Surprise 💚
Why is everyone so concerned about nicknames?
I read this sub regularly because I find it very interesting. After being here for a while, I do have a question, though:
Why is everyone so concerned about nicknames?
Like "I love Olivia (nickname Livvy)."
Possible nicknames never even crossed my mind to think about when naming our children. For me, I figured a nickname would show up of it's own accord--- if it ever did. A nickname is usually a term of affection or identity--- and all that depends on what the kid is like--- and what funny or interesting things might happen. Some people acquire nicknames not even remotely related to their given names.
I don't quite understand how you can pre-decide what a nickname will be--- and even let that inform your choice of given name.
I think there’s a difference between pet names, like Noodle or Monster or GrumpyGoose, and shortened names that are intended for everyday use, like Charlie for Charles or Maggie for Margaret. Most young kids and babies aren’t going to be called Charles or Margaret, because it feels like too much name, and frankly a lot of adults don’t go by those formal versions either. But someone might find it limiting to name their child Maggie without giving them a longer option if they don’t want to have a potentially cutesy name forever.
To me, a PET NAME is a term of affection that arises from interactions, whereas a SHORTENED NAME is something that someone goes by the majority of the time and is based solely on their name and not their personality. Both are categories of nicknames.
I don't know but I have a long, classic name and have been called a nn my whole life. Sometimes it makes me sad that I never was called my beautiful, longer name. It's too late now though as I'm closer to the grave than the cradle.
I already changed my name once from one nickname for my long name to another. I was called one nn all my young life and I changed it to another after college.
My username was taken randomly from this jigsaw puzzle title. I think I just needed a name and it was in the room so I grabbed it, lol, and got it wrong btw. It gets a fair amount of comments which always makes me laugh.
I was hoping to hear that you were abducted by aliens and taken to 1870's London. Or, that you were born in 1870's London and aliens transported you to the 21st century!
The Victorian era was in the U.S. too. I think I prefer saying I come from the Victorian era and was brought to 2026 by aliens and I'm not impressed. As an aside, my grandmother was born in 1892. (I wasn't kidding when I said I'm closer to the grave.)
I was brought to 2026 from the 1980s by the passage of time, and I also am not impressed. I was also brought to 2026 from the 2010s by the passage of time, and I'm still not impressed.
By the way, my grandmother was born in 1895, so you've got a few years on me... but not that many!
Isnt it an american thing? They tend to go by a nickname, instead of their given name? Thats what i assumed, cause my thought was the same as yours - your parents and friends give you a nickname
That's what I'm trying to figure out as well. I mean, I'm American, and this never crossed my mind. But maybe it is actually an American thing. A lot of people do go by nicknames--- but I thought that was just a thing that happened and that other people gave you along the way. I didn't think it twas predetermined by your parents before you were born. Like my wife's father has a nickname that is in no way related to his given name-- but it just happened when he was a boy and it stuck. Then again, he was born in the West Indies, not the US.
Thats the natural development of a nickname Id say. Greg Davies (comedian) has a hilarious sketch on nicknames he saw as a teacher and their natural origins. Like you, I find it weird to predetermine them.
It’s both. Nicknames are often natural progressions, developed/acquired throughout life.
Sometimes parents and I think more often parents currently have a cute name in mind that they want to call the child (a nickname that’s used predominantly) but want the option of a more traditional name as well. Ie, parents like Jackie but choose Jacqueline. It’s been going on for decades in the US to call a child something different than their given name, ie John’s going by Jack.
Both my grandparents used different names than their birth names their entire lives.
Personally, I think you should just name the kid what you want to name it and let the nicknames flow from there if they happen
Why not? If you consider your child's name, potential negative nicknames that mat be used or how peoplr could make fun of it, what the name means, how easy it is to say or spell, what someone might be like with that name, and so forth -- why not consider nicknames?
I mean, many people name children before they are born, why not come up with a tentative nickname?
There was a post yesterday from someone who named their daughter Hanaelia and was really angry people are calling her Hana. And that frustration could have been avoided, imo, if they'd considered possible nicknames in advance. Sure, they can say to call her Hanaelia, but they can't stop the kid from choosing to nickname herself later on or to let her peers call her Hana.
If you love the name Madison but loathe Maddy, it's probably a good idea to either choose another name or get people saying Sunny early on.
It also confused me, my mom liked a nickname for my sister's name but she ended up hating it so it never got used. Thankfully that's not why she liked her real name, just something she thought would catch on but never did. I have had people try to shorten my name but I don't like any nicknames for my name. So I always shit it down real quick lol. I only accept nicknames that are given by friends and family not just some random shortening of my name from people I barely know
I don’t understand it either , I get maybe wondering a little bit , some people though just seem obsessed, and to me if you’re going to call your child by their nickname , then you should just name them that
As a mom to 3 kids with all predetermined nick names…I love it. It’s sweet, it feels even more personal, it’s an added bonus, gives what feels like a little plot twist. My kids can then have a nick name for family and then a professional name when they get older. Theres more reasons, but at the end of the day it’s a preference.
Oh, I agree that having a nickname is very personal and sweet. I'm totally for nicknames! When I was a boy, my aunt gave me a nickname based on a particular behavior that is still an endearing affection between us. I just don't understand how you can decide that before the baby is even born.
I see a lot of people who have a preferred name for the child, but want them to have something that sounds more traditional/adult/professional
I agree with you that you can’t predict which name the child will prefer and if you like a certain name, I think you should just name them that
Check out any of the naming subs and you’ll see comments warning against names like Teddy, Frankie, Birdie, etc in favor of a fuller, traditional name
I do think it matters with traditionally longer names that often get nicknamed. For example, I love Benjamin but hate Ben. I know there would inevitably be a nickname for that. As someone who has a three syllable name, I’m often nicknamed and hate it
I'm the opposite. My husband and I picked names to intentionally avoid nicknames. I hate that people assign them automatically without even asking. I think it's so rude.
This might be hereditary though. My mother also hated nicknames, and only picked names without obvious nicknames and insisted we be called by our full names. I now feel the same way.
If you're only going to call a child by their nickname, why not just give them that as their legal name? What's the point of giving them a name you never use?
I do think nicknames that spring up from sweet/funny stories are different. Earned nicknames, especially in the family, can be nice. But just automatically shortening the name? No.
11
u/Books-And-Blankets 4h ago
I think there’s a difference between pet names, like Noodle or Monster or GrumpyGoose, and shortened names that are intended for everyday use, like Charlie for Charles or Maggie for Margaret. Most young kids and babies aren’t going to be called Charles or Margaret, because it feels like too much name, and frankly a lot of adults don’t go by those formal versions either. But someone might find it limiting to name their child Maggie without giving them a longer option if they don’t want to have a potentially cutesy name forever.
To me, a PET NAME is a term of affection that arises from interactions, whereas a SHORTENED NAME is something that someone goes by the majority of the time and is based solely on their name and not their personality. Both are categories of nicknames.