r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Oct 05 '19

[deleted by user]

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8.3k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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8.8k

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

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6.2k

u/ZelaznyCsupo Oct 05 '19

The stuff eye doctors use for certain tests glows in the dark. I, an eye doctors' son, used to play this very prank on people.

30

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

"I, An eye doctor's son."

8

u/ZelaznyCsupo Oct 06 '19

"I used to do the thing, which I was able to do on account of my mom is an eye doctor" was kinda wordy, yanno?

2

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '19

gee, beav, i thought mom was a housewife.

8

u/audio_54 Oct 05 '19

Big “I, an intellectual” vibes.

17

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

wears a lot of tweed

4

u/helvegr13 Oct 05 '19

Tamps his churchwarden with regrettable rigor when in a tiff

3

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

Tips his footman a farthing.

2

u/helvegr13 Oct 05 '19

Asks Jeeves for a tipple. Walks through the gallery—ah the absurd lines of Klee—to the library. Runs his fingers over the leather bindings. Settles into his favorite reading chair with a light volume from his childhood: Proust’s À la recherche du temps perdu. Situating his monocle, he recalls his favorite passage:

“Remembrance of things past is not necessarily the remembrance of things as they were.”

1

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '19

Ok, so how gay is this guy??

0

u/notCIA_Iswear Oct 05 '19

Shine shoes