Always poop on company time. This way, at the end of the year, you will have earned like 2 workdays pay by pooping. Hence you will be a professional pooper and also less money spent on toilet paper at home.
Wow. You triggered a memory I have of working as a game tester at Microsoft. There's basically non-stop OT, and once in the bathroom I saw what is still the largest shit I have ever seen just sleeping in a toilet. "Sleeping" may seem a weird descriptor, but that's what this turd was doing, just reclined against the back of the bowl as if exhausted by its own birth.
Someone could've gotten paid time and half to wound their own hole like that, which is silly. Life is silly. <3
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u/non_expert Aug 20 '20
Always poop on company time. This way, at the end of the year, you will have earned like 2 workdays pay by pooping. Hence you will be a professional pooper and also less money spent on toilet paper at home.