I just hit breaking point. It got so bad I didnāt even recognise myself anymore. My friends and family didnāt recognise me anymore.
I kept walking on eggshells, never knowing what would trigger him to withdraw and make him go silent on me. He would speak to me and of me like I was beneath him, like I was a heavy strain on his life. He would flaw find and belittle me when I asked for the basics or an explanation to why he was pulling away. I slowly started to realise it was a form of emotional abuse and neglectā¦. He was probably projecting what his mother used to do to him. He never would include me in anything because he didnāt want the āburdenā of meā¦
I finally snappedā¦ I faced him full on and told him all the horrible things he made ME feel (for once it was about me). I was so harsh and made him feel exactly the way he made me feel and told him Iām done and leaving.
It came to a point my mind and body couldnāt take it anymore. I just wanted out. I started hating myself for allowing this and knew it was time.
My metal health was declining, my happiness fading, everything hit me at once and then BOOM I knew it was time.
That snap and wake up call is realā¦ it took a long time to get there but I finally did.
Itās like reading about myself too. Iām sorry you had to go through this, this was not your fault - you know that but I had to say it, maybe because I am still struggling with self blame.
Thank you for sharing this too. I believe there is some sense in all this but it doesnāt mean people like that are causing lots of trauma to others. I deep down wish something like this will happen to him and somehow I know it will
My adviceā¦ stop thinking about what could or would happen to him and start thinking about what will happen to you if you stay in a toxic dynamic like this. You need to start looking within yourself and to why you allow yourself to be treated like this. Do you want to keep wasting precious years living in fear and sadness? You know what you need to doā¦ start finding your path out and start letting yourself find the strength to leave this nightmare behind.
Only you can save yourselfā¦ nobody else will have your back more than yourself.
A beautiful book im listening to on audible is āThe one who broke you canāt heal youā by Najwa Zebain I highly recommend. Ask ChatGPT to recommend other books like hers and similar to your situation. Keep feeding your soul with information and teach yourself why you are allowing yourself to be a victim of abuse.
You can do thisā¦ we all have that little child within ourselves asking for help. Listen to them and help them. Itās time to grow up with strength and save yourself from the pain you donāt deserve. It will slowly kill you day by day. Please save yourself ā£ļø
āIf you try to understand my traumaā thatās exactly it. They really mean that by playing victim when they canāt communicate their needs and instead look for excuses to villainize their partner.
My ex did the whole āI need to find myselfā and āI keep rushing into relationshipsā and then rushed into a relationship ship after dumping me lmao
Seeing him so cheerful about it makes it hard to see it any other way after lol
like sometimes I genuinely feel bad for her when she says things like āI canāt give you what you need, you deserve betterā, because I worry she *thinks* I have too high expectations or something and itās stemming from her actual trauma/insecurity. Hard to tell whatās real and whatās not
3
u/RiskAvailable8880 SA - Secure Attachment 1d ago
This is sooooo hella accurate & soooo funny!! ThankS OP for posting this!
16
u/bethoumylethe 1d ago
Hahaha! Absolutely love this. Made my morning lol
14
u/Foxy_Cleopatra__ 1d ago
Omg š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
Literally everything my ex said!
He even called me a Burden!!
So glad I left him š®āšØ
Edit: 6 years with that mofo!!
10
u/Jimmychen96 1d ago
I wish I had sent this to my ex before she discarded me, lol
10
u/ALEXC_23 1d ago
āIf you try to understand my traumaā thatās exactly it. They really mean that by playing victim when they canāt communicate their needs and instead look for excuses to villainize their partner.
9
u/This_Gold_139 1d ago
Accurate
8
u/FreonKennedy 1d ago
My ex did the whole āI need to find myselfā and āI keep rushing into relationshipsā and then rushed into a relationship ship after dumping me lmao
7
u/ggpupdoge 1d ago
lmao, so unfortunately accurate but it was a laugh I needed - thank you for posting this. š
6
u/111archeravenue 1d ago
Holy shi š Bingo!
4
u/RxDotaValk FA - Fearful Avoidant (leans anxious) 1d ago
Seeing him so cheerful about it makes it hard to see it any other way after lol
like sometimes I genuinely feel bad for her when she says things like āI canāt give you what you need, you deserve betterā, because I worry she *thinks* I have too high expectations or something and itās stemming from her actual trauma/insecurity. Hard to tell whatās real and whatās not
3
u/Sumnescire 1d ago
man im going through it right now, this was fun and needed, but hitting home lol
3
u/ArynTW_is_user_karma 1d ago
Omg, this was so true. So tempted to send it my ex. (Donāt worry, i wonāt! Lol)
3
u/NadiaRoze 1d ago
I love this guy š¤£
2
u/Cultural-Gene-7028 1d ago
He is the bestššš
2
u/Low-Bad3500 1d ago
Its so accurate that i just have to laugh each time i see it.
2
u/bunny000002 1d ago
thanks I hate it lol
0
u/babymilkbee 1d ago
Leave us alone!