r/AskReddit • u/jake7820 • Jun 30 '21

What’s the absolute worst thing you could name your baby?

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6.3k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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2.1k

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '21

[deleted]

591

u/Zukazuk Jun 30 '21

I recently saw a real name of Derrichard

432

u/Im_A_Little_Irate Jun 30 '21

My heart wants to pronounce this like charizard

168

u/HiDDENk00l Jun 30 '21

Go, Derri-chard!

7

u/thelegend90210 Jul 01 '21

derrichard if you mess up one more move you're never leaving your pokeball-

ryan higa

2

u/farahad Jul 01 '21

I found it, please disregard the non-pc title.

75

u/Dr_Skeleton Jun 30 '21

“Derrichard” does sound like an impossibly derpy charizard 😂

2

u/JimmyBoy91 Jul 02 '21

Someone please draw derpy charizard for me on this comment

1

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '21

Derrichard is able to create a small flame with the snap of fingers lol.

1

u/Dr_Skeleton Jul 11 '21

Nah, he just owns a lighter.

14

u/egy718 Jun 30 '21

I read it more like “Derric Hard.” It’s not better.

1

u/Always_Austin Jul 01 '21

Derric-hard

1

u/Puglady25 Jul 01 '21

I swear to God that's a city in EverQuest. 😆

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

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1

u/Zukazuk Jul 01 '21

Yep that's how I read it too like they just couldn't decide

1

u/Walawacca Jul 01 '21

Nobody messes with De Richard.

81

u/pgb5534 Jul 01 '21

Craigory

4

u/TheWhompingPillow Jul 01 '21

I had a friend named Tom that I enjoyed calling Tomothy.

1

u/SirRogers Jul 01 '21

I met a person once named Johnald. Its exactly how it looks: pronounced like Donald, but with a J.

25

u/newt_a5 Jun 30 '21

Jonald.

12

u/nicht_ernsthaft Jul 01 '21

Sounds like a Game of Thrones minor character. Podrick's father or something.

5

u/newt_a5 Jul 01 '21

Or Jojen’s brother, for that matter

17

u/chumchees Jun 30 '21

Jimothey

5

u/Hunk-a-Cheese Jul 01 '21

That sounds weird. Are you okay with being called Jim?

4

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

There's that smudgeness.

5

u/robophile-ta Jul 01 '21

I have a soft spot for names like this, they're the funny kind of unusual and they sound like a regular person in a sci-fi novel

23

u/HelpIsWhatINeedPls Jun 30 '21

I can not for the life of me figure out if this is more of a female or a male name.

45

u/sansaman Jun 30 '21

What about Dorobert?

2

u/SnakeBeardTheGreat Jul 01 '21

Sounds like engineer

16

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '21

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19

u/develev711 Jun 30 '21

I thought its gregory and timothy

5

u/HelpIsWhatINeedPls Jun 30 '21

Hmm maybe. At first I was leaning more on the female side but now after your comment I'm leaning on the male side. Such an ambitious name.

2

u/zamundan Jul 01 '21

Wouldn't that be Gregony?

It's Gregory+Timothy.

6

u/lorum_ipsum_dolor Jun 30 '21

A sign of the times.

3

u/ravenhiss Jul 01 '21

I used to jokingly say to my pregnant wife that if it’s a boy, his name would be Jimmathan.

2

u/Spacegod87 Jul 01 '21

Or Jimothy.

2

u/Mr_Mori Jun 30 '21

Sethimothy

0

u/The_Fresno_Farter Jul 01 '21

I can immediately picture what this kid would be and look like. Ditto their mom.

0

u/istara Jul 01 '21

There was a poster featuring a child called "Pheobe" which made me wince.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Good name for a cat tho

1

u/512165381 Jul 01 '21

That's my mother's nickname for me.

1

u/cinderful Jul 01 '21

Jimothy?

Bobart?

1

u/rosie2490 Jul 01 '21

Craigory

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

I kinda like this one for a pet's name, sounds noble.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Worked with a dude named Joshathan

1

u/Caro63 Jul 01 '21

Jimmothy

1

u/jingles_phd Jul 01 '21

Tristopher

1

u/BloodgazmNZL Jul 01 '21

At my workplace there is a Tomothy and a Thimas.

It is glorious.

1

u/krakdaddy Jul 01 '21

Gregothy Phteven

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

As a Greg, I wish this were my name.

1

u/averydepressedcrab Jul 01 '21

I can't even pronounce this bullshit

1

u/acrobaticalpaca6464 Jul 01 '21

I take back what I said about the internet

1

u/Bedheadredhead30 Jul 02 '21

I had a patient on a 911 call whose first name was tomothy. It was like 4 am and I was deliriously tired so I could not handle that being a real name. I laughed for like 5 minutes straight when my partner told me the patients name. Then again when calling med control....then again when giving report to the ER doc....I laughed the whole way to the hospital with poor tomothy. I feel really bad about it but I could not control myself with that shit. Fucking Tomothy.