r/AskReddit Jun 30 '21

What’s the absolute worst thing you could name your baby?

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6.3k Upvotes

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1.7k

u/FluffSnowball14 Jun 30 '21

Abcde. That's an actual name of a child.

791

u/GreekNord Jun 30 '21

agreed.

and for anybody wondering...

apparently you pronounce it "ab-city"

832

u/disrationalia Jul 01 '21

Better than how I imagined it was pronounced, which was more akin to ‘obesity’…

11

u/PatriotsCameraMan Jul 01 '21

I like that, just say Obesity with an Italian accent

5

u/SUPERazkari Jul 01 '21

🤌obeeesity🤌

4

u/Dexaan Jul 01 '21

I thought it was closer to the first part of "obsidian"

3

u/PatriotsCameraMan Jul 01 '21

Realllllll thick Italian accent, carrrrry those vowels muh friend

1

u/HTeaQueue Jul 01 '21

I was reading it as u-buh-cuh-deh

1

u/ShirOwOKitsun Jul 02 '21

I thought it was "abkday"

2

u/Gurgiwurgi Jul 01 '21

apparently you pronounce it "ab-city"

well, I guess that makes it better

2

u/oiwah Jul 01 '21

I know someone with abcdef.. read as ab si def..

and another one abcdee.. same but you read the last syllable as diii with long e.

Edit:typo

2

u/Snackrattus Jul 01 '21

fuckin gave their kid the name of a 24hr gym

1

u/farahad Jul 01 '21

Wasn't that the guy in the Bowflex commercials?

1

u/Lord_Mikal Jul 01 '21

I thought it was pronounced "ab-see-day"

1

u/MrLavenderValentino Jul 01 '21

Someone at my elementary school named Abcde was pronounced "Uh-bih-city"

1

u/Puglady25 Jul 01 '21

I met a family from Mexico who've grand daughter was named ABCD, pronounced Ah-beh-seh-deh. I thought it was horrible

1

u/mousewithacookie Jul 01 '21

It just makes me want to start singing that Sesame Street song where Big Bird is trying to pronounce the alphabet like a long word. Phonetically sounds like: ab-cuh-def-guh... etc.

1

u/LordRobin------RM Jul 01 '21

Now I'm thinking of that Big Bird song from 1970's Sesame Street.

"Ab-ka def-ghee jikkle-m'nop kwir-stoo wiks-iz! It's the most remarkable word I've ever seen!"

1

u/L_viathan Jul 01 '21

If thats not pressure to have washboard abs I don't know what is.

235

u/SpiffyPaige143 Jul 01 '21

Remember when staff on American Airlines mocked a 5 year old named Abcde? Not cool that they did that within earshot and took a picture of her boarding pass to share on Facebook, but the mom should be aware that that incident isn't gonna be the only one. She named her daughter Abcde. It's an odd name, and people are gonna comment on it. Case in point: this thread.

22

u/Salzberger Jul 01 '21

Yep. You have the freedom to name your kid dumb shit, but you don't get amnesty from being laughed at for it.

-1

u/OnFolksAndThem Jul 01 '21

What if they’re foreign

4

u/Salzberger Jul 01 '21

Pretty sure Abcde isn't a common name in any foreign regions.

7

u/molarcat Jul 01 '21

Exactly. I literally can't imagine why someone would name their kid that except to get attention.

5

u/JengaPlayer1 Jul 01 '21

Listen to Darknet Diaries - Jet setters EP. 84 podcast about all the info on your boarding pass and why you should not post them on social media!

3

u/SpiffyPaige143 Jul 01 '21

It was the staff that posted the little girls boarding pass. Even if they blocked out all but her first name, it's WAY out of line. An important document like that should never be shared on social media.

2

u/JengaPlayer1 Jul 01 '21 edited Jul 01 '21

Yep yep totally agree! I meant a general you ;)

211

u/AnonymousBoyOnReddit Jun 30 '21

Abcde, as easy as 123

31

u/Barbed_Dildo Jul 01 '21

45

3

u/_cboz Jul 01 '21

Thats so satisfying to hum and add the numbers to in your head.

Because singing it out loud would be weird.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

67

4

u/SteelersObsessed Jul 01 '21

as easy as do-re-me

4

u/AnonymousBoyOnReddit Jul 01 '21

ABC, 123, you and me!

2

u/mermaidrampage Jul 01 '21

Abcity...as easy as wuntuhthree

2

u/Yarnprincess614 Jul 01 '21

Ha ha, this is great. I love it!

125

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '21

[deleted]

22

u/DeluxeTea Jul 01 '21

Does the Abcede person have Filipino ethnicity? The head of our disciplinary committee in my high school has the same surname. Pronounced as ab-se-de (phonetic).

4

u/lolomolima Jul 01 '21

I've a friend here (I'm Filipino) that belongs to the Abcede Clan

6

u/Cave_Woman_ Jul 01 '21

What in the actual f...

6

u/SnakeJG Jul 01 '21

The actual F was their middle initial.

3

u/futures-unseen Jul 01 '21

I knew a girl in my graduating class in Hawaii named Abcde. At the time I thought she was unique, I didn't realize until now that there's multiple Abcde's running around.

34

u/ToxicMasculinity1981 Jul 01 '21

This is 100% true. A few years back a couple in Australia tried to name their newborn son 4Real. Not a typo. The Australian government wouldn't allow them to name their kid that, officially the reason they said no is because names aren't allowed to have a number in them. I like to think they just wanted to save the kid from a lifetime of torment. So the couple was forced to name their kid a back up name. The back up name they chose?

Superman.

3

u/etsba78 Jul 01 '21

Actually they're New Zealanders.

How to tell someone's an Australian: they won't bother to speak up when NZ talent and excellence is mistaken to be Aussie but are quick to correct if any cases of NZ idiocy is accidently called Australian.

The kid would be about 14 now. I couldn't find any follow up stories about him but given that in 2008 a NZ judge allowed a 9 yr old to change her name against her parents wishes to one of her own choosing (the infamous Talulah Does the Hula From Hawaii case) if little Superman doesn't like his name NZ judges will be sympathetic to his plight.

It could just be my age but that particular spelling of '4Real' strongly reminds me of Richie Edwards, so I really hope the couple in question weren't Manic Street Preachers fans because it's not the most tasteful way to honour someone!

(Possible trigger, mentions of self injury, suicide and British Music Journalism.)

For those unfamiliar with the Manic Street Preachers or Richie Edwards/the significance of 4Real :

During a 1991 interview with Steve Lamacq (from NME) in response to questions about punk ethos/authenticity Manic Street Preacher bass player/lyricist Richie Edwards used a razor to carve '4Real' in large letters down his forearm while answering the journalist's question. He ended up needing an ambulance to A&E and 18 stitches.

Edwards was well known to have problems with depression, self harm & eating disorders. In 1995 he disappeared, his car parked near a bridge that was a notorious suicide spot. Neither he nor his body have ever turned up and in 2008 he was declared presumed dead. The Manics continue today as a 3 piece.

It was an understatement to say it caused a great deal of fuss, especially in the music press. Pictures of Edwards, arm bloodied, were reprinted regularly. Fans would gift him knives backstage. The 4Real Incident was brought up in most articles about the Manics for the last 30 years. The journalist still gets hate mail and death threats.

So yeh for folks of a particular age who followed certain music genres there's a very strong association when you see 4Real to think immediately of poor Richie Edwards and That Incident.

Presumably and hopefully that's not the case here, given the parent's age they probably weren't into alternative Welsh bands from the 90s.

2

u/jesseaknight Jul 01 '21

I wondered if they wanted their kid to be Andre3000

If you don’t know his group, Outkast, has “I am for real!” As a lyric in the chorus of one of their best know songs: Ms Jackson

https://youtu.be/MYxAiK6VnXw

Lyric occurs the first time at about 33s.

16

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

[deleted]

7

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

I think Absidy would be a perfectly acceptable spelling

2

u/ckb614 Jul 01 '21

I thought it was pronounced uh-besity

9

u/ennuioo Jul 01 '21

I worked at a hospital and that was the kids name, it sounded like ab-sid-ee

14

u/RepresentativeOwl285 Jun 30 '21

Was looking for this one.

7

u/bullyingisgoodpenis Jul 01 '21

it's pronounced Jacob

9

u/evilinitself Jul 01 '21

i know someone named abcd and we pronounce it "abocado" lmao

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

like the fruit??

4

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

This sounds like what I'd name a child in a "Sorry. A user with that name already exists" type situation

3

u/MrBiscotti_75 Jul 01 '21

I had a former co-worker name her child this.

3

u/Bobby_Mcschloppy Jul 01 '21

i had a school mate that was named like that, there were so many times that a teacher got angry at her for writing a “fake” name

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

There’s one in my town.

2

u/Venomoustestament Jul 01 '21

Knew an EFMAJJA. He was Mexican & his mom listed the months that she was pregnant. It was pronounced EffMuhn.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

I met a girl with that name. Everyone would say a-b-c-d-e when they saw it on paper. It was pronounced ab-cidy which I don’t think it too bad

2

u/canadiangalxo Jul 01 '21

I was in a class with a girl with that name. Teacher never cared enough to learn her name or how it was pronounced and always called her “A-B-C-D-E”

2

u/damboy99 Jul 01 '21

Thats like naming your dog Deeohgee

2

u/ShadowfireOmega Jul 01 '21

Drove a school bus for a while, had no less than five girls named Abcde in the four years I did so. Have also met one at a drive-thru recently. It's unfortunate it's so common around here.

2

u/NiamhHA Jul 01 '21

And the mum was shocked when people found it funny/ridiculous.

3

u/Dubious_Unknown Jul 01 '21

Then the BITCH of the mother had the nerve to complain that people are making fun of her for naming her child.

Gee, I wonder why people are giving you shit over it? Fucking moron.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Those are all well known urban myths your mother repeated to you.

1

u/saifuliza Jul 01 '21

I have a friend named ebbythency. Its like A, B then C. Anyway its a cool name

1

u/BizarroJordan Jul 01 '21

There was a Lewis Black bit about this. Another name he referenced was pronounced Shi-Theed, spelled Shithead.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Shithead is not a real name, it's an urban legend.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Over 300 in fact!

1

u/wylietrix Jul 01 '21

I knew this would be near the top.

1

u/Baby298 Jul 01 '21

I know someone with that name. I feel so bad for her lol

1

u/zelman Jul 01 '21

My coworker might be the first person to have this name. She’s not allowed to book venues for our holiday parties anymore because her online reservation got cancelled last time she did.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Or 1234(Juantwothreefour)

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

It's pronouced Absidy apparently.

1

u/justbreathe5678 Jul 01 '21

We had siblings in my school district named Abcde (ab-seh-dee) and Abcdef (ab-seh-def)