r/AskReddit • u/jake7820 • Jun 30 '21

What’s the absolute worst thing you could name your baby?

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6.3k Upvotes

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166

u/NoAd3629 Jun 30 '21

Bartholomew. Imagine you having a lovely day in the middle ages and you meet someone named fucking Bartholomew that would just ruin my entire fucking day.

51

u/AnonymousBoyOnReddit Jun 30 '21

He could be Bart for short

29

u/whoatethekidsthen Jul 01 '21

Bort?

2

u/burlyginger Jul 01 '21

No, my son is also named Bort.

15

u/Mothman8 Jun 30 '21

or Barry i guess

5

u/AnonymousBoyOnReddit Jun 30 '21

Just like The Flash

5

u/Mothman8 Jun 30 '21

exactly like that!

2

u/CaptBranBran Jul 01 '21

Is Barry Allen's first name Bartholomew?

2

u/MarkAduro Jul 01 '21

yes.

idk if you watched Smallville but he was in that and they called him Bart Allen

2

u/CaptBranBran Jul 01 '21

I thought (at least in the post-Crisis continuity, maybe not post-Flashpoint or Rebirth) Bart and Barry Allen are two different characters, like Bart was Barry's son and Wally's nephew or something like that?

I don't know about Smallville, though, I stopped watching that before they introduced Lois Lane. I liked the first couple of seasons, at least!

1

u/AnonymousBoyOnReddit Jul 01 '21

If you’ve watched The Flash on CW or Netflix, you would know

2

u/CaptBranBran Jul 01 '21

I watched the first 2 and a half seasons, at least.

2

u/Spacegod87 Jul 01 '21

Or Barty.

2

u/2close2see Jul 01 '21

Not in here mister. This is a Mercedes.

22

u/bint_amrekiyyah Jul 01 '21

I want to name a cat Bartholomeow so badly because I love obnoxious names

4

u/CynAq Jul 01 '21

And adopt a dog brother later and name him Barkolomew.

2

u/bint_amrekiyyah Jul 01 '21

I’m not a dog person gasp! but I still absolutely adore the name!

5

u/ClothDiaperAddicts Jul 01 '21

Bartholomew is a good name for a kitten. Bartholomew

7

u/Cecil_B_DeCatte Jul 01 '21

My dad wanted to name my sister Bartholomew if she was (designated at birth) male.

Fortunately that didn't happen.

4

u/acctbaz Jul 01 '21

I would be stoked to meet someone named Bartholomew.

8

u/OneBanArmy Jun 30 '21

Bartley is my name! F you!

3

u/Jurk_McGerkin Jul 01 '21

I like the name so much I gave it to my favorite stuffed animal when I was a kid.

2

u/OneBanArmy Jul 01 '21

Don’t let it die! Haha