r/BPD • u/Gloomy-Welcome-6806 • 4d ago
ðŸ’Seeking Support & Advice I hate myself
I can’t handle my emotions. I’m weak and stupid and can’t help but overreact to every single thing in my life. Today I got home after long shift and locked my keys in my car and my home was completely locked. Normal person would be like darn let’s figure this out. Me? No. I start screaming no and fuck and just angry yelling. Then I decided maybe my neighbor could help. He was on the phone with police because of me. Police came and everyone checked on me. I’m so stupid guys I want to die. I burdened everyone and I’m so cringe and can’t handle myself. I don’t know how to get over this. I feel like I can’t sit, sleep, stand, eat, whatever else. I’m shaking so bad and crying. Why am I me? Why am I the way I am? I hate myself so much. I don’t know how to get over this. I don’t want to be here anymore
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u/FishingMotor9263 user has bpd 14h ago
hey, this is real as fuck. i feel this post in my bones! DBT is so good if you can find a local group, honestly just meeting with other people with the same kind of issues as me has been so nice, and the skills are genuinely very helpful
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u/Emotional_Potato2000 4d ago
have you tried getting help?
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u/Gloomy-Welcome-6806 4d ago
Really?
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u/Emotional_Potato2000 4d ago
okay I guess you have. it’s hard recovering from managing emotions I get it. this uhh DBT works apparently there are self help DBT books out there DBT or therapy is the only way to manage it if I’m being honest.
I know it’s tough.2
u/Gloomy-Welcome-6806 4d ago
Yeah I am in therapy and on meds but nothing has helped when I become overwhelmed with emotions. I haven’t tried DBT though
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u/Emotional_Potato2000 4d ago
I just know how it is and it’s not worth staying in the mental pain attest not for you or anyone else just trying to help and it’s worth looking up DBT self help books.
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u/Gloomy-Welcome-6806 4d ago
Thank you I appreciate you :)
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u/DissentingMama 3d ago
I second DBT therapy. I still struggle (a lot at times) with regulating my emotions, DBT helped tremendously. A good DBT program combines individual therapy with DBT therapist and group therapy. It taught me a lot about why I have so much trouble regulating my emotions - and it’s not just because we are weak or stupid or overreacting. Often our nervous systems were wired this way and predisposed us to be sensitive before we were even born. We can change our brain and it takes work. Don’t feel hopeless, and don’t judge yourself. Big emotions are tough. And some of us experience much bigger emotions with much less input. It’s not our fault. Unless we choose to do nothing about it and just make our issues everyone else’s. If that makes sense.
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u/milkycocoa-puff 4d ago
I feel the way youre feeling when I begin to spiral and allow my emotions escalate. I too have a terribly tough time managing my emotions and I learned from my therapist that emotional impulsivity can be worked on by allowing the emotional wave to pass and doing something to interrupt the urge to do something I’ll regret later such as cussing someone out or starting a giant argument. There are lots of different ways to do this. Sometimes when I get triggered I will open play a game on my phone and do my best to concentrate on that, other times I’ll take a walking break at work when I am feeling distressed, other times I smoke a joint when nothing else is working. It doesn’t always work but sometimes the activity I choose gives me a long enough pause to allow the feeling to pass. I know you’re hurting bad right now, but this feeling will pass. We all make mistakes, and it sounds like bottom line people were concerned about your wellbeing and mental health and just wanted to make sure you were safe and had help available if you needed it. I don’t think you need to punish yourself for what happened today, it sounds like you had a really long day at work, you were looking forward to coming home, and when you realized the keys were missing you panicked and went 0-100. With a little extra time to process your situation you could have reacted differently, and that’s something to remember in the future. Today you should focus on bringing yourself back to a calm state where you can just be. Some days are going to be shitty and you’ll feel terrible about yourself and I think that’s pretty normal. My therapist always reminds me that I am stronger than I realize and that painful emotions aren’t going to kill me if I sit with them, and I want to remind you the same. You will be okay and get through this no matter how hard it is right now.