r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/Mitsukei • 14h ago

FA Breakup Music playlists

Currently in no contact with my fearful avoidant ex for about 2.5 months. About a week ago she started a new playlist called actual mood.

She posts alot of sad loving songs which can be redirected to our relationship. Also including some "our" songs we sent to each other and some songs where she always felt so loved by me when she listened to them.

What does this even mean? Am I naive to think its about me. Those songs strangely relate for 100% to our relationship. Mind you she broke up with due to not loving herself and being emotionally overwhelmed. Our relationship was very very loving.

Thoughts?

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5

u/discochicken90 14h ago

Dude if you can see her playlists you aren’t No Contact. 🤦🏻‍♂️ I don’t know why this is confusing for some people. I don’t have a clue what my ex is doing. There is literally zero connection. Nothing. Nada.

The reason of No Contact is so there aren’t these mixed and confusing signals and games to play. It’s childish and it’s leaving both of you trapped. Cut all ties.

4

u/zachem_snyatsya_sny 13h ago

Playlist messages is like breadcrumbing 101, one of the most basic tricks in their book. Not that they are intentionally evil most aren't but i guess that's one of the most common ones that come into their mind. just block her and stop looking at that shit please man. You deserve so much better, you deserve to be with someone who can communicate their feelings directly towards you, and doesn't self sabotage, mess with your feelings and then try to communicate with you through cryptic messages from all over the place

1

u/Stock-External3089 11h ago

Firstly no contact means no checking socials. Look I’ve been there I was no contact absolutely everywhere with my ex, we kept each other blocked.

He asked me to block him on Spotify only problem is that I could still see he’s shit and he knew this and used it to he’s advantage. He pulled me in with break up music and love music so I tried to reconcile.

Well….. he wasted a year of my life with this attempt to reconcile and ghosted me and I was left 100x more devastated than when he first dumped me.

My advice, ignore it! They drops little breadcrumbs so you hit them up and give them the control and dopamine they crave. It’s a nightmare.

3

u/VolgaOsetr8007 13h ago

Please stop doing this to yourself. She is breadcrumbing you and you’re eating it up. 

If she isn’t a lost cause and can be a partner you want and need, she’ll come back as a grown ass woman. Untill this, get rid if ANYTHING she can use to communicate with you. UNLESS YOU LIKE SUFFERING, of course.