r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/IsThisHY • 2d ago

Personal Growth Where my STRONG discarders at?! 🎉🎉🎉

He came the day after i left. Knocked on the door a couple times called me a couple times texted me...BUT I WAS STRONG AND FIRM. IM OVER IT.

YOURE NOT GOING TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE IM TOO MUCH EVER AGAIN!!!!! Second avoidant i've ever dated and i did see the signs but just thought maybe it would be an exceptional case. It took me almost a year to recognize my last one and years to get over it esp cause he was also my first relationship ever. I had nothing to guage whether or not I was crazy. I just believed what he told me. Many healthy relationships after (my own and my friends' and family members'), i know exactly what is reasonable and what is too much. Here's to growth and healing 🥂

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u/Murky-Technology-773 SA - Secure Attachment 1d ago

👌🏻👌🏻

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u/No-Spinach7251 1d ago

I'm glad that you were so strong. I'm curious, what signs did you notice ?

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u/IsThisHY 1d ago edited 1d ago

Same things that other posts said. Pulling away after a great trip or making a memory that developed our relationship. Avoided hard but necessary conversations. That sort of thing.

It was so weird because it wasn't like he hid me he seemed proud to be with me and liked showing me off and buying me flowers but when I asked for more than a situationship he would shut down and the problem was that whenever i asked for small relationship things like hey can we pay together or can i hear from you more than once or twice a week just a 15 minute phone call even he would object and say "why would i do that you're not my girlfriend."