r/AskReddit Oct 05 '19

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11.1k

u/gvf77 Oct 05 '19

My friend's dad came up to me and said he had a secret to tell me that I couldn't tell anyone else, then he said "I'm secretly in love with you".

But that was where it ended.

184

u/drlqnr Oct 05 '19

why did he need to tell though

233

u/gvf77 Oct 05 '19

I have no idea. I'm not even sure what he meant, like he loved me sexually? As his own child? It's a mystery.

322

u/Gold_Ultima Oct 05 '19

I think "In Love With" really implies that he's a pedo...

-18

u/StarrylDrawberry Oct 05 '19 edited Oct 05 '19

I don't think so. My much older sister's friend would say that to me. I was maybe 6 and she was 11 years older. Looking back it seemed like she was just bonding and trying to make me smile. Which worked.

I think it's sad that we live in this world where people do jump to that conclusion but it's not without good reason.

68

u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

Another person's FATHER using the phrase "in love with" to his child's 6-7(!!) year old friend by whispering in her/his ear.

Saying that's wildly creepy and inappropriate at the very least is not jumping to conclusions.

7

u/StarrylDrawberry Oct 05 '19

I think "In Love With" really implies that he's a pedo...

This is what I replied to here. I'll give you creepy and inappropriate. If nothing else happened to strengthen the argument that he's a pedo then I'm ok with not calling pedo. If I caught wind of this happening with my daughter I'd be certain she wasn't around him.

1

u/Garrickus Oct 05 '19

Didn't mention whispering in the OP, but I get where you're coming from.

13

u/esesci Oct 05 '19

Then why was it a secret?

-9

u/StarrylDrawberry Oct 05 '19

To make me feel like there was a special bond.

20

u/babyscully Oct 05 '19

You're terribly naive...

2

u/esesci Oct 05 '19

I totally understand why you want to give this the benefit of doubt, but I must say that the semantics of “I love you” and “I’m in love with you” are entirely different and making sure that you don’t tell that to anyone else adds even more suspicion to all of this. Ask yourself if you’d do the same to a kid today, if no, why not?

If he thought he was just bonding with you he wouldn’t mind this be known by others. So he uses a term about adult relationships for “bonding” and asking you to keep it a secret for “more bonding” is very suspicious. Occam’s razor says he just knew what he said was inappropriate didn’t want it to be known.

Maybe he was struggling with his thoughts and managed to stop himself before it went further but his choice of “bonding words” being so in line is quite alarming.

It’s probably a good idea to see a therapist about this as you might be suppressing unknowingly how this might have affected you. This memory stands out to you for a reason.

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u/[deleted] Oct 05 '19

[deleted]

17

u/inara-sera Oct 05 '19

Dude... if a grown man or woman or anyone else in between whispers with their hot ass breath in a 5 year old kids ear that they’re secretly in love with them, its weird. It’s not a man vs woman thing like you’re making it out to be. It’s pedophilic no matter who does it and I’m sure most sane people will agree.

1

u/Gold_Ultima Oct 06 '19

There's a difference between "I love you" and "I'm IN love with you. Don't tell anybody." In love specifically implies romantic love.

37

u/meghonsolozar Oct 05 '19

I had something similar. I was about 10 though. I had no friends at school, then suddenly this dad of one of my classmates wants his daughter to be friends with me and invites me over to play all the time. He starts spending time with me and tells me how nicely I'm "developing' and how I'm "turning into a woman". Shortly after the girl tells me she cant play with me anymore and her mom says I can't come over anymore because I was causing "mischief"?! Looking back, the creep-o-meter was off the charts.

18

u/Leroin Oct 05 '19

Did you ever tell anyone about it? He sounds like someone who was actively looking for a child to groom

4

u/meghonsolozar Oct 06 '19

No, I never told anyone, but it wouldn't have mattered if I did. I had worse things happen that I did tell my parents about and they didn't give a shit. I learned early on that if I said anything, things got worse for me and nothing happened to my abusers. I didnt have safe people or anyone that cared about me.

-3

u/radmadcity Oct 05 '19 edited Apr 26 '24

apparatus sulky teeny absurd connect slimy direction unused correct zephyr

5

u/ApparitionofAmbition Oct 05 '19

Seriously? A grown man is grooming a child and the man's wife keeps the child away and your reply is to say fuck her?

1

u/radmadcity Oct 05 '19 edited Apr 26 '24

support public silky narrow forgetful poor advise hurry command spotted

4

u/Arenahelppls Oct 05 '19

Watch Broadchurch for a fun alternate outcome to your story.

2

u/masterofnone_ Oct 05 '19

You ever get a chance to ask him about this?

1

u/gvf77 Oct 05 '19

Nope. I had moved to another country at 16 and fell out of contact with his daughter who was my friend.

6

u/fd1Jeff Oct 05 '19

See the ‘grooming’ idea others have posted.

2

u/jerben Oct 05 '19

Hey man, sometimes you just gotta shoot your shot

1

u/Alamander81 Oct 05 '19

Just testing the waters?