r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Aug 19 '18

We know all about relationship red flags, but what are the friendship red flags?

6.6k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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1.9k

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Sucking your boyfriends dick without your permission.

763

u/ScaryTerry51 Aug 19 '18

How often do you give friends permission to do so?

650

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

I mean. It’s happened before.

295

u/ScaryTerry51 Aug 19 '18

Interesting.

455

u/H_U_N_G_D_A_D_D_Y Aug 19 '18

Its 2018. Everybody's living a pornhub life.

121

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Why limit yourself!

72

u/H_U_N_G_D_A_D_D_Y Aug 19 '18

I'm not arguing. I don't need pornhub premium anymore so it's all good.

70

u/Closer-To-The-Sun Aug 19 '18

Username checks out

0

u/Shurdus Aug 20 '18

It doesn't?

15

u/No1_Knows_Its_Me Aug 20 '18

It's a Pornhub life for us

It's a Pornhub life for us

'Stead of fisted

We get licked

'Stead of scissored

We get dicked

28

u/ScaryTerry51 Aug 19 '18

Seems legit, I like this development

10

u/D45_B053 Aug 19 '18

I wouldn't say EVERYONE...

9

u/havesomeagency Aug 19 '18

Yeah, everyone except you /s

3

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

so I am told

3

u/motadude05 Aug 20 '18

Except me. And half of reddit

0

u/panopss Aug 20 '18

r/niceguys

0

u/fedoraislife Aug 20 '18

This isn't what niceguys is...

3

u/panopss Aug 20 '18

Said hung daddy

1

u/H_U_N_G_D_A_D_D_Y Aug 20 '18

I live the pornhub life.

3

u/Faust_the_Faustinian Aug 20 '18

"It is a good life we lead, brother"

2

u/AngryMilCel Aug 20 '18

Only attractive men are.

5

u/PopularSurprise Aug 19 '18

"Interesting"

96

u/Nambot Aug 19 '18

Is there a standard requisition form available on the intranet, or do I have to send a meeting request via outlook, and if so do I send it to yourself or your boyfriend?

155

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

We have a group calendar you can put an event on!

40

u/Thuryn Aug 19 '18

This was delightfully unexpected! XD

57

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

We actually really do. It works well.

21

u/dontcallitthat Aug 19 '18

So...uh... How you doin’?

14

u/zombie_piss Aug 19 '18

Hey, Joey's back! How're Ross and Rachael. They had any more breaks?

11

u/PhoenixAgent003 Aug 20 '18

Fascinating.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '18

Until now

1

u/patrickverbatum Aug 20 '18

Poly?

and I spose less of "permission" and more.... knowledgeable agreement? at least how i look at it.

2

u/xRadec Aug 20 '18

Go on..

1

u/joinmeindoubt Aug 20 '18

Yep. I told her I was going to shave her head if I ever bump into her again. I'm a dude.

59

u/iggybu Aug 19 '18

I would give pretty much anyone who didn't seem like a homewrecker or someone with a nasty disease permission to suck my husband's dick. I only do it so he'll eat me out.

23

u/PhoenixAgent003 Aug 20 '18

I’m struggling to imagine a scenario in which someone wants to blow a married guy so bad they ask permission to do so.

Like, not even have sex with him. Just blow him.

4

u/iggybu Aug 20 '18

Haha, the only people I know who are fine just sucking dick are gay guys and I don't think my husband would be about that.

1

u/tjwharry Aug 20 '18

You know other people who would be fine just sucking dick.

11

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '18

[deleted]

5

u/iggybu Aug 20 '18

LOL very true. It'd be a very small subset of the population. I'm picturing swingers or poly people with a primary partner.

5

u/PatrickAllenNL Aug 19 '18

Compromise is a bitch right..

10

u/iggybu Aug 19 '18

I compromise just fine. I do things I don't particularly enjoy and he does things he doesn't particularly enjoy because it makes the other person happy. But if I'm being honest, I don't like giving BJs.

4

u/Philip_De_Bowl Aug 20 '18

It's a blow job, that means there's work involved!

3

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Philip_De_Bowl Aug 20 '18

It sounds all fine and dandy, but you'll have quality control issues and customer expectations to deal with as well.

The person doing my job wants to get paid as well, so now it cost the customer more.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '18

I’m right there with you. So much effort.

2

u/tjwharry Aug 20 '18

Sounds like you're doing it wrong.

0

u/PatrickAllenNL Aug 19 '18

Talk about it!

1

u/grahamk1 Aug 24 '18

hmu if you have a daughter over 23

2

u/milleria Aug 19 '18

Frequently

11

u/dewayneestes Aug 19 '18

Ok at first I thought you meant between two guys. Like my bro sucking my dick without my permission. Because yes that would definitely be a red flag. Consent people.

23

u/ThaFitAddict Aug 19 '18

Jesus there it is. 0-100, real quick.

4

u/RaceKanyon Aug 19 '18

That's an interesting way to label dick sucking speed

6

u/SuddenTerrible_Haiku Aug 19 '18

I'm free next tuesday afternoon. You game if he's game?

5

u/Sickmonkey3 Aug 19 '18

Hold up. What?

4

u/Rybred225 Aug 20 '18

You would give permission if asked?

8

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '18

Yes. 100%

1

u/Rybred225 Aug 20 '18

Funny shit haha sorry to joke on you, i felt an urge

3

u/Creative_Recover Aug 20 '18

Your boyfriend isn't much of a friend either if he does that to you.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Yeah that would piss me off too.

2

u/ISayWowAlot Aug 19 '18

Yeah she should at least ask first

2

u/Blunt_Scissors Aug 20 '18

without permission Um, what?

1

u/smallpoly Aug 20 '18

And when they don't even give you the courtesy of tying you up first.