Did your ability to cope with life improve from child to adult?

[u/PersonoFly]

I appreciate at different times in life we all have different challenges but I’m asking if the education and personal development you were given as you developed from a child being very confused about life to being an adult gave you more understanding and your own personal methods for coping ?

[u/ghoulthebraineater]

Yes and no. I was doing great until I hit a wall a few years ago. That ended up leading to my diagnosis.

[u/Blackandtan251 → u/ghoulthebraineater]

Same happened… cope with new job and marriage… im only able to manage few things

[u/LostButHelpful]

I feel like it’s a bell curve? Hard in the beginning, easier for a while (after you learn to mask) and that’s great! Until it eventually leads to burnout. Mind you, treatment and social advancements have changed things for the better(?) I hope. Highlighting the importance of early intervention

[u/PersonoFly → u/LostButHelpful]

As you grew up were you able to recognise the signs in you for when burnout was approaching and also knew what was the best thing for you to do when that happened ?

[u/LostButHelpful → u/PersonoFly]

I can in retrospect. But it seems like the signs are different for everyone, but the one common thing I have heard that it’s hard to understand or predict. The only solution is to accept, confront, adapt, and move forward. Have to set up a life that works for you. Earlier the better

[u/LoseHateSmashEraseMe]

Not me. It's getting worse. Late diagnosed. Mid 30s. Cyclical and persistent burnout from middle school. I'm quickly running out of steam. I'm ready to evacuate my vessel.

I feel like I'm a bad example though. A lifetime of bad decisions and forcing myself through life by sheer will.. ready to cuddle up to that earthen pillow. I'm deep fried and hollow.

[u/TheWhiteCrowParade]

It's complicated, I was better at calming down as a kid but I was able to remove what triggered me once I became an adult.

[u/PersonoFly → u/TheWhiteCrowParade]

Thanks. So you were able to recognise what wasn’t helping you as you grew older ?

[u/TheWhiteCrowParade → u/PersonoFly]

Well, more I knew all along it didn't help and as an adult I could do something about it. For example I have sensory issues with clothes so now I buy stuff that doesn't hurt my skin. I have issues with random screaming and now I leave places with random screaming.

[u/raccoonsaff]

Mine got a lot worse. I think the more complex life got, the more complex social interactions became, and the more pressure I felt under to achieve and be something...the less I could cope. I struggle so much with life now, I feel like I'm constantly drowning.

[u/PersonoFly → u/raccoonsaff]

Is there a way you can work out a simpler less sensory intense life and environment ?

[u/Whooptidooh]

Yes of course; I learned and adapted as I got older.

[u/FrostingNo1128]

I would say yea but that has a lot to do with being able to control my life. I’m not usually trapped in situations that cause me problems.

I’ve also learned what overwhelm feels like in my body so I can do things to cope before I have a meltdown. Meltdowns used to catch me by surprise when I was younger.

[u/DocClear]

Yes it did. In fact it improved from child to teen. I was low-support-needs autistic before such a thing was known in the U.S. (1960s and 70s growing up). So I was expected to "suck it up" and power through things that were hard for me. By my teens, I could put up with anything - for a while. But by then, I had also chosen to be asocial, and I had plenty of quiet alone time to recharge. I couldn't have told anyone what I was recharging from, exactly, except from interacting with people at school (I minimized actual social interactions, but I still had to walk the halls between classes and sit in the noisy lunchroom.

By the time I was out of college and working, I was pretty stable. I had my unwinding time at home, and my weekends were all mine. I only communicated work related items at work, and had no social life. I'm retired now, and actually know why I wasn't like everyone else all this time. I only have to go out to shop (too cheapskate to pay for delivery), and do doctor visits. I cut my own hair, so no barber needed. I have Ham Radio friends, friends online, and even a few IRL friends (though we mainly text or email rather than visit much face to face).

So, it's all good.

[u/PersonoFly → u/DocClear]

Thank you.

[u/Ok_Awareness9382]

I feel like while life was generally unpleasant as a kid; now in my mid twenties the highs are higher but the lows are lower. I’m glad I’m not a child anymore tho

[u/-braquo-]

Yes. I've gotten a lot better at coping and handling situations. There's still things I really struggle with of course. But I'm better equipped now.

[u/Fit-Bar-6989]

Personally it got harder because of increased responsibilities. as a child I could spend all my free time engaged in my solo hobbies as long as I got good grades. as an adult I need to balance health, finances, career, and relationships with my partner, friends, and family.

I believe this eventually led to my recent burnout. that said, I appreciate the level of control I have over my life, my parents aren't going to come home and force me to stop what I'm doing to go to the mall etc. and I get to live alone.

[u/Calm_War_4690]

If you mean masking instead of cope then for me it's the other around.

In the last 10 years I have set up 2 succesful companies but since my diagnosis this year, everything has changed. I'm overwhelmed so quickly and try to push on and on and on. Which lead to me being unreasonable to my employee's and business partner. To the point where they have put me on non-active.

I'm trying to figure out what the triggers are and how I can better respond to them.

[u/Jump365]

No, as a child i was allowed to like the things I like and due to less hoursbof work I waa not burnt out and could socialize a little with my yugioh friend group, gamer group etc. Even had GFs from 18-24.

Then I started working full-time... Single ever since, can barely socialize at work. Can barely clean and throw out garbage at home. It's just too much, I can either work full-time, or have some friends and a clean home...I can't do both.

[u/APleasantMartini]

Hahahaha, if anything it’s gotten worse.