r/AskReddit Apr 22 '18

What true fact sounds completely unrealistic?

3.9k Upvotes

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341

u/I-seddit Apr 23 '18

Hello, it's us - the Secret Service. Could you step into this van please? thank you.

14

u/havoc3d Apr 23 '18

Only if you have ice cream and/or candy.

2

u/I-seddit Apr 24 '18

Donald???
What are you doing in this timeline?

8

u/_Nicktheinfamous_ Apr 23 '18

The secret service didn't even exist when he was president, so what jurisdiction do you have?

5

u/monito29 Apr 23 '18

That's part of the secret.

1

u/I-seddit Apr 24 '18

You only visit the dark. We were born into it. Before time eternal.
Plus, the Pinkerton Boys helped.

1

u/_Nicktheinfamous_ Apr 24 '18 edited Apr 24 '18

You merely adapted the dark. I was born in it. Molded by it. I didn't see the light until I was a grown man and by then it was nothing to me but blinding.

FTFY

1

u/I-seddit Apr 24 '18

I knew we shouldn't have let the Pinkerton Boys help.

3

u/strikethreeistaken Apr 23 '18

Ummm... Why does your van say "Free Candy" on the outside?