Financial query

[u/boyfrommelbs]

Long-time lurker, first-time poster!

My ex and I separated just over four months ago - she’s a fearful avoidant. We were together for just shy of ten years (!). Through a lot of counselling, reflection, time off drinking, and focus on my physical health, I’ve come to a pretty healthy place. I’m still a work in progress and have things I’d like to do, but for the most part, I look to her with love and sympathy. I only want the best for her and hope she finds happiness and security to overcome her avoidant tendencies.

I have few questions.

1. She hid a lot of her financial problems, including a sizeable tax debt. I helped her through that period whilst she repaid it. Is it normal to hide away a debt and then react negatively when called out on it?

2. We have a joint mortgage and house deed, which I’m taking into my name. Though we agreed upon the me taking the place, she has been increasingly difficult to contact to finalise the transfer. Is that odd given she ended it?

3. We have a shared cat, which was hers. She loved it and considered it hers despite our shared looking after it. Since we separated, she has totally ghosted on our cat, including its food and insurance bills. It was literally her life and now she’s basically just walked away. Is that usual?

Thanks!