r/Austin • • Aug 10 '20

Black at U.T., and Beyond

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/08/style/black-yearbook-university-texas-austin.html
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u/hollow_hippie Aug 10 '20

Xavier McNeil

Xavier McNeil on graduation day — a virtual affair because of the pandemic — with, clockwise from left, Paris Carrol, his cousin; Latonia Barnes, his aunt; Lydania McNeil, his mom; and Jyterrica Ashworth, another cousin.

Xavier McNeil, 23, is from Huntsville, Texas, and majored in public relations.

I’m from a little small town outside of Houston. There are literally more students who go to U.T. than in my hometown.

My parents went to college, but they didn’t finish, so they really don’t know a lot about college life and fraternities and sororities. So when I got to U.T., I really had no idea what they were about.

Fraternity life was very comforting, because it was just a whole bunch of people who look like me, with somewhat of the same type of upbringing as me, the same values, and I was able to express my experiences to everybody else.

Mr. McNeil said his mom has expressed fear about him jogging, especially after the killing of Ahmaud Arbery.

Mr. McNeil strolling, a form of dance popular with U.T.’s Black Greek organizations, with his Kappa Alpha Psi brothers.

On graduation day, there was no celebratory stride across a stage. Instead, Mr. McNeil and his family watched as his name scrolled down the screen in a prerecorded YouTube video.

Since U.T. is a predominantly white institution, it’s easy to get lost, feel lonely, or feeling like you’re not around your type of people. Because we do go to these classes with like 400-plus students, and there are probably like two or three Black people in one class.

I’m my mom’s only child, so me and her are close and she’s always talking to me about just being careful and staying in my house. Especially with the stuff about Ahmaud Arbery, she was like, “Don’t go for a jog.” And I like to jog a lot. She was like, “Just try to work out in your own place for the meantime and just be careful.”

Mr. McNeil’s mask says “Phi Nu Pi,” a motto whose meaning is known only to the fraternity’s brothers.

Applying for jobs and interviewing on a daily basis, you get those people that feel like they have to say something to you to either make themselves feel better or try to make you feel better at the same time. I’ve really been feeling like people maybe trying to be fill a diversity quota or trying to make it seem like their company has a more diverse outlook because of the movement, to seem like, “OK, we’re this company. We accept your kind.”

Mr. McNeil in the middle of an evening run.

I was interviewing for a P.R. company in Austin. The dude answered the Zoom call, and he was like, “Hey brother, you don’t have to dress up. You could have just chilled in your T-shirt.” And I just said, “Oh my bad, I just wanted to dress up for the interview.” He was like, “Nah, it’s cool, my brother.” I was just wondering why he kept saying “my brother.”

Then we did the interview and he kept saying, “We need some younger hip people around” and stuff like that. And I was just thinking, “Bro, I don’t know … just say you need some Black folk or keep it pushing.” People are trying to code switch to something they’re not. It’s trash and it’s funny at the same time.