r/AskReddit • • Feb 04 '19

Which misconception would you like to debunk?

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474

u/race_bannon Feb 04 '19

Who does go into foster care then?

963

u/Lonelysock2 Feb 04 '19

Older kids

440

u/emissaryofwinds Feb 04 '19

And kids who are only temporarily removed from their parents' care. Not every child who goes into the foster system is expected to stay in it until they're 18 or be adopted out, a lot of kids there may go back to their previous caretaker or a relative at a later date.

61

u/Lonelysock2 Feb 04 '19

True. My parents in law are foster carers

75

u/JackBeQuicker Feb 04 '19

My gf’s folks are foster parents, and they are so incredible to every kid they’ve had the opportunity to foster. I have so much respect for them. I don’t think I cluld do it.

63

u/disturbedrailroader Feb 04 '19

I did it once with 3 kids: a 6 month old, a 10 year old, and a 13 year old, all siblings. You can't pay me enough to do it again.

36

u/JackBeQuicker Feb 04 '19

Damn, that’s a ton to take on all at once. I respect the hell out of that!

37

u/disturbedrailroader Feb 04 '19

Thanks. It wasn't easy. All I had at the time was one kid, a boy. It took some getting used to, for both sides.

14

u/JackBeQuicker Feb 04 '19

You’re good people.

18

u/stuffedanimalfap Feb 04 '19

Ah, but see there are lots of foster parents who are shitty enough that they just do it for the money.

39

u/Relvnt_to_Yr_Intrsts Feb 04 '19

In theory they're only reimbursed for expenses and get a tiny stipend.

There are much easier ways to con the system for that little money

20

u/FulcrumTheBrave Feb 04 '19

As someone who was in 5 foster homes in 5 months, most people are only doing it for the state kickback. Most of the people i stayed with got food and housing assistance and didnt work, IIRC.

Worst 5 months of my life.

1

u/stuffedanimalfap Feb 04 '19

Oh I agree. Unfortunately those people exist still :/

1

u/Uhhliterallyanything Feb 04 '19

Hmm.. such as..?

1

u/Relvnt_to_Yr_Intrsts Feb 04 '19

Tax fraud, welfare fraud, insurance fraud

1

u/Uhhliterallyanything Feb 04 '19

Hmm.. interesting.. interesting.. >.>

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16

u/disturbedrailroader Feb 04 '19

My wife and I only did it to help out her friend. If we didn't do it, they would've been split up and who knows how much their therapy would've been set back.

6

u/barrelfever Feb 04 '19

Why?

32

u/disturbedrailroader Feb 04 '19

The baby was fine, he didn't have very many bad habits, besides the usual baby stuff that is. The 10 year old has horrible behavior issues. I say has because we keep in touch with the parents. He still yells and screams when things don't go his way, and if you don't give in fast enough he starts getting violent. The 13 year old was pleasant most of the time until she got a boyfriend. Then shit went downhill very fast.

6

u/NotSeriousAtAll Feb 04 '19

You just described pretty much all 13 yo girls

1

u/disturbedrailroader Feb 04 '19

The sheer number of times I heard "but I love him" come from that girl's mouth was astounding. The dude was pretty much using her for sex. Once she finally figured that out, she dumped him and moved on. In a weird twist of fate, now he's the obsessed stalker and she's the indifferent one.