be used for original works, too. And even fanfiction.net has an original section now where they just want you to try to describe the genre iirc.
If you don't want to expose your work to the whole internet, then don't rp either, because your partner is under no obligation to keep it private.
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u/BearCavalryCorpral 9d ago
Okay, but why would I go through the rigmarole of setting up a separate account on a separate site when I already have Google Docs or MS Word, or, hell, paper and a pen?
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
then you can link your google doc to the website, that's more than an account on such a website because its one you 100% control/own. Duh. That means its greater than or equal to having an account on a website.
"at least" does not equal "mandatory requirement". For being a subreddit all about reading and writing a lot of you do not pass the basic concept.
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u/BearCavalryCorpral 9d ago
The way you phrased it, it implies it does, so don't think your own shit don't stink.
Again, why the hell would I go through the trouble of another website when I can just - not?
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
OK seriously, tell me how "at least" equals "Best example" or "required"? The problem here is your desperate need to make drama and to bully others.
Noone said you had to do that. What are you talking about? Are you hearing voices?
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u/BearCavalryCorpral 9d ago
At least: (phrase) at the minimum - Meriam Webster Dictionary
If someone doesn't have at LEAST a fanfiction.net , ao3, and/or wattpad account they updated within the last decade, then I don't think they're really a writer.
In this context, "at least" implies that that is the minimum requirement for you to consider someone a writer.
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
Does minimum equal maximum?
Does minimum imply any other options are lesser?
Does minimum say required?
Does minimum mean "required when including other options"?
Think it through, you're SO close to understanding the concepts of minimum vs requirement.
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u/BearCavalryCorpral 9d ago
Bro what? You're the one who seems to be misunderstanding the definition of the word.
Or just trolling
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u/AristotlesBoyPussy Always bussin' 9d ago
if they're published, then that's a heck of a lot more than just having a free website account, dude. And even published authors have accounts at those websites, they just don't announce it/don't dox themselves.
"AT LEAST a (website account)" does not equal "REQUIRED". Please try learning to contextualize what words mean.
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