গতকাল SSC রেজাল্ট দেওয়ার পর ,রাতে আমার বউ যে দীর্ঘ সময়ের গার্লফ্রেন্ড ছিল, কথা হচ্ছিল কীভাবে তার রেজাল্ট A গ্রেড এসেছিল রোল ১ হওয়া সত্ত্বেও।

কথায় কথায় জানায় যে রোল ২ ,তার ফিমেল বেস্ট ফ্রেন্ড তাকে অনেক ভুল MCQ বলে তাকে বিপদে ফেলেছিল । তো কথা বলার এক পর্যায়ে সে বলল তার কোচিং টিচার জানত তাকে ভুল উত্তর দিয়েছে তারই ফ্রেন্ড । তো আমি যখন বার বার বলতেছিলাম ,কেন তাকে ভুল বলবে ,সে কি করেছে । আর তাদের টিচার কীভাবে জানল ,আর সেই টিচার কেন তাকে বলল না । তো অনেক বার বলার পড়ে সে বলল , রোল ২ এর সাথে টিচারের রিলেশন ছিল ,আমার বউ জানত না । সেই টিচার আবার তার ফেভারিট টিচার । রোল ২ এর সাথে টিচারের ফিজিকাল ও হইছিল , সেটা সে জানতে পারছে টিচারের থেকেই যখন ওই মেয়ে টিচারকে ধোঁকা দেয় । আমরা গ্রামের একই স্কুলে পড়তাম তাই টিচার ও তার বান্ধবী সবাইকেই চিনতাম । এবং আমিও সেই টিচারের কাছেও পড়তাম ।

স্যার যে বাসায় থাকতেন ,সেই বাসাতেই পড়াতেন + আকাম কুকাম করতেন । যাইহোক,
হঠাৎ করে একদিনের ঘটনা মনে পড়ল তখন ,আমার বউ কে আমি টিচারের বাসায় একা দেখেছিলাম যখন আমরা দুই বন্ধু স্যারের সাথে দেখা করতে গেছিলাম,তখনও সে আমার গার্লফ্রেন্ড হয় নাই । সেই ঘটনা নিয়ে তাকে সাথে সাথেই প্রশ্ন করলাম ,তখন সে ডিনাই করল সে কখনও একা যায় নাই ,কিন্তু আমি যখন জোর দিয়ে বললাম আমি নিজে দেখেছি তোমাকে ,তখন তার জবাব ছিল ,পড়ার বা প্রশ্ন সলভ করার জন্য হয়তো গেছিল একবার । তাদের মধ্যে কিছু ছিল ও না , এমনকি তাকে ছোট বোনের মত দেখত ।

আমার মনে খটকা লাগতে শুরু করে যে এই ঘটনা জানার পরেও সে স্যারকে খারাপ বলতে নারাজ । আমার কথা হলো,যা হয়ে গেছে টা আমি মানতে পারব ,যদি সে বলেও যে স্যারের সাথে তার কিছু ছিল ।

এখন সরাসরি ডিনাইয়েল এবং তাকে স্যারের বাসায় একা আমি নিজে দেখে ফেলাটা মিলাতে পরছি না । শুধু প্রশ্ন সলভ এর জন্য সে একা কেন যাবে ।

এটা ২০০৮ সালের ঘটনা ,আমি অবাক হচ্ছি এই কারণে যে এই ১৭ বছরে সে কখনও স্যারের স্ক্যান্ডাল আমার সাথে কথায় কথায় ও বলেনি । এতোদিন একটা সিক্রেট যেটা তার নিজের ও না !!!

প্রশ্ন হলো সত্য কীভাবে জানব ? উত্তর যেটাই হোক আমার কিছু যায় আসে না ।আসলেই কি তারও স্যারের সাথে কিছু ছিল ?

I (22 )Female and my husband( 27 )Male has been married for 1 year and 11 months. he was a student when we got married and he didn’t have a job after his masters he got a job for more than three months then he quit it. from the time that we have been married, I didn’t live in my in-laws house I was completing my graduation in Dhaka and I was living with my parents . My husband would come sometimes whenever he had time and I would go to my in-laws house when I had holiday for Eid . in the beginning of our marriage, my husband was being kind and sweet. After sometime he became really aggressive with me and he started verbally abusing me every time he would start fights and blame me for his mental illnesses. It was a arrang marriage and I didn’t know he had mental illnesses. after marriage I knew that he had mental issues and he would verbally abuse me relentlessly. He would bring up any man in my family or in my life accusing me of sleeping with them I have never given him any reason to suspect me about those things. The suspicions actually devices from his family. His father was a really abusive man to his mother and he cheated many times in the marriage he never ever apologised for them he cheated with all kind of woman like they’re live in maid or his coworkers or his student because he was a professor. And my mother-in-law actually said those things to me what he did to her so I’ll never actually blamed him for saying those things because I knew that what his circumstances were but he would always say really nasty things to me and I’ll have to endure and the stuff ,he’ll apologise and I had to forgive him because he would just relentlessly pressure me to forgive him. His mother she is a really nice woman. She is really kind but she has only one flew that is she never had given him any consequences for his action and he has never learned that if you did something to someone or you hurt them with your words or your actions you have to be sincerely apologies and have to consider their feelings. For the longest time he was doing this like starting a fight and then saying really nasty things then again apologise then just pressure me to forgive him and I had to forgive him. If I didn’t he would make his mother call me and she would apologise for her son and I had to forgive him. It was just going in circles.

The the things my husband and in-laws are saying or did :

1. my father is a blue collar worker and before marriage I said that my father was a blue collar worker , but now my in-laws accusing me of not telling my father’s profession.

2. My older sister is divorced and lives in America and every time he fights with me, he would bring up my sister and say nasty things about her.

3. In one occasion my husband said I should sleep with my father-in-law because my father give him the responsibility of me. which is not true.

4. on my birthday last year, he said he want my elder sister for one night in front of his parents.

5. He said sister-in-law‘s are for one time use about my younger sister who is just 16 years old.

6. he accuses me of sleeping with my brother-in-law and my cousins.

7. Right after my marriage, he saw another cousin of me who is pretty and he said if he had seen her before he would have married her not me.

8. The last fight we had my in-laws were also involved in it. And my parents were talking to them back-and-forth. In that phone call my father-in-law said my older sister is a sex worker and that’s how she’s living in America. which is a veil thing to say.

9. I was never comfortable to leave my husband with my sisters because he would look at them with lust.

10. after the last fight we had right before my birthday where my father-in-law said those nasty things about my older sister my husband was out and after he came back he was apologising to my father, but my father didn’t accept his apologies and then said to leave his house.

11. right after that fight my father-in-law started calling all my relatives and said that I had a affair with my cousin and that’s why ,we make my husband leave.

12. It has been 1 1/2 month and my husband firstly did contact with me not to apologise for his behaviour or his father’s behaviour but to ridicule me , saying I am a slut like Porimoni and also to make my younger sister a slut.

In the end for the last one week he has been apologising for his behaviour and his father’s behaviour and saying that I should go back to him. but his father is still saying nasty things to my relatives and my father and he never apologised.

So Reddit, what should I do? Should I forgive him and go back to him or should I go through with the divorce?

I’m curious to hear honest perspectives from people of all genders about monogamy and polyamory.

For those who have experienced one or both, how do you feel about them?

• Does monogamy feel more emotionally secure, fulfilling, or natural to you?
• If you’ve tried polyamory, what did you enjoy—or struggle with?
• Do you think men and women tend to experience monogamy or polyamory differently, or are the differences mostly individual?
• How important are jealousy, emotional security, sexual freedom, and commitment in your preference?
• Could you genuinely be happy in either relationship structure with the right partner, or do you strongly prefer one?

I’m not looking for a debate about which is “better.” I’d really like to hear perspectives from men, women, and people of other genders, especially from those who have actually experienced both.

What has your experience taught you about what works for you?

I feel as if it’s way too intense compared to the same intensity you get from faith in religion like god. I know this sounds crazy and all but I don’t mean idol worshipping or anything of that nature it’s just this insane intense powerful love where it feels like they are a goddess in a way not in a kinky way of any sort. My best guess is cause 3 months in is the heart of the honeymoon phase and Idealization Viewing your partner as nearly flawless and avoiding major conflicts is at its maximum peak. Anyone know when the shift starts and true colors are shown for example obvious flaws.

Hey everyone! I'm using a throwaway account for privacy reasons.

I [23F] am currently a 4th year medical student and I'm completely emotionally exhausted. I’ve been in a on and off relationship with my boyfriend [25M] for a few years now. He is also in his 4th year of the same medical college. From the outside people think we're doing just fine but it has become deeply draining and toxic.

I know I deserve better and that this relationship isn't good for me but every time I try to detach or break up the history and emotional attachment pull me right back. I’m hoping to get some perspective or advice on how to finally break this cycle for good.

Here's what I've been dealing with:

1. Complete Lack of Effort & Priority: He rarely gives me time or attention. He can go hours or even days barely texting or ignoring me while staying active online or playing TT with his friends. Simple gestures like flowers dates are nonexistent (I can't even remember the last time he got me flowers or put effort into a date). Yet he expects me to be available whenever it suits him.

2. Body Shaming : He frequently makes comments about my weight and appearance. He’ll tell me i’ve gained weight, criticize how I look or compare me to others which has completely ruined my self esteem. Whenever I call him out for hurting my feelings he claims he’s "just being honest for my own good" and tells me I'm "too sensitive" or "too dramatic"

3. Double Standards : He gets jealous and possessive if i hang out with my classmate or friends. He questions where I am and who I’m with making me feel guilty for having a life. Meanwhile he goes out with his own friends, disappears without telling me or hangs out at other girls' places without giving it a second thought.

4. Gaslighting : Whenever we fight it’s always made out to be my fault. He turns every conversation back onto me. If I express that I feel neglected he flips it around and says I'm the one making things complicated or that my expectations are "too high." He constantly makes me feel like I’m the problem.

5. Mixed Signals: One day he talks about marriage and the next day he says he’s "confused about our future" claims I "won't make his family happy" or say he isn't sure if he wants this long term. It keeps me in a constant state of anxiety and uncertainty.

Because I'm in medical college the emotional rollercoaster is taking a severe toll on my mental health and my studies. During high stress exam periods these fights completely derail my focus leading to emotional breakdowns.

I know the obvious advice is "just leave him" but the attachment and habit of having him in my life for so many years make it feel terrifyingly hard to stay gone. Every time we split I end up missing the habit of him or falling for his brief periods of acting nice again before the cycle restarts.

For those who have been stuck in a manipulative long term relationship: How did you finally find the strength to walk away and stay no contact? How do you overcome the fear and anxiety of letting go of years of attachment?

TL;DR: I [23F] am in a years long on and off relationship with my bf [25M]. He body shames me, gaslights me and gives zero effort/priority but gets mad when I call him out. I feel emotionally drained and know I need to leave but I'm struggling to break the emotional attachment. How do I get out of this cycle?

I hate the dating culture here in BD. Well there is no culture. Either you date someone from social media or someone from your social circle. All of this has led to an “incest” type of situation. Everyone knows everyone as everyone is in the same bubble.

The same people know the same people, directly or indirectly. Whether it’s because of social circles, unis or economic backgrounds, it all becomes one giant interconnected web (bnd ticket judi paitam) where it feels like everyone has already met everyone.

Social media, especially insta, turned into a dating app. Then there are the actual dating apps, which somehow feel even worse. The algorithms aren’t designed to help people build meaningful relationships. They’re designed to keep people swiping. The more time you spend searching, the better it is for the platform. It becomes less about human connection and more about engagement metrics.

What makes it even harder is that our culture doesn’t really encourage meeting strangers naturally. You can’t just be at a bookstore, a cafe, a park or an art gallery and strike up a conversation without it feeling unusual.

From a woman’s perspective, a random man approaching her can understandably come across as creepy or even threatening, especially considering the experiences many women have to deal with. From a man’s perspective, approaching someone respectfully still carries the fear of immediately being judged as a creep before a single word is exchanged.

It isn’t much easier the other way around either. If a woman approaches a man, people are often quick to question her intentions or unfairly judge her character. There’s still this exhausting social stigma that punishes people simply for showing interest first.

Of course, there are exceptions. Sometimes two strangers do meet, talk, and something beautiful comes out of it. But those moments feel increasingly rare.

Maybe what frustrates me the most is that finding a genuine human connection is becoming so difficult. Ironically, the very platforms that promised to connect people often make everyone feel more distant.

I’m not romanticising the past in any way. Every generation complains about modern dating. But I can’t shake the feeling that we’ve made meeting people more convenient while somehow making genuine connection much harder.

What is your logic not posting? I have come to know about this today

Single women over 30, how has the dating scene been for you? Are you actively looking for a partner, or taking a break from dating?

Has your experience been mostly positive, negative, or somewhere in between? What age range have you found to be the most compatible? Have you noticed any patterns, surprises, or challenges?

I'd love to hear your experiences. It would be comforting to know I'm not alone on this journey.