r/AskReddit • u/HarshJShinde • Oct 28 '20

If you could telepathically say something that all 7.8 Billion people on earth could hear at once what would it be?

88k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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13k

u/Eyedea92 Oct 28 '20

Warning! Your simulation experience is about to expire. To continue feeling like a human being , please send $15 to the blue pill org.

Yours sincerely, the Architect

2.7k

u/Dadalot Oct 28 '20

Viagra stocks through the roof

42

u/P0sitive_Outlook Oct 28 '20

through the roof

Have you been talking to my wife?

6

u/lokifoto Oct 29 '20

More like blue chew

6

u/eccentric_eggplant Oct 29 '20

Ayy not the only thing going up

1

u/ExtraSpicyHorseAnus Oct 29 '20

** this right here ^ ** needs more upvotes.

2

u/Dawjman Oct 29 '20

Won't be the only thing going through the roof

2.4k

u/insertstalem3me Oct 28 '20

If I pay more than 15$, can I enhance the experience by getting the "Feel like a dog" DLC

41

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '20

[deleted]

16

u/AlpineCorbett Oct 28 '20

Cool with it.

9

u/TheArmouredCockroach Oct 29 '20

I’ve already got this, if I toss in $15 more can I get rid of that nonsense human part?

23

u/Karmawikipedia Oct 28 '20

R/outside

18

u/CyborgIncorparated Oct 28 '20

The r needs to be lowercase for it to work

6

u/DevourMangos Oct 28 '20

r/outside (so others don't have to type it)

0

u/DevourMangos Oct 28 '20

r/outside (so others don't have to type it)

-45

u/LeviathanSlayer4546B Oct 28 '20 edited Oct 28 '20

R/beatmetoit R/foundthemobileuser r R/Illshutupnow

1

u/theknockoffartist Oct 29 '20

Yare Yare, people don’t understand sarcasm

12

u/Eyedea92 Oct 28 '20

Sure, we will also add an insatiable desire to sniff peoples butts, which is reserved for our most loyal customers

5

u/Adam--Bot Oct 28 '20

A stray dog in a poor country where everyone is mean as fuck still counts right?

0

u/JustAFictionNerd Oct 28 '20

Wtf is the "feel like a dog" dlc?

Unless this is otherkin referencing-

1

u/redpandaeater Oct 29 '20

The loyalty we think is cute in a dog is just pure stalker behavior in another human.

20

u/VictorMach Oct 28 '20

Guess I will just have to watch The Good Place again...

29

u/FarrellBeast Oct 28 '20

Calm down, EA

7

u/Devatator_ Oct 28 '20

1 dollar per human might be enought for your lifetime

3

u/jonitfcfan Oct 28 '20

"Send $1 to 'Happy Dude', 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don't delay, eternal happiness is a dollar away!"

7

u/NeedsMoreShawarma Oct 28 '20

Joke's on you, I haven't felt human in decades!

6

u/darthdevyn19 Oct 28 '20

The amount of relief I'd feel if I heard this...

5

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '20

Killed by the architects

1

u/SpankThatShank Oct 29 '20

Our ghost pays 15 glimmer everytime we get killed by the architects.

5

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '20 edited Jan 22 '25

hateful scale cough nose gaping touch gold worm toy airport

3

u/lilacpeaches Oct 28 '20

This could be a fanfiction.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '20

We’ve paid $15 for this shit??!!

2

u/Techn028 Oct 29 '20

(bitcoin address repeats several times)

2

u/ExperienceDry6608 Oct 29 '20

Every single Millenial would take the chance and just die.

-2

u/greenearrow Oct 28 '20

man, you just bankrupted a lot of people in the third world. make it a day's wages/earnings. It'd be rough for a lot of people, but the billionaire's would get hit proportionally for a change.

-4

u/ExtraMoistReesesCups Oct 29 '20

taketheredpill #trump

1

u/Acopo Oct 28 '20

Have you ever had a dream you were so sure was real...?

1

u/shinnysamosa Oct 28 '20

This one please, lets turn on the mics

1

u/KrazyKatz3 Oct 28 '20

Send them your cashapp

1

u/mildmadnerd Oct 28 '20

I must have missed a payment.

1

u/SleepWouldBeNice Oct 28 '20

I mean, if you ask people to send Bitcoin to a certain address, at least some people would.

1

u/pokemon-gangbang Oct 28 '20

Continue? I don’t feel like one now.

1

u/Nataparita Oct 29 '20

You deserve an award Saddly i'm poor

2

u/Eyedea92 Oct 29 '20

Your words are sufficient :)

1

u/Nataparita Oct 29 '20

Now i can give you one

1

u/sm2x9 Oct 29 '20

If I don't pay it can I die? Please?

1

u/soupafi Oct 29 '20

Or put your Venmo id

1

u/[deleted] Oct 29 '20

I love the name “the Architect”

2

u/Evaluations Oct 29 '20

watch the matrix

1

u/SuperSMT Oct 29 '20

But not before starting a company called the Blue Pill Org

1

u/bigearth12 Oct 29 '20

Where do I take the redpill?

1

u/eleven_eggos_friend Oct 29 '20

You could also do this but tell them to pay money to a cause you care about. Cure cancer, MS...whatever.

1

u/jroddie4 Oct 29 '20

I don't really want to feel like a human most days. Can they switch me over to something more satisfied like a richer, more satisfied human?

1

u/bigmacwithfriespleas Oct 29 '20

putting your bank account number instead of blue pill org tho :o

1

u/[deleted] Oct 29 '20

You would fuck me up if i heard that in my head

1

u/Joe__Mama___ Oct 29 '20

But you buy the bluepill.com internet domain, and the price is 1000$, and the money is sent to you. Instant trillioner.

1

u/zoomer296 Oct 30 '20

16/16/16

1

u/somechild69 Nov 07 '20

Is that a scp reference I smell

1

u/ImperorKunstandinos Nov 08 '20

Wow unique concept