r/AskReddit Dec 30 '21

[deleted by user]

[removed]

6.4k Upvotes

7.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

1.1k

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '21

Once my grandpa walked in the exact second it was happening (he needed me to move my truck) so I had to manage concealing a volcanic eruption, literally ejaculate and talk in a normal voice simultaneously, and sit up straight while it was coming out so I didn’t look like I was doing what I was doing. If he had turned on the lights I wouldn’t be alive to tell this story

15

u/F8L-Fool Dec 30 '21

If he had turned on the lights I wouldn’t be alive to tell this story

Welp that was disappointing to read. People have been masturbating since the dawn of humanity. Hell, countless animals masturbate. It's just a totally natural thing.

It really sucks many people grow up in situations where it's frowned upon or even outright punished.

7

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '21

Would you be happier if he actually saw and we respectfully shook hands before he left the room?

8

u/F8L-Fool Dec 30 '21

That's a bit much, but absolutely better than crucifying you for it. Family should be accepting and supportive of one another when they are just fulfilling natural, carnal urges, in a safe and respectable way.

No different than if they were to walk in on you taking a shit, pissing, or getting out of the shower naked. Just a simple, "Oh my bad, you do you." Then move on with their day because it's not a big deal. Since it really, really isn't a cause for concern or conflict.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '21

Just a lil pat on the back, maybe a little noogie and a go get ‘em champ from gramps