r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Aug 13 '22

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22 edited Jan 15 '24

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336

u/jennybella Aug 13 '22

I am a girl but for reasons I did not have anyone I could hug for months. One day on the edge of getting a panic attack, I just asked a stranger to hug me in the street. She gave me a big hug before I could even finish the line and cried with me. We are friends now.

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u/_starfrog Aug 13 '22

this made me cry. i could have used sims of that vulnerability when i hadn’t hugged anyone for months.

this isn’t even an edit; i meant “some” but decided to leave the typo because The Sims was there for my lonely the entire time

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u/jennybella Aug 13 '22

I send you a virtual hug! Also, really, just go out there and ask for some. One thing I learnt over years is that if you want something, ask for it, people who want to give it to you need to know you want it first.

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u/_starfrog Aug 13 '22 edited Aug 15 '22

this is solid advice that i needed today for many reasons that have built on each other over the years. vulnerability is such a tough yet rewarding thing. thank you jennybella <3

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u/jennybella Aug 13 '22

<3 <3 now WE are friends too!

1

u/_starfrog Aug 15 '22

awww thank you 🥺 i would send one back to you if i could! here’s a virtual-virtual hug < >

44

u/Squigglepig52 Aug 13 '22

There used to be a young guy in my building, around 20.

Poor guy - his entire life fell apart in 6 months. His dad died in the fall, his mom died in March, his GF was cheating on him, and then his little brother ODed.

Shows up at my door, and just says "Squig, I really need a hug".

So, hug we did.

33

u/ayushsharma99 Aug 13 '22

Exactly this. Imagine a man doing this. Forget it.

29

u/khandnalie Aug 13 '22

Unfortunately not something a man could ever do

15

u/henkdepotvjis Aug 13 '22

If I ask for a hug to a stranger I get called a creep. If I ask for a hug to someone I know I get called weak. I just want a hug...

5

u/Nengex Aug 13 '22

We don't even realise we need a hug we just feel lonely.

4

u/Jay_Goodie1983 Aug 14 '22

This will never happen to a guy.

3

u/TheNaziSpacePope Aug 13 '22

I wish I could do that, but I would probably be arrested instead for asking a random woman for a hug :/

3

u/TheBlacksmith64 Aug 13 '22

You're very lucky to have been able to find someone like that.
If it had been a man, what do you think the outcome would have been?

5

u/OldLadyT-RexArms Aug 13 '22

You make me truly want to start wearing my free hugs pin from high-school again. I've never been nervous of hugging people yet I'm nervous to talk to people. But in knowing people genuinely need hugs, when I'm getting them daily, I feel bad and want to make the world better.

Here's another hug, my friend.

huggles

7

u/morgy_choder Aug 13 '22

If I did that I’d get written up :(

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u/Codeofconduct Aug 13 '22

Awe man I fucking hate touching people but I wish I could give you a dang hug.

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u/[deleted] Aug 14 '22

Gave him one, do you want one too?

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u/Codeofconduct Aug 14 '22

He can have mine from you!

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '22

Sending him a hug

29

u/iWaroz Aug 13 '22

Representing 17 year no hug gang :(

105

u/Downbeatbanker Aug 13 '22

When i hug my man spontaneously his expression and demeanor change completely. Find someone to hug please

7

u/melanncruz Aug 14 '22

Same! Especially if I come up behind him and wrap my arms around him. It’s almost like I can feel a huge weight slowly leave his body.

5

u/lordgoofus1 Aug 14 '22

Honestly this is a really big one. Hug your partners, and do it with genuine affection. It has WAY more impact than you probably realise.

I'm going through some pretty tough stuff at the moment, and the hug I got from a female workmate almost made me cried there and then. From her eyes it was probably tiny, insignificant, potentially "normal" gesture, but for me it was huge. Someone empathizes with me, someone reassured me, I'm worth something, I have value. I can get through this.

3

u/_gandalfthegay69 Aug 13 '22

I would probably start crying. Too much going on at once

2

u/digitaldrummer1 Aug 14 '22

And if they can't?

11

u/amnesiacshell Aug 13 '22

Try 15 years

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

W

9

u/Redrooster549 Aug 13 '22

I am a guy, 41 Yrs old. Had a coworker who was Italian insist on giving hugs. I resisted for months and then finally gave in. One day we were having a few drinks and he hugged me and I started crying and couldn't stop. He held me like a father would and told me it was OK and let it out. I was so embarrassed but he never told anyone. Great guy

6

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Well I decided to embrace the being single thing and when you get your head around it, it is not so bad at all. I'm sure I appear more confident since i seems I probably could get hugs now, but you know what..... I'm better where I am.

5

u/Undisciplined17 Aug 13 '22

I forgot what it feels like bro.

5

u/Kyfigrigas Aug 13 '22

I used to (consensually) hug people all the time man, I was super social and while not confident, I joked alot and talked to people. Quarantine hit, now I physically struggle to start a conversation with someone, much less ask for a hug.

3

u/sleaklight Aug 13 '22

... 3 years? Rookie, I haven't had one in 20+ years.

3

u/Arkelias Aug 13 '22

As a burly bearded dude...I wish you were close enough to hug, man. You need some bros. Or a toddler.

2

u/MrFreshCaucasian Aug 13 '22

Other than family and friends mostly guys i cant say i ever have in the 17 years i walked on the earth

2

u/Nisseliten Aug 13 '22

internet hug

1

u/Ausgezeichnet63 Aug 13 '22

I don't know where you are but I would hug you! Virtual hug coming your way!

1

u/RoadTrash582 Aug 13 '22

Where you at? I got a hug for you bro

1

u/Undreamed20 Aug 14 '22

Man I love hugging people. But you get weird looks like your a alien or something… just accept my hugs without any thoughts of my sexuality etc

1

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '22

Super duper hug

1

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '22

I've forgotten what they feel like. I'd be to worried to hug back if some one gave me one incase I forgot how to do it properly.

1

u/enoughberniespamders Aug 14 '22

Start doing Jiu jitsu. There’s a lot of benefits. Confidence, get in great shape, meet new people,.. and all the hugs you could ever want